Poor baby girl had to have an enema today :(

My DD 1 has always had a problem with her bowel movements she always cries when she poos this has gone on for months. I have had her to the doc who just gave her coloxyl drops which did nothing, I have changed her formula helped but then we were back to hard poo and lots of tearful pushing. I then changed her formula again which has helped her stools are a lot softer but she still really cries and becomes very distressed when she has to go. I feed her lots of fruit and bowel friendly foods. Today after a bowel movement she was very swollen and inflamed in the bottom and extremely distressed, sorry if tmi but it looked like a little caterpillar sitting between her vagina and her anus. After a trip to the doctor who had "Never seen anything like it" he sent us to the childrens hospital. Long story short she has a huge skin tag which has popped out today, she obviously has torn quite badly previously and that has healed but now the skin between the skin tag and her anus has split and she is left with an extremely angry looking and very painful bottom. She was given an enema to flush out her bowels and I now have to give her Parachoc everyday for 4 months to keep her poos soft and "Porridge like" as described by the ped to train her that it is ok to poo and that it isnt going to hurt her as she was keeping it in as it was a painful process for her. I just feel so awful that I havent done something more for her I didnt realise that she had this problem to this extent she poos everyday she cries about it but once its over its over iykwim. I feel like the worst mother in the world :(

:( I'm so sorry for your DD, but this is NOT your fault :hug:

Thanks Sally but its so hard not to feel guilty about it iykwim

:hug: Don't beat yourself up. You did the right thing and had her to the Drs like any concerned Mummy. You now have a plan of attack to follow and I am sure things will improve from here. I hope your precious poppet is healed up soon and gets over her fear quickly. Sounds like lots of cuddles and kisses might be in order for the both of you Xx

Oh you poor things. Can I ask how old your DD is?

I went through a terrible time with constipation with my DD when she was about 18 months and traipsed back and forth to doctors looking for answers. I kept getting the same answer - sluggish bowels, up her fibre, water, laxatives etc but I was so sure it must be something else. Like you, DD's diet was great and no amount of pear, prune, fiber water, fresh fruit and veg made an ounce of difference. Like you I also found temporary relief from laxatives but we went back to the same problem when we stopped using them. Finally after 6 months of this I found a GP who admitted she wasn't a peadiatric gastrointestinal expert (and why would any GP be?) and referred me to a pead at the hospital. Like you, my DD was put on Parachoc for a long time (6 months) with the explaination that it was not diet but a 'psychological' trauma from the pain of constipation once off which has led her to want to avoid doing a poo. The theory was that by making the bowel movement easy for an extended time, she will get over the mental link of poo = pain and go on to have normal bowel movements.

The reason I am telling you this is that I understand your pain only too well. To be thinking that you play a part in your child's constipation due to diet. To watch them in pain... It is just heart breaking and my heart goes out to you and your daughter. I can't tell you the relief I felt when the paed explained what was going on with DD - more than garden variety constipation as we understand it in adults. I was so relieved it was not my doing. I hope you can find that relief to, because it is not your fault. There is such a lack of information out there about children's constipation and they are treated like miniature adults when they do not work that way in a 'bowel movement' sense ;) I am so glad you have finally found good advice and let me tell you, it will improve. I am finally at the end of the 6 month parachoc administration and my DD is now passing poo without incident :leap: I am now weaning her off it slowly, we are at 5ml every 2 days now :) and I am so happy to have it working.

Well done on getting to the bottom of it for your DD, I am truely sorry for you both that it had to get to such a state before you found your answers. Just remember to be super vigilant about having the parachoc as forgetting for one day can harden the stools temporarily and cause a setback for your DD. It will work out in the end. :hug:

Palmer had pretty bad constipation too and some tearing but not as bad as your poor thing.

You have done nothing wrong. You can't help other people's poo...for some reason, this is what her body did, and it's nobody's fault.

However, I have heard very good things about parachoc.

Poor little thing, but as the others have said you cant blame yourself. At least you know whats going on now and how it can be treated.

Thank you so much girls

OMG Jackrose it is almost identical to my DD she has just turned 1 and that is exactly what the doc said that we have to train her brain that poo is her friend lol. It is comforting to know that it does work and that someone else has been through the same thing, thank you.

She took the Parachoc willingly this morning it is like melted ice cream, I would have given it to her sooner but the box said not for under 2 years old but the doc said it is fine it is just a precaution.

Yayyyyyy I see light at the end of the poo tunnel...thank goodness it has been a long tunnel......thanks again girls

I completely understand your relief at the light at the end of the tunnel :hug: At 12 months, she will most likely bounce back after this little set back once the parachoc has worked its magic and it will only remain a memory for you.

My pead also gave advice that the warnings on the box were general precautions. If you have advice from a doctor, you can safely go ahead, but for general use (ie in situations of transient constipation it is best to remain cautious as there are alternative treatment options).

I was given a whole different set of guidelines rather than those on the box (which I don't think it is right to go into here as I am not a doctor or a specialist) but if you want to chat and compare notes, feel free to pm me :).

You will honestly notice a change right away and peace will descend! I am still enjoying my DD passing easy poo!