A girl I went to school with...

...sadly had to say goodbye to her little girl last month. I only just found out :(
We weren't close friends or anything, she was a couple of years younger but we all sat together at lunchtime (we were part of the 'smoker's group' that sat under a tree at the edge of the oval lol), I honestly don't know if she would remember me now but I see her and her kids (she has three) out and about when I'm at the shops all the time.

I really want to message this girl and tell her how sorry I am to hear about her precious little baby's passing. She was about 18 months old, and judging by the pages and pages of photos her proud mama and aunties have posted on their FB pages, the poor sweet bubba never got to go home from hospital :( I'm in tears sitting here writing this, it just breaks my heart :(
I just don't know if a message from me would be welcome, like I said, I don't even know if she remembers me or gives a flying you-know-what about anything I have to say, kwim? I'm just so devastated for her, she's really young (I don't think she's had her 20th birthday yet, I remember her dropping out of school at 14 or 15 when she fell pregnant with her eldest daughter, she also has a little boy who's the youngest, little M who passed away is her middle child) and I just can't imagine what she must have gone through seeing her little girl so sick her whole life, and then not having her to hold in her arms any more :(

What do I say to her? Should I even bother? I just... I don't even know. I'm so sad for her and her family, I had no idea at all :(

Sorry for the rambling.. I'm a bit shocked and so, so sad for this girl :(

I think it would be a lovely gesture for you to let her know you have heard about her teriible news and that it has touched you. I think I would appreciate it anyway if I were in her shoes (and God forbid that ever happens). Maybe a nice card would be something she might like. :hug: it is horrible to hear someone you know is in such pain.

Oh my gosh, how sad :crying: Yes I think a simple message would be appreciated. I'm so saddened to hear this, rest in peace sweet little girl :angel:

It would be a lovely gesture for you to acknowledge the loss of her little girl. I think that is something I would appreciate if I were in her shoes (god forbid). Rest in peace little girl.

Oh, that's so sad :(. I too think that she would appreciate a message from you. I know I'd be touched that someone remembered me and thought of me.

:hug:

:yeahthat:
do you know where she lives. Maybe a card?

I suck at what to say though.

This is really sad. I think it would be nice to send her a card if you have her address or even leave her an email. If you remmber her more then likely she will remmber you.

i did something very similar and YES it was recieved with good intentions, but i kindly warn you she may come to you and lean on you for support even though you both haven't seen or spoken in years, as some people take it on as not just a kind gesture but a different form in offering to help her get through such a heartbreaking journey.

If it was me i would only send a blank card with a beautiful peaceful picture/photo on the front and write your own meaningful but simple words inside the card (and try to place the words about her and/or her DD rather than anything directing towards yourself (hope that makes sense). Even if you don't put a return address or phone number she may well find out, so i would send the card if you are fully prepared to take that chance if you are willing to help if she came to you even through a phone call !!

The way i look at it is it's only a chance she may want to lean on you which is nothing compared to what she has lost.

:heartbeat: Donna you are an extremely compassionate person for reaching out to do such a thing, good on you cause some people would put themselves first and turn away.