M/c late first tri what can I expect to occur?

Hi, I've just discovered that we've lost our baby in the last day or two. One day it was kicking around waving at us on the tv and then the next scan it was still. It is around 13-14 weeks and was given a very high risk of trisomy 18 so in some ways its easier to loose early. Lots of mixed feelings right now.

I wanted to see what other people would recommend in terms of going natural or hospital for a m/c at this stage. I want to take my time to let it sink in before I make a decision but I have no idea what either would be like.

One element that terrifies me is how a D & C is then 'handled' but I guess our priorities are physical/ future pregnancy health first, then mental effects of seeing or not seeing the baby then the spiritual/ ethical.

Thankyou so much in advance for any replies.

I'm sorry I have no advice, but I wanted to offer you a big :hug: so sorry for your loss

Firstly I'm so sorry for your loss :hug:

I've had both D&C's and natural m/c's.

If you're 13-14wks what will come out might be very confronting. For me I would go with the D&C. Mine were always handled very well.

I'm so sorry for your loss, I know how you are feeling at the moment unfortunately. I had a miscarriage recently at 15 weeks and my obs said past 12 weeks they will generally induce you using mysoprostol tablets which is the process that we went through. He said that it is better to induce at this stage as a d&c is not so good for the cervix as the baby is bigger, it may put you a risk of cervical incompetence in future pregnancies. After the baby was delivered the placenta didn't come away (which is quite common as at this stage) and I had to have a general to have the placenta removed. I would talk to my health care provider and take their advice on what is best for you and then make your decision. I know there is a lot of emotions running through you at the moment, and decisions to make, take your time, it is your body.

As for deciding whether or not to see they baby, you really don't need to make that decision until the time comes. If you say you are not sure the midwives will be very reassuring. We thought we would like to see baby and went by the advice of the midwife, I was worried about what state the baby might be in and didn't want to see if it would have been distressing, as it turns out it looked as though the baby had passed only in the last day or so and we were able to see baby and hold her. I have to say that everyone at the hospital was fantastic, and very understanding, it is such a difficult time.

Once again I'm so sorry for your loss and wish you peace with your decisions. :hug:

I'm so sorry for your loss! What an awful path you are now on. My heart goes out to you!

i am soooooooooo sorry for your loss!! far out, you poor thing :hug: no real advice, when i had my m/c, mine was natural, i started bleeding and went to the hospital and they told me i had lost the baby, i just had to let it run its course, i didnt need a d&c.....hopefully someone else can give you some advice that will help. im so sorry xoxox