VENT- My family just sucks.
DH and I have recently moved 800km away from my family in Sydney, to the outback. It is for 4yrs only and then we will move back to the east coast, closer to family. Last night I was on the phone to my mum, just for a chat and she told me my brother was going to be having a holiday with his family (wife and 2 kids) on a house boat with friends over christmas (actually over christmas too, not just during the holidays). How wonderful for him, you say? Well, yes, that is lovely. Except that when we moved out ehre 7mths ago he told me that he and his family would come out here to see us over the chrissy holidays. But then when we were visiting Sydney in august he told me he couldn't afford the trip out here and wouldn't be comeing, and wouldn't be doing anything.
Whilst it is a long drive to get out here (about 7-8hrs) and I know petrol isn't cheap, surely coming here wouldn't cost half as much as a house boat for 2wks?! He would stay with us at our home. His kids are 6 and almost 10, they could do the drive in a day. Just fill an esky with some munchies and off they go. We have done the drive in a day with two kids and me being (at the time)28wks pg.
I'm so upset over this. I had a rant to my mum and I think I upset her. I know it's not her fault and I didn't mean to whine to her, but I really am just so sad that my bro has totally fobbed us off. He was so adamant they were coming and if anyone were to come out here, i truely thought it would be him. I am so disappointed. Mum said she was planning on coming out here, but has been suffereing with bad anxietly and depression and never takes a second though to tell me it all started when I left Sydeny and that she could never leave her family 'like that' and she would just miss her mum too much and would go nuts being all alone in the middle of nowhere. I highly doubt she will ever make it out here. I could almost hear her thinking 'Well YOU moved out there, what do you expect?'. Well, I expected some support. Some understanding thet DH and I are trying to do waht's best for us and our children. Noone else will come to see us. It makes me so sad. I feel so alone.
I have been awake half the night thinking about it all. And also thinking how mum and my bro in particular, always say how much family means to them. How important it is. Yep, obviously. I was trying to remember good times, the most memorable times, when I really did feel important, a priority to them. But I had so much trouble doing it. I'm so sad about this. They will help financially when they can, which is wonderful. But I dont want money. I want time. Experiences, being a priority to them and feeling loved. I would leave all the gifts and money behind if I felt like I meant the world to them and taht they would drop everything to be here for me. But I knwo they wouldn't. They won't. All I have is DH and my babies. And I am so sad about that.
