No 'O's

Hi ladies,

I gave birth to my son nearly 4 months ago and DH and i started DTD again about 8 weeks after. I had a quite bad third degree tear but it healed quite well and i had minimal pain with the stitches. The problem is now that it feels quite different down there, i feel smaller and tighter, plus have extra dangly bits that i think are scar tissue.

Sex has been uncomfortable/painful and i hardly make any natural lubricant any more and have to always use lube (kills the mood when we have to stop in the middle so i can lube up!). I havent orgasmed with penetrative sex and have only managed one or two very mild o's through the use of a vibrator (externally only). I figured it would take a while to get things back on track but its been nearly 3 months now and constantly being on the brink of orgasm during sex but never quite making it is driving me insane!!!!!!!

DH feels bad because he thinks he is hurting me, which it kinda is because im so small now, with little lube and DH is quite large, not to mention the SEXUAL FRUSTRATION!!!!!!!!!!

HELP ME COME!!!! PLEASE!!!!

Well, I don't know that I can actually, er help you...
After an episiotomy it was nearly 7 months before I could dtd without discomfort. Part of it was pyschological - you know, like when you flinch before something you expect to be painful? It always makes it hurt worse. Maybe that's part of your problem.
It's quite normal in the months immediately after birth to be a bit low in natural lube due to suppressed estrogen levels when breastfeeding. that'll sort itself out in the coming months (no pun).
A lot of women report more intense orgasm after having a baby - so that's something to look forward to once you have this sorted. It's still early days yet - give yourself time and keep talking with your DH.

I too had a 3rd degree internal tear and sex was quite painful for me up until DD was about 6/7mths old. After that time things improved dramatically and I felt "normal" again!! My vagina also felt REALLY tight :lol: at first too after having DD and I too had lots of scar tissue which I think has alot to do with it as the scar tissue is forming and settling down alot...... it really is traumatic for your V to go through birth and it really can and does take months to repair itself. I too, needed LOTS of lube initially and also BF doesn't help that either if you are BF that can also play a role with vaginal dryness (nature's way of preventing another baby so soon ;) )

With time, things will go back to normal...... it's still early days.