Finding a faith?

Hi Everyone,

I've been wanting to post this for a while. I was raised Catholic in every sense of the word. When my parents separated I ceased to believe in my religion because my parents (mostly my mother) blew apart all teachings and beliefs that I was taught. As a young woman I also had a really hard time accepting a lot of the teachings around women. I always questioned these teaching but was told to just accept that this is how it is.

From there I did some searching but never got into the nitty gritty of any particular belief or faith. I met some people who were apparently "spiritual". I liked some of their ways and they sat well with me.

Then I met my husband who was raised Polish Catholic. He didn't practice at all after he left school. We married in a Catholic Church, go to the odd mass and have Christened our kids in the Catholic Church.

Recently we've both been looking for a faith that is going to sit right for us. I think we are fundamentally Christian but with a little bit of 'spiritualist" mixed in. We don't agree with all the goings on of the Catholic Church, but we do know that on a local level that the church does some excellent work.

My question: How did you find the right place or religion for you?

I am interested in Buddhism to some extent and would love to read a book about it, so as to understand it fully

:hug: Bekz I think it's quite common for people to reach the place you are - I've been there and have come to the conclusion that no single religious organisation is going to deliver it all. So accordingly I pick and mix. I know that sounds flakey, but the reality is that the spiritual essence of what I crave is present in all the big religions and philosophies around the world - so I choose to access that in my own spiritual practice without necessarily adopting the traditions/culture/dogma associated with those religions. It's a mystical pathway.

Have you checked out your local spiritualist church...they are Christian but with some other stuff added in (like healing & channelling). Also, Buddhism is a large term that encompassees lots of seperate schools/practices and a lot of them are heavily mired in the culture of the country of origin, but it is possible to take up some of the practices without all of them. If you adopt a mindfulness meditation practice (see Ian Gawler, Jon Kabat-Zinn, Jack Kornfield) that will give you a good basis for the core of Buddhism, but someone like Pema Chodron is a good place to start.

ETA - also wanted to say - I know people who have continued to 'hang in there' with the Catholic church while privately disagreeing with some of the more conservative teachings. There was a movement in Australia about 20 years ago to switch to more female-inclusive language & practice in the Mass & the liturgy, it had a strong following until some of the bishops came down heavy, and it resulted in part by the rise to power of George Pell who is very conservative, and has turned back the clock a bit with regards to these things in Australia. So there could still be a place for you in the Catholic church - sometimes it's just a case of finding a parish that is a good match for you and your family. Alternatively there are some more liberal churches based on the Catholic practice (I always find it very entertaining to go thru the churches index of the street directory and find out just how many varieties of "catholic" there are). The Anglican church is similar in some ways to Catholicism (having started with the same theology) but has some more liberal views re ordination of women etc, and the Uniting Church in Aust also seems (from the outside) to be more liberal and many of hte protestant churches have more of a focus on the individual reading the scripture and developing their individual conscience rather than relying on "rules" laid down by the Church as their moral compass. So I think in some senses you might need to "shop around", talk to people who practice, maybe visit a few churches, look for a community that is welcoming and contains the essence of what you seek. HTH.

Thanks MD you've pretty much summed up where I am at and given me some direction to start looking. As you know I am raising 3 little women and I growing up I certainly didn't agree with a lot of our teachings. I guess I need a place that is slight pro woman

Off the the Yellow Pages I go..lol

Bimboo - Thanks for your perspective. I guess I've persevered with the Catholic Church because that is all I know and going anywhere else is kinda like "cheating" (I can't think of a better word). Right now though I am open to finding a faith sit right for me and hopefully my family.

Bekz a GF of mine was raised Anglican as as her DH but they now go to a generic Christian church (?). They literally shopped around and visited a heap of different Churches over a number of years to find a priest/pastor and congregation they clicked with. I know my friend and her DH listed a whole heap of things that were important to them in a church, such as tolerance, focus on the family, a strong emphasis on community/charity work and so on. So maybe try that approach - you might for example be strongly attracted to Buddhism for example, but if you don't find a group that wroks for you it won't help you on your path IYKWIM? hope this helps :)

I was raised JW but left after serious family issues and a complete lack of support from them. I won't go into it here.

I didn't attend church at all for many years and completely lost faith. But after DD was born I took her down to our local Anglican church and have never stopped going. It felt like home, the people were welcoming and we received a lot of support. Perhaps my expectations have changed as I got older too. They are an evangelical Anglican church (some churches do more of the high-church type services/practices, some don't) and I was much happier with their inclusion of women as ministers, etc. This wasn't something JWs did and it never sat right with me either. The other thing that was important to me was the children's program, since giving DD a grounding in faith in a positive way was part of my motivation.

I know Catholic parishes can often be the same, it depends on the area, the congregation and the priest. There's nothing wrong with visiting a few churches and seeing if that fits for you. If you are comfortable with keeping some of the traditions of the Catholic faith but can't find a church you like in your area, I would try an Anglican church first as they are probably the most similar.

GL!