Think I am going to have to get rid of one of my kitties :( And ideas?

Ive been having so many problems with our youngest cat, Jasper, who is about 3 I think. I have three boys, they always got on so well, slept together etc but since I have moved house in April last year, he's been getting increasingly aggressive with them.

He wanders ALOT to the neighbours house and wont come home, he is now overweight and I have told them to stop feeding him to no end, but he's not the cat he used to be, he's huge and they think that is normal for a cat. So I have been keeping him inside as much as I can to get him to stay here.

When he is inside with the other two, the first thing he does is look for them and launch onto them and fight them, like right away, the other two run and hide from him.

I dont know why he's started doing this? The other two are at peace with each other and don't cause a problem but clearly Jasper has some major issues :(

Do the neighbours have a cat themselves? I wonder if him being the 'top cat' over at the neighbours is causing hierarchy problems when he comes home - as in, he's seeking out the other cats to assert his dominance, because he's getting extra attention lavished on him elsewhere. Perhaps they would like to adopt him?

Are they all neutered?

Has he been desexed? Could be his male hormones starting to rage if he is still "all boy".

Kell, there is a pheramone you can get from vets called Feliway, you can get a plug in, and that way they can relax a bit. You can also buy it in a spray and spray the other cats... that way they are a point of relaxation for him.

If he's put on a lot of weight, there could be an issue like thyroid that is going on. Often thyroid issues can cause weight gain and behavioural changes. Its worth getting checked.... HTH

Wow that sounds interesting Christy, might give it a go. Yes they are all desexed, and the crap they are feeding him is making him fat - he was very healthy before he used to go there. They have one cat, and he treats their house like his own, sleeps in their cats home by their front door and everything. Im just tired of bloody repeating myself to the neighbour that even the vet has told me he is overweight and they SHOULD NOT feed him. Its a guy living with his mother and when I went over there once (he'd been missing for several days), she went on and on about seeing him so skinny and worrying he was going to die and he looked terrible... I was worried out of my brain, but when I found him the next day, he was overweight as usual and I couldnt understand what she was going on about. She has a massively fat cat and thinks its normal. I dont think she is listening to me and thinks I neglect him.

wow - that's a hard spot to be in. If he is used to roaming - then being kept at home is likely the major contributor towards his anti-social behaviour. (my male cat gets like that when he is kept home). It seems a shame to have to give him away just because someone else if feeding him though (although I certainly understand your concerns regarding his health). Could you possibly tell them a white lie and tell your neighbour that he is really a sick cat (cat aids or something) and that he can only eat the special 'perscription' cat food you get from the vet? They might take you more seriously if you are concerned about something more then just being 'overweight' - IYKWIM. Otherwise, have you got the room to install a cat run in the backyard - you wouldn't have to use it all the time, you could let him roam occaisionally, but have him in the run more often then roaming to give him a chance to stick to his 'diet' and yet still have an area to play outside.

He seems to stay home more when he's inside ironically, sometimes I let him out and he is back hours later... but its just hard work keeping him in and keeping an eye on him, kitty litter etc on top of normal stuff. I did tell the neighbour that he was on a diet and not to feed him but he's not losing weight... like you say, so tricky....

Kelly - regarding the Feliway, try eBay as it is quite pricey. My vet was charging over $100 for the diffuser with 1 refill, I got it on eBay for under $70 from Mammoth Pet Supplies.
One of my cats got freaked out when we took DD away at xmas (she's very maternal!) so we're using Feliway to calm her down :)
ETA - we also have the spray version and it says NOT to spray it on cats directly as it's alcohol based - so it's for spraying on furniture etc

Thanks for the tip! x