Funny things kids say & do

Can you recall a time your child or a friend's child did something totally embarassing / funny or cute? Share it here!

I'll start with something a family friend went through:

We went out camping together, two families, our friends had a toddler who was too young to shower by himself. So mum brough him into the showers (shower block with many showers) and got in. It was pretty quiet, until toddler blurts out, "Mummy, where's your penis?"

Needless to say the block was suddenly alive with giggles.

Another story I heard from a friend of my ex husbands, when the friend invited some guests over to see their new house. They all went through the rooms and came to the spare room. The light was out and no-one could see. Little Miss toddler blurts out, "Gee, it's f&*@#in' dark in here!"

Need I say more?

Next!!!!

Okay me and of course it is to do with me :oops: and mum loves telling everyone !!!!!

When i was young, can't quite remember how young we were at a Giant Trash and Treasure Sale. Of course I had to goto the toilet, so mum takes me and dunno how long time had passed but mum knocks on the cubicle door and asks if I am okay. In a great big loud voice I yell out "Mum my poo is stuck" :oops: :oops: Poor Mum and like I said she has never let me forget it.

Love

When i was 3 my mum took me shopping and as we were walking around the shoping centre a man walked past with a trolley full of beer and wine, so in my loudest voice i sad "mum look that man is an alcoholic" apparently the man gave my mum an awful look and she turned scarlet.

when I was little, I decided it would be funny to put all of my hair and i mean all of it in pegs.. mum of course had to take a photo and to this day she threatens to put it in the papr for my 21st !1 arrgh its my 21st in 18 days!! I hope she forgets!!

Joshua also has done something very emabrrasing, when I was still in england I took him into town and he insisted he had to walk he was about 14 months old.. I had the umbrella with us as it was looking like rain, so joshua decided that he absoltuly had to drag the umbrella behind him and then sometimes in front of him and was walking so very slow coz it kept getting stuck in the little cracks in the pavement.. so I took it away.. and boy was that the wrong thing to do.. he screamed, it was his first tantrum and being ym first child i had no idea what to do except not give it back and let him have his way.. everyone was staring at me.. some even laughing, it was probly ovbvious that it was my first time dealing with it.. he was screaming and lying on the pavement rolling around and kicking it was awful.. even when i tried to give it back or give him a chocolate hed still scream.. after about an hour of sitting there not having the faintest idea of what to do he stopped and gave me a cuddle.. I was soo embarresed though.. i had no idea what to do and i was certainly not expecting a 14mth/15 month old baby to do that!! :rolleyes:

Okay - not going to embarrass myself so DH will do.

MIL had this huge dinner party when he was about 4 years old. She was running for council election and there were some influential people at the party. Laz kept trying to get his mums attention, and she kept ignoring him (of course! - sorry if you knew her you would understand!) Anyway this went on for an hour, and Laz was getting pretty impatient and annoyed he was being ignored, so he walked up to his mums seat extended his arms placed both hands on her boobs and went "ehh ehh"squeezing her boobs and ran off and locked himself in the bathroom. - Well he definatelyy got her attention - and everyone else at the partys as well - LOL - I would so have loved to be there.
He was so scared of his mum having chased him down the hall telling him he better not dare come out of the bathroom - that he spent the whole night in there in the dark too afraid to make a sound.

Love Jen

My Mum's best friend has a DD that i could fill this whole forum on her stories but my fav one is this-

At kindergarten they were going through the letters of the alphabet and they had gone through a few at random and then they got to B. The kinder lady says 'everyone lets think of some words that start with B.' They all say Ball and Bat and Bug etc, and it is her turn and she says B is for Daddy. The Kinder lasy says no sweetie D is for Daddy. No, (very annoyed face) B is for Daddy. Kinder lady draws a D and a B and shows how B is in fact not for Daddy. DD then says- "Oh for f**k's sake why dont you understand me, I know what I am talking about- B is for f**kin' Daddy okay!!!!!!!" and she storms off to go play outside. Apparently because she has a face full of expression she left shaking her head and all the kinder staff lost it. When her Mum asked her Why exactly B is for Daddy (she told her off for swearing too obviously!) she said Daddy's name is Bill isn't it so B is for Daddy- why is this hard to understand!!!
Seriously she is like a 25 year old in a 5 year old's body.

Last week her Mum said- Go and get dressed for school. DD replies with- I am so sick of you telling me what to do every minute of the day. You tell me what to do in the morning, after lunch, when i come home, before i go to bed, cant you just give me a break? to which her Mum just lost it. She is a beautiful but very cheeky girl!

Ooooh boy, Ris certainly does make me laugh so hard sometimes it's embarassing. She's done a few funny things this week (mainly grose so be warned!) that just cracked me up and I had to share.

I was having a meeting one night this week with some new bookkeepers (they are a couple with their own business), getting to meet them and they were doing their spiel... anyway, Ris was sitting with John and they were facing us. I noticed Ris picking at John, I thought she was picking fluff from his jumper. She started poking at his throat, it got to the point where I thought she had to be doing something other than poking as she was totally fixed on what she was doing (mother's intuition LOL). I burst into a fit of laughter as I noticed (hope you aren't eating now...!) Marisa was wiping boogers on John's neck and poking it! It was sooooo grose but I couldn't contain the laughter. The poor bookkeepers were trying so hard to keep it in. I tried telling John but he didn't get me until I told him a few times. The flu is going around here so it wasn't a pretty sight!

If that wasn't enough, (this is all 100% true, I couldn't believe it myself!) five minutes later she jumps on my lap and lets out a burp, another five minutes later she bottom burps on my lap! Her poor system must be in a state of chaos!!! She was a bit embarassed though with the last one but I was just stunned. Poor thing, outclassing daddy even!

ANOTHER thing she did/does, courtesy of my darling sister who taught her that cats poo in holes they dig and then they bury it (and why don't you try that Marisa?). She now pretends to dig holes and poo in them #-o My sister even told her to poo on my foot, so she sits on your foot and says she's pooing on your foot, and even other objects like balls and balloons, candles (don't ask). ArgggGgh *mental note: gotta kill my sister!*

She is soooo shy and will be deadly quiet when anyone strange is about and she also is a very petite little thing with big blue eyes, you just wouldn't expect this sort of thing!!! Ironically she is one to sit on my knee, pass wind and think it is hilarious. She says, '1-2-3 - FART!' and gives a good squeeze. She loves it. Argggh I guess it's a guys way of bonding with kids, teach them the good stuff hey?! LOL

Roflmao Kelly !!! Marisa do something like that ?!?!? Noooooo don't believe it for a minute LMAO !!! I could just picture it too.


God I am loving this age so much (cept the tantrums now and then)

Kameron is loving watching the Olympics on TV. The other day we were watching the gymnastics where they were doing their floor routine. A guy started (how they stand straight with arms in air before starting) I catch Kameron out of the corner of my eye and he is doign the exact same thing. When the gymnast got into his routine Kameron was rolling around the floor trying to do somersaults. The gymnast then did a handstand so Kameron put his hands on the floor placed his head between his hands and stuck 1 leg up in the air. At the end of the routine the guy got up and stood with legs together with 1 arm in air. Yep Kameron followed suit. The gymnast waved to the camera and blew kisses. Of course Kameron had to wave and blow kisses back LMAO.

This morning our dog was barking at everyone and everything. I said "Kayla put a sock in it will you" Kameron said "Kayla put your socks on will you" I couldn't help but laugh.

Love

I had to laugh, my friend recently got a puppy and we went to her house. My 2 yr old had a wonderful time and was chasing the dog around the back yard. The dog had a tennis ball in its mouth and is still learning to drop the ball on command. Eventually the dog dropped the ball and my daughter picks up the ball and runs off with it, much to the dogs suprise!

Later we were inside the house and Olivia decided to sit down on the floor. Angel came up to her and started barking so what does Olivia do? Why bark back of course!
It was very cute, I just wish I had my video camera with me at the time!

Susan :D

LOL at Olivia. Kameron quite often things he is dog right down to lapping at the dog water and squatting in the back yard to pee cause "Kayla does"

Love

Jack has been taking to sitting on the edge of his cot and sticking his arms and legs out through the bars while calling MUMMMMM. It's so funny, it looks like he is in jail!

Jo

Had to laugh at Kameron this morning.

He was playing with a 9ltr bucket and had it on his head being silly. I asked him if he needed to goto the toilet, so he crawls with the bucket on his head all the way to the toilet, stands up still with bucket on head, pulls his pants down and sits down on his potty to pee all with the bucket on his head. When he finished he stood up and pulled his pants up and told me to flush. He then proceeded to crawl back to the lounge room with the bucket still on his head. How he never ran into anything is beyond me he even went around where his toys were located.

Love

Kameron had some bread and as he got to the end of it he started throwing it at Lachlan saying "here duck" It was hard to tell him off and try not to laugh at the same time.

Love

LMAO Cailin.

Paris must have good hearing cause we have watched it quite a few times and never heard him say it LOL. Hopefully he doesn't say it every episode cause we have bob the builder that we are giving kam for xmas too LOL

At least rooted is better than what Kameron says thanks to Daddy.

Love

Yeah I think Bob was the first person to come to mind LOL! But its not something that we say so it was quite strange...oh well better than the other version LOL! Then I think I would have had a heart attack..."whats that dear you like ducks...Ohhhh you want to see the fire Truck" Thats what we did with our neice got her all confused until she thought she wasn't actually saying a real word. It worked too ;)

And I love it when you tell them not to say a certain word coz it doesn't sound nice so they come and tell you about 50+ times that you shouldn't say that certain word coz its not nice... *sigh* the innocence of childhood...or maybe not so innocent :-s

*hugs*
Cailin

You saying "ducks" reminded me of something Sean used to say,
If you asked him "What does a duck say" he would say "wa*k, w*nk"!!!!!
His version of Quack Quack!

hrm maybe i should try the duck thing, although Lachlan might have bread thrown at him again #-o

Love

Now I have found out what it means here. I think they should change the saying on the show.

But it means in the UK.
rooted to the spot
to be unable to move:
She was rooted to the spot with fear/amazement.

So yes he would be saying it.