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Due to my anixety and things i am really considering this as an option prior to the birth of our first child, i hope DH will gain knoweldge in how to support me too, as all he is saying at the moment is 'well you'll just get an epidural' (a friends wife did and they are so positive about it)
I will if and when i need to but do not want to go in with that as a irst option IYKWIM??
so can you tell me your experiance with calm birth or any recomendations
Thank you
Lou
No experience, but I've enrolled in a a calm birth class. I'm also doing Hypnobabies home study course (CDs & books) in order to prepare.
Have you spoken to your DH about the possible risks/escalations that can occur with an epidural? Would he want someone going near his spine with big needle? Not bagging them if needed, but if you want birth one way and he overrules that in the heat of things, then you may end up resenting him.
Rhea Dempsey's class is also receommended. I've seen her and she's very good at spelling things out.
Thanks Tash,
can i asked what did you look for in the class, midwife backgroud? there are so many out there.
We met the women who run the one we're doing at a BB birth workshop last year. I picked their brochure up somewhere recently. They are a couple of doulas. My midwife described them as pretty radical, but we like them and as I'm aiming for a homebirth, I don't mind radical :) Also, the course is close by and run over 2 Sundays, which works for us (as opposed to evening courses).
lou, Pandora and I did a calmbirth course through Shel at Gentle Beginnings. she was fantastic. she went through a lot of stuff about the birthing process (mechanics behind it all), why intervention spiral occurs, ways to calm yourself and how DH could support me. she was really good with the anxiety stuff (looking at triggers) etc. if you google gentle beginnings it should come up - happy to talk to you more on msn if you have any q's hun
Lou, we went to one in Upper ferntree gully which is run by a doula. It had DH all excited of me having a natural birth by the end of it, and I was confident that he was as prepared as he could be!! Although I ended up with a c/s, the techniques and knowledge we both gained from it were invaluable.
Thanks for all your replies i dont know how i missed them till today!
Well DH was not happy about me looking into this, he and MIL think its totally unnessary and a waste of money! well see what the weekend brings
hey loula! i am currently doing a calmbirth course run by a midwife that works both independently and through the RWH, Sue Power, her course is called 'naturally calmbirth'. the classes are nice and small (max of 4 couples). so far (like 2 classes in lol) both DH and i are LOVING it. you get booklets and CDs to take home and practice with throughout as well which has been awesome for me to learn the breathing etc. also i really like that the people coming are from all walks of life. so there are couples that are going private, public and homebirth, and Sue is able to accomodate that and show different ways/techniques of applying calmbirth to each unique setting/complication (so last week she went through how to promote the release of oxytocin (love hormone to help with bonding etc) during a c-section and afterwards. great stuff that i now need to add to my birth plan if a c/s is needed!
Tell your DH that it is totally normal thing to go to birth education classes...calmbirth is just a great way for mums and partners to learn strategies and techniques that will help throughout labour and the support techniques are AMAZING in that partners can learn ways of supporting both mum and bubs at a time when it is really easy for them to be shoved aside in the 'rush' of things (this is why we joined up in the first place as DH really felt left out last time with DD, as he didnt know what to do and the midwives werent really interested in showing him ITMS).
no disrespect to your DH, but is he the one going to birth your baby? and why is your MIL even figuring into this conversation? None of her business, IMO (not knowing your relationship with your MIL so sorry if that's out of line) Is she going to be filling his head with how you should raise your child too?
have you looked at getting a doula. He may not be able to support you in getting the kind of birth you want if he's not willing to look at other alternatives. So a doula may help you with your anxiety.
Geoff and I did one run by Laney at Lotus Calmbirth...she is also a midwife at Monash which was a bonus. phooey to your hubby....We had a C-section and using the calmbirthing techniques i was able to bring my heart rate down from 160 to 90 in the space of about 15 seconds and maintain it there for the duration of the operation. This helped immensely with the panicked feelings and also minimised the surgical blood loss cos it wasnt pumping so fast so throw that fact at your hubby!!!! My obstetrician reckons it was one of the best things i could have done for the sake of both our healths.
Thats who i am planning to go with hehe:
ha ha! great minds! i can highly recommend her on all fronts. she is also my support midwife (we are having this bubs at home) and is just a lovely person.
I guess i wrote in not so many words lol
MIL is retired MW and both DH are as we call 'tight arses!' lol i guess they look at it as you are having a class with the hospital so what more do you need! Ive already said to SIL (who is also training MW) that its no about the pain, im sure it is a little, but more about how i will react and keep in control, its bad enough i suffer with anixety and panic attacks, so if there is anything i can do to reduce that fear and tention the better, DH woke up this morning and said if you want to do the class then we will.
Then i called him at work as i do in the mornings and he asked me how much lol the reply was well maybe we need to discuss this a little more, after paying so much for so many years of IVF, then the cost of the most expensive OB in the bloody world, me being signed off work and both of us wanting me to be at home for the first two years it all adds up. DH job can change at any time as he works on sites so i guess its all stresses and strains on the family.
Will keep you posted
Mel great to know she is at Monash, were classes weekends or evenings? and do you remember the cost?
Thanks again gals x
It's definitely worth doing Loula :) I used calm birthing techniques with DS2 & DD and had wonderful labours with them both. My birth story for DD is here if you would like to read my experience: https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...alm-birth.html :).
Also, I highly recommend reading this thread here: why we feel pain in labor and pain relief methods. I didn't do a calmbirthing class, but found the info in this thread VERY helpful. I give it credit for my great labours :D
Booked!! hehe
:) Good to hear!!
I thought it was funny that your DH and MIL think you don't need anything other than the hospital classes. The calmbirth course is so much better, and a completely different focus to the hospital classes. We only did the hospital ante natal classes so we could have a sticky beak around the hospital more and to get a feel for how they generally do things as we had no idea what to expect.
I'm sure you'll get a lot out of it. :)
Great you have booked your classes! Could you watch The Business of Being Born with your husband too? Might help him see how interventions take away the birth experience from women and can cause a cascade of interventions and distress for babies... then he might be able to better support and understand you in labour.
Hi Lou
We just returned from the two day CalmBirth course run by Peter Jackson who is the midwife that set it all up. Its a beautiful, inspiring, uplifting and positive course that provides alternative perspectives with lots of DVD testimonial/stories told by people who experienced different births, like Melbel.
Can't recommend it highly enough and am so glad you have booked in. It was also a lovely time to spend with DH focusing on Phoenix and our bonding with him/her before birth. So much to gain and nothing to loose IMO.
Best of luck and well done you!
xx
ETA. I agree with Meow, we really found TBOBB helpful to inform us of the type of birth we wanted and an insight into the medical cascade/belief system that can influence your birth outcomes if we don't have the knowledge and understanding of the choices available to us giving birth. I really think CalmBirth has given us the tools to avoid the problems outlined in TBOBB.