Please help -- at my wits end

Hi all, hoping you wise people will be able to give me some advice here, PLEASE!

My DD will be three in 2 months and we've been "toilet training" for about 5 months.

The first few days back in November were bad but I really thought she got the hang of it by the third day. Things went ok for the next two months and while we were traveling for two weeks we kept her in nappies a lot but she would tell us whenever she needed to use the potty.

Since we returned home from traveling over two months ago, she just wees everywhere all the time. Occasionally she takes herself to the toilet to wee but more often than not it starts on the floor and she'll then hold it to go and do the rest on the toilet, which tells me she has the muscle control thing down pat. She has no toilet phobia or anything, I'm quite sure she actually does like using the toilet. She gets every poo in the toilet btw the prob is just with wees. We had two great days last week where she took herself and had no accidents but then it all went downhiill again.

I feel like we've tried everything,
-she's left nappy free every moment of the day that she is awake
-we stay home a lot just to try and get this sorted
-tried rewards/bribes
-given so much praise
-tried reminding her often
-tried physically carrying her to the toilet, she'll say no I don't need to then wee all over the floor seconds later

I'm so confused and feel like such a failure. I don't have a clue what I'm doing. I keep hoping it's just one of those things, you know, she'll get it eventually but this seems to be a very long time with no marked improvement and honestly I'm so sick of clening up wee :(

Any help or criticism appreciated.

TIA

This is what I did..

when i started I would take them with me and make a joke out of the sound of my wee hitting the water.. Gross yes but hey its your kid :)

for poops I would empty the nappy into the toilet and we would giggle about the plopping sound it made

then I would talk about how much fun it would be if they could make those noises too.. then we would sing silly little toilet songs and some pretty gross ones.. Bit IMO it made for a very relaxing time.

I found DD so hard to get out of nappies. you aren't a failure she is just taking her time to get it :) Maybe pop her back in nappies for a couple of weeks to give you both a break and then in about a weeks time start talking about it again but not excessively. like when you are cooking dinner, washing up or whatever.. just bring up the whole no nappy thing and how she is a big girl now yada yada..

then maybe one morning say how would you like to try getting rid of those yucky smelly nappies today? Lets try the toilet this morning and see how you go.. Maybe pop a nappy back on and every 15-20 mins take the nappy off and take her to the toilet

Are you using a potty or the toilet? Personally my boys hated the potty but DD didn't like the toilet and wasn't that fussed on a potty so we put a potty next tot he toilet as well as a toddler toilet seat so she could choose which one she wanted..

Good Luck.. I hope she gets is soon for you..

With dd I found having a 'set' toilet opportunity has helped (but we're having poo issues atm)...so before we leave the house I always do a wee and then encourage her to. It's not a choice...she has to at least try, and I then tell her to relax etc. She then empties her bladder...sometimes it's only a drop but she can feel what to do and I feel reassured. If she won't sit on the toilet, I then say 'oh well we'll have to stay home' or 'ok let me know when you are ready so we can go' which seems to do the trick.

Again lots of opportunities when we're out seems to help - toilets seem to be interesting places for a 2 year old.

We are having our own issues though in that dd never tells me when she needs to go, so poos are always hit and miss (ie I have to catch her about to go...she gets a look). She also does the 'start to wee and then run to the toilet' thing.

So I'm not sure I'm any help, but more structure might help save you some cleaning.

:hug: you're not a failure! It's a process!