Your Toddler - Does What They're Asked Or Need Explanations?

This is an observation really rather than a whinge but I've noticed that some toddlers generally seem to do what they're asked ie. sit down, come on we're leaving now, get in the carseat please, etc. etc. whereas others (like DD) need explanations.

It took some time to work this out! But we really have to explain A LOT - she won't just do something because we've asked her to. She needs to understand why. Now, like I said, I think that this is quite a good character trait to have, it's just a little exhausting sometimes. We have to explain (and make things up) like:

she needs to sit down not stand up on the bar stool or she could fall and get a bonky head. She thinks falling is "funny" so then we have to explain that falling isn't really funny and remember when you fell off the ladder DD and you got a BIG bonky head?

she needs to get in her car seat because if she sits in the other seat she could go BOOOM into the windscreen

we have to leave now because all the ladies in the shop want to go to bed

we can't sit on that cafe table because they don't bring you pizza at that table

you can't bang the table number on the table because it's too noisy and the ladies won't bring the babycino to noisy people

we have to drink drinks at the table because if there's spills, the couch and rug are hard to clean

You get the picture.

What variety of toddler do you have?

We have one that asks WHY? and asks it about 3,000 times. I think now she uses it as a stalling technique as well!

Ours is kind of similar, and like you I see it as a good character trait to have (as someone who asked why all the time myself and was told off and even punished for it at times)

However, he's also very cheeky and will deliberately do something and tell us haha mummy now XYZ will happen because I did ....

Hmmm, probably a bit of both? Sometimes he will be quite happy to just do as he is asked, but depending on what he is doing, or the situation we are in he will get a bit stubborn. I think sometimes too I just give the explanation/reason even if he is doing what he is asked.

I STILL have that problem with my 12yo DS!

I've learnt over the years to give an explaination at the time of saying what I want him to do :rofl: It's become such a habit that find myself doing it all the time. Last night I took my nephew shopping with me, I was taking him to the toilet but instead of saying "Come on we're going to the toilet" I said "ok you're going to the toilet now becasue...blah blah blah" I htink he switched off half way through :rofl:

I can give explanations until I'm blue in the face and DD1 STILL won't do as she's told. Grrr!
I envy those parents with kids who just do as they're told first time, every time, no questions or arguments... DH and I have to explain, then insist, insist AGAIN, then bribe, then threaten... gaaaahhhh!

Our DS doesn't always ask why but it saves time to give him an explanation from the beginning as he is more likely to do it, do it quickly and remember the next time. He often reminds us later if we do the same thing about not doing it and why (e.g. "mum we don't sit on the arm of the couch because we might fall off"). Bit embarrassing to have your toddler remind you of the rules! lol

he he, I have a why kid.

we have to explain. re falling ours is you will have to go to hospital if you fall, he doesn't like hospitals, he's already been in on 2 short occasions.

carseat, the policeman will lock mum & dad up. he doesn't understand the concept of flying through the windscreen.

DS has an elephants memory and will repeat almost anything, even complex things. He showed me a toy cow, with udders yesterday and told me milk coms from cows and pointed to the udders, I didn't teach him that, not sure who did.

to stop the barage of Whys you have to come up with an extreemly complex responce, and they get bored.
eg: why does it rain: - discuss water droplets clouds etc, throwing in as many technical temrs as you can remember, but don't dumb anything down for a why kid, or you get more why's, give my ds a technicall boring answer and he stops asking.

I'm also on occasion not advers to the 'because mummy said so' learnt that from my mum. and counting to 3 to get him to listen, and sto stalling.

I also don't care if I have to drag a toddler kicking and screaming from a shop I'll get him back one day, I'll chuck a tanti when he's older or be embarrasing in front of friends. ;)

it was good to read all these responses especially on a day when it seemed like dd was the only toddler who wouldn't do as she was asked.