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Hey guys, I have a 2 week old baby and am just wondering when we should start getting into a routine and which sort of routines would you recommend?
I have the GIna Ford book which i find a nightmare - some things she says are sensible, others I find it a bit Hitler-ish.
We are establishing the bathtime routine at the moment and am just wondering how to go about the rest of the day.
Thanks
Sue x
Some people are all for routines and some are completely against them. Personally, I've found having a routine made life so much easier. TBH we sort of fell into one which was based on the feed, play, sleep recommendation. In the early days DS would feed for about 45 mins, I'd have a play with him for 15 or 20 mins and then it was back to sleep, for however long he slept. Generally though he was feeding every three hours. At the end of the day we would do bath time instead of a play which I think meant he quickly worked out that bathtime meant it was night time and time for a long sleep iykwim.
Personally I'm not one for set times, we get up at this time and you get fed at this time kind of thin, but I think it if you start having a pattern to your day then a routine quickly emerges which might vary by an hour of so each day, but it makes it much easier for you to plan and also easier for bubs because they know what's going on iykwim.
Anyway, hope this helps.
i think allowing your dd to show you her routine is the best way, then its not a forced idea...
she is only 2 weeks there will be MANY bumps in the road between now and about 4/6 months when they kind of settle.. because they change so much in that time what works today may not in a couple of days.. so i always recomend going with the flow babies know what they want when they want it, no baby manual is personalised to each child :)
:yeahthat: What oorki said!
I cant comment on the baby routines books, as I have never read any of them, but with DS I just followed his lead, we demand fed so, it all went around his feeds, by about 3-4 months he had a nice little natural routine going, which while we had a few bumps along the road (wonder weeks, developmental stages, teething etc..) he pretty much stayed the same.
The only things I did were to put him to sleep during the day in the longe room in his rocker (not the basinette/cot/our bed as they were for night sleeps) and the bedtime/bath thing.
Every baby is different though, DS is such an easygoing kid, he will roll with whatever is going on, but I know other kids who need to have that "routine" of sleeping in the same place, fed at the same times etc, find what works for you and do it!
HTH a little :) xx
everyone will have diff opinions on them.We didnt want to en force any of her ,we did a bath time routine at night, feed, bath song wrapped up top up feed if needed and bed,but thats ut.
Hannah made her own routine, she fell into one herself which i find great,i know know when she will play when she will feed( most time) and when she will nap.
I really like this as its letting her decide what she needs and wants.
Its up to you ,you need to find what suits you and your bub the best xx
we've also followed DS' lead here as well, based around demand feeding. at the start i looked so desperately for patterns (set feeding times, wake up times, length of sleep etc) & was tearing my hair out because there weren't any! over time, DS has fallen into a 'routine' by himself with regards to nap times & bedtime but tbh, it was only really once he started eating solids that this seemed to really come into play.
the main thing we did from the start was try and distinguish between night
& day. we found his cranky time, sorry - i mean 'unsettled' time - was from around 4ish so we started bathing him then because it soothed him. that was the start of our nightly wind down & has been going since he was just a few weeks old. we've added things along the way, like quiet play in his room after his bath, as he's got older & has more awake time.
i think the difficulty of too much parent-driven routine too early can be that your baby will change & then you're kind of back at square one. BUT, as STARRYSKY said, all babies are different & there are some who thrive on routine. it all seems to be a bit of trial & error to see what works best for your baby & for you :)
We were lead by what the baby wanted in those first few months and both girls sort of fell into their own patterns or routines. Having said that, DD2 sort of fell into line with DD1 just because of the way things felt and worked in the house if that makes sense?
I think the first 6 weeks are all about them working out that they are out in the big wide world and it is all pretty freaky for them so I tried just to keep them as close as possible. After that they started to be awake a bit more and be a bit more interactive and lead the way.
I did start off making sure bathtime and bedtime were consistent but that was because I wanted DP to do these things so they needed to be at a time where he could participate and be involved.
We did what worked for that particular day until Moo was about 6 months old. He put himself in a routine. I find it still changes depending on his needs at the time. If he's going through a developmental stage he needs alot more attention & everything takes more time for example
I've let jackson sort out his own routine... I found it frustrating when it's "time for bed" but they don't want go to bed... and you sit around for 2 hours trying to get them to sleep when you could have just been enjoying them instead :)
Is there a reason you feel you need a routine Sue?
Your baby girl is very small, all she needs is milk when she's hungry, sleep when she's tired, nappy change when she's dirty, and cuddles from her mummy and daddy. Unfortunately babies don't read the books and so often when we tried to put them into routines we have read and that sound good to us, they don't fit the baby and then mum ends up feeling stressed!!
If I could give one piece of advice to new mums it would be put down the books, trust yourself. You don't need anyone to tell you how to do things, you will know if you listen to your instincts and your baby, I promise. You are the perfect Mumma for your baby and you are entirely capable of looking after her all by yourself without any help from any 'expert' in a book. It's amazing!!
If you are a reader and feel like you do want something to read on parenting the one book I loved and would recommend was 'Parenting by Heart' by Pinky McKay.
:hug: You're doing a great job, well done!
Thanks for all the input guys, I'm not thinking of a routine at the moment - or ever for that matter, I just wondered what others do.
Evie is getting herself into a wee routine anyway already - she's a smart wee thing. My only concern is the bedtime thing - she seems to enjoy a 3 hour sleep from 5pm - 8pm and then wakes quite cranky. Am wondering if this will continue or she'll change things around herself. I'd love to get a bedtime routine going if I do nothing else.
Thanks again
Sue x
Hi Sue...wow cant believe little Evie is already 2 weeks old :)
I did the whole bath,bottle/bf, bed routine with both of my boys and i plan on doing that with this little one too when she/he arrives .....other then the bedtime routine i just took everyday as it came, i found that the easiest way especially when they are so little. Your doing a wonderful job, cant wait to meet little Evie.
Take care :hug:
My little one has a 'routine' that involves party time from midnight to about 3am! hopefully this is one part she will change soon.
take care,
Kate
Pretty much the same here as most others.
My main routine was a night time one of a bath, feed and bed beginning at 6pm. She pretty much does what she likes during the day as long as it fits in with what I want to do :lol:
We try the feed, play, sleep and sometimes it's feed, play, feed sleep.
You can try and make the feeds different, so a happy, chatty feed during the day and the quiet, cuddle feed at night and see if that helps.