Do you be positive or nagative???

I was wondering if anyone could give me their opinion on how they feel is best to get through the IVF procedure? I am on my 3rd cycle at the moment and i feel a bit numb after being so dissapointed the last 2 attempts. Both times i was really positive and kept telling my self i was pregnant and then when we got the results to confirm otherwise i was crushed. Our 2nd round i even took a weeks annual leave so i could rest and give my body the best chance possible!! Is it better to be positive and think you are preganant or be negative and think the whole time your not pregnant????? Also i was wondering if most people go back to work the day after the transfer?
Any comments would be appreciated x

I think, for your own sanity, sometimes it's better to just carry on as per usual. But it really depends what works best for you.
In all honesty, I don't think your state of mind will have much influence on whether or not the cycles work.
I hope it's third time lucky for you :goodluck:

My first time I was positive it would work and was really upset when it didn't. The next couple I didn't want to let myself get too sure of anything. My husband is of the opinion that positive thinking is the way to go - which gets pretty frustrating when I start feeling things aren't working! I'm (hopefully) having a transfer tomorrow - fingers crossed one thaws ok - and I know that I'm not going to be able to concentrate on anything else for the next two weeks!

Good luck kass, everything is crossed for you :D
Yeah thats what i find, i want to be positive but sometimes the negatives try and take over and i always worry that if im negative the embryo wont except, as stupid as that may sound? My DR said to me that he thinks being positive about it helps the situation but im sick of being so positive and then being even more crushed when it's negative because i talked my self into thinking i was pregnant. And yes the wait to find out if your pregnant is the worst time of all, its always on your mind and i always look out for pregnancy signs, its very hard.
Good luck ladies xx

thanks oneday
I don't think that's stupid - I think it's pretty normal to want to do everything you can to get a positive result - including the urge to being on a positive with the power of your mind! I agree with marcellus, I don't think + or - feelings affect the outcome either way, but it is nicer to spend the wait thinking that there's a chance - and venting when necessary! Good luck!

I'm up to my third ivf cycle and after 2 years and 1 month of trying to conceive, I'm pretty much up to negative. I figure trying to be positive is perhaps not that realistic for me and I'm exhausted enough by the whole process as it is! Am also not sure if the whole trying to be positive thing is just giving myself added pressure, think it makes me feel somehow responsible when it doesn't work. That's the whole frustrating thing about infertility for me, it doesn't matter what I do, positive, negative, eating healthy, exercising, counting days, charting temperatures, weekly accupuncture, herbs, taking medication religiously, trying to relax, none of it works! I'm all for a bit of alternative stuff on the side, but also sort of agree with something I read somewhere by a fertility specialist who said something along the lines of, if ttc was a matter or relaxing/being positive, he'd open a day spa instead of working for an IVF clinic.

I am certainly perserving, but am running out of positive. Am going through the motions, doing everything I can possibly can so that if I get to the end of this without success I am going to let it go knowing that I have done absolutely everything I can think of to make it happen.

Good luck to you! It's hard to stay positive in the face of repeated disappointment and drug fuelled hormones. I hope at the very least, regardless of how you feel you get a positive result soon!

Hi Bea06, Yes thats how im starting to feel i Just dont want to get worked up again to then be crushed! but i still find my self getting a bit excited as the transfer day comes closer, i suppose i kno there is still a high chance of it working and i know with the first cycle because of all the hormones going on from my injections there was a few days where i felt like i had depression again, i felt like it hadn't worked and it was never going to happen, and i hated that feeling all i did was cry and bring my DH down with me. So i guess iv figured the best way for me to get through my cycles is the best way i can, but yes like what the doctor said i also believe if its going to happen it will happen regardless of how your emotions are.
I hope your ok and goodluck with your 3rd round too xx

ME 23 & DH 25

Hello
I think that the very fact that we actually go ahead with the whole ivf process in the first place is because, somewhere maybe in the very depths of our souls, we have some hope & positivity that it may work. the not so positive feelings during the process and during the tww i think is, for me anyway, a protective mechanism - so that if it happens to be a neg result then we might not have as far to fall. I dont really think having particular neg or pos thoughts is going to affect the outcome, but i am a believer that positive thoughts are going to be healthier for you in the long run. I usually sit in the middle, neutral/realist...but try will all my might to lean on the positive side!!
Best of luck to all of you

Hi everyone, just thought I would post this link, I too asked this question not to long ago, here are the answers I got https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...ifference.html

I hope this help some, don't lose hope, wishing you all the very best xx