Need advice on how to handle a fussy 10mth old...

My DS is almost 10 months. We started BLS at around 6 months, but it really wasn't till about 8 months that he got interested in eating. Before then it was a mouthful or two and playing with the food.

So over the last couple of months his eating has gotten better and better. He's now on 3 meals a day. But he is becoming more and more fussy with his eating. Being a BLS bub he really doesn't like being spoon fed and will only eat yoghurt or weetbix (until recently) from the spoon. This makes it really hard for me to find different things to feed him, he won't touch pasta or rice (except for mac and cheese which he eats with his hands), or really eat anything which has mixed flavours (eg stews, casseroles, patties etc). He seems to like single flavors at a time.

Over the last month or so as I've tried to increase his intake and made a point of continuing to offer him food until he refuses. So for brekky he'll typically have some cereal or toast and then fruit until he's full. Lunch/dinner might be sausages or fish and veg, mac and cheese, sandwhiches, sausage roll, sushi roll etc and then some yoghurt or fruit until he's full.

When I offer something different, be it bolognese (with pasta or in a sandwich), casserole, chicken, cauliflower, pumpkin (which he did eat when he first started), zuchini, pasta he will usually put it to his mouth briefly (but not really taste it) and then throw it on the floor.

But it seems he is getting sick of his 'usual' foods and 'fussier' with new foods. Part of me wonders if he has worked out that if he hangs out I'll offer him something different (be it a cream cheese sandwich which he loves) or bring out the good stuff (fruit or yoghurt).

DH thinks I should just take the 'if you don't eat what's on offer, you don't get anything else' approach. I think this might have its place down the track, but tend to think that at the moment when we are trying to establish eating solids that he won't care and will just have extra BF's to make up the difference.

So I guess I'm asking for your advice and thoughts on how I should handle this. DS still has 4 or 5 BF's a day and I had always thought we'd wean at 12mths or at least get to just a morning and night feed at that point. But at the moment I'm just not sure where we are at or how we're going to get there...

Miss E, this is one of the really common concerns that mums have. I think you are probably going to get some conflicting advice in this thread.

My experience with DS1, was that he started off only liking a few things - yoghurt, cheese, banana, sandwich and weetbix was pretty much it. Like your DS, he only started having any interest in food at around 8 or 9 months, and even then only ate a very small amount. I was so worried that he wasn't getting enough food that everytime he refused the offered foods, I followed up by giving him one of his favourites. The problem quickly became that he never even bothered trying the other foods because he knew a favourite would always come next.

Babies often need to try something 10 times (or in my experience, even more), before they like it. Part of learning to eat well is trying new foods by touching them, licking them etc well before starting to eat them. It is a normal way for babies to learn and get used to new foods. This is one of the good things about the period up till about 12 months, where the food really is a learning experience and the breastmilk is the main source of nutrition. You can keep offering a new food multiple times until they are used to it, and it doesn't matter that they are not eating it at first.

I know some people disagree with me on this, but after my experience, I suggest that your DH's idea is a good one. If he doesn't eat what's offered, don't offer anything else. Babies do not starve themselves, if they are hungry they do eat. And it doesn't take long for them to figure out that the choice is the first food offered or nothing. Now is a good time to do it as you know he is getting the nutrition he needs from bm.

Also with DS2 I never offered him anything different after the first choice and he has always been a fantastic eater - he loves fruit and vegs - he even asks for peas and carrots for dinner and has seconds of them!

I'm sorry if this isn't what you wanted to hear, but it is my experience and what worked for us. GL with it all hun, this can be a very stressful time :hug:

Thanks MR, I think that is what I needed (and tbh wanted) to hear. I guess I just need to be a little bit tougher...

Do you think that if he does eat well that I still give him fruit or yoghurt at the end of the meal, or maybe hold off on that for a bit? Also if I am introducing something new, lets say a risotto for example that has veggies etc in it, should I give it with some steamed veggies that he does like, or does that only encourage him to stick with the same old favourites?

I guess where I get a bit stumped by the whole thing is that sometimes (actually quite rarely) I will give him something new, like the fish the other day and even tofu last night, and he will take to it straight away... But then there are things like a baked chicken and vegie dish or bolognese or cauliflower that he won't even touch...

:hug: I think too much emphasis is placed on food at such a young age. Dd was a great eater then not so great and now ok...showing that what your ds likes know may totally change in a few months. We just give dd whatever we eat. If she doesn't like it, then never mind, she'll have a bfeed instead.

I too thought I would reduce feeds by 12 months, but when we got there I realized dd was still so little! Breastfeeding is so much more then food, so I hope you are able to keep feeding.

GL! You're a very caring mummy!!

Thanks for posting this MissE and thanks Manta for giving some great advice.. We are having similar issues here. In my experience my bubs go off pumpkin first because I'll always used it as a first food and they seem to get sick of it.

You'll also find that your little man will eat very well at times and then go off food or certain flavours or textures periodically as well. My theory is to keep offering.

My DD2 (who is 2.5years old) didn't like solids much and I always caved in and gave her the foods that she did liked after a main meal. Consequently she is a real fussy eater and we have massive tanties if she doesn't get the food she wants. We are currently addressing this issue.

GL xxoo

Miss E, I'm glad that you found my post helpful. I think if he eats well then it's fine to offer fruit or yoghurt afterwards. It's really a personal preference. Also, with regard to new foods, I think often we, as mums, make solids more complicated than we need to. I would cook whatever you usually cook for your family, and offer some to your DS. This is both easier for you now, and better for you all down the track, as it means that your DS will get to like your typical family foods earlier. Many of us find things much easier with subsequent siblings, as we just don't have time to cook anything different and we quickly find that our little ones are just fine with our usual meals.

All the best hun.

i really agree with MR (both posts)....
DS2 had v low int insolids - now he is starting to woplf stuff down - and it is all our normal food. i find annabel karmel has some good food ideas in her books - i just got the finger foods one and have made a few things which both boys love...
Since solids dont play too much of a part nutritionally for a while yet I just offer and if he eats - great.
I do offer fruit/yog or something after - but i get him to try other tastes/textures.
i also think trying things quite afew times is important so i make things available and he takes it from there...

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i find annabel karmel has some good food ideas in her books - i just got the finger foods one and have made a few things which both boys love...

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I saw that finger foods book a couple of months a go and am now kicking myself for not buying it at the time! I've been looking everywhere for it now and nowhere seems to have it :wall:

i buoght it on fishpond (i think that's what its called)
i could photocopy you some pages and email/post them to you... PM me if you want to (and what type of things you want - veg, chicken, fish, meat etc)

Thanks MamaPan! I just ordered a copy :)

I agree with MR too, Miss E.

We offered DD leftovers or versions of food we were eating ourselves. I would offer a variety at each meal, so some different types of vegies with whatever meat, or a risotto, if we had that, etc. I would try to include something she liked when something new was introduced. If she didn't eat it, fine, but I would keep offering. BLS was wonderful for us, DD eats most foods readily (she still has her fussy days where whatever is on offer for dinner isn't what she wants, but at four she's into a different phase!). She loves vegies though and they are never rejected - even now!

Dinner was always removed when she didn't want anymore of what she had in front of her. I offered her yoghurt once a day if she had pretty much finished her meal, but I always made that meal slightly smaller ITMS. Fruit was what she got for a snack here, in between meals.