Some questions, if that's okay.

Hi everyone,

I started miscarrying on Sunday at 6 and a half weeks. My sac measured 5 weeks in the u/s I had yesterday. I'm struggling a bit, which I'm sure is natural but I have a few questions.

For those of you who have other kids, how did you tell them? I've managed not to say anything yet because I need to heal a bit before I can deal with their grief - they're going to be devastated. My own fault, I know - I shouldn't have said anything until I reached the 12 week mark.

How long can I expect to bleed for? It was very light Sunday and yesterday with minimal pain, but now the bleeding is very heavy and the pain is off and on. When it's on, it's pretty bad.

How soon can I try again? I have heard it's better to let a full cycle pass, but unless there's a good medical reason for it I'd rather try straight away. I didn't have a D&C.


Thanks in advance for your help.

:hug: Han, I'm so sorry.

In regards to telling the other kids, you weren't silly at all. Funnily enough my DD told me last time before I could tell her, but I'm not sure there's any great way to say that our baby just couldn't stay with us.

My last one was around the same time and I bled for roughly 7 days.

I have tried straight after all of mine. Had success but only one birth. I remember one doc saying to me it's more about your heart, as your body will only conceive when it's ready and able.

:hug: again.

I'm so sorry you lost your baby. I can't remember how long I bled for, my M/C was 10yrs ago, but I also think it depends if you have a D&C or not which you said you didn't which is great.. I don't see a problem in trying again straight away once the bleeding has stopped. :hug:

firstly im so sorry :hug: i had my m/c at 7 weeks, and had it natural as well, i didn't need a d&c. im not too sure how long i bled for....maybe 1 week or 2 weeks? im pretty sure i got my AF back around 4-5weeks.....my doctor also said at the time that we could start trying straight away if we wanted, we didnt need to wait a few cycles or anything....

in regards to telling your kids, how old are they? i know when I lost J, we told my kids that he was sick, and he went to sleep and didn't wake up. That was the easiest way for them to understand....maybe you could say something similar? that the baby was sick and couldn't stay.....:dunno: whatever is easiest for them to understand.

thinking of you and your family xoxox

I'm so sorry for your loss. I have had all natural m/c and swith my last I think I bled roughly for approx. 1 week. I was just over 5w pg.

As for telling your children, I would be honest and tell them that bubs couldn't stay on this earth.

Depending on if you have religious beliefs or not you might want to express that bubs left earth to be in heaven with God or take a different approach like baby is with angels etc....

Of all the times I m/c, we tried as soon as I was mentally ready b/c physically it was like a heavy period with my m/c. I think I have had the most success ttc after waiting one cycle.

Sweetie I am so sorry this had happened to you. I was hoping when I read your post on Sunday that it wouldn't be a mc, i was actually miscarrying myself whilst replying to you, I ended up in ED with morphine in my drip as the pain was making me pass out.
My last natural mc was a bit of cramping and bleeding for 2 days, this time again natural after ob was able to move the sac from my cervix where it was stuck (hence the pain) I have very heavy bleeding still. I really think everytime and everyone is different, the ob did tell me that if pain comes back or bleeding starts soaking pads every few hours to call or go back to ED. Can I suggest that this would be the same for you?
As for your little ones, i think the idea of telling them the baby is an angel and in heaven etc would be easier for them to understand :)
Please feel free to pm me if you want or need to chat more as we are going through the same thing at the same time xxx

I'm so sorry to hear your news :( I don't think it was silly of you to tell your children early on. What you tell them now will probably depend on your beliefs. When my baby passed away we hadn't told anyone yet because we only found out when we came home from our honeymoon, so hadn't really had a chance to tell people yet. In my heart I like to believe that the little soul that would have been my first baby, is now my little boy. The first little baby body I created wasn't perfect, so the little soul waited until I had created a perfect little body for it to inhabit.

That early in pregnancy im not sure how long you will bleed for , hopefully someone else can answer that. my m/c I bled for 7 weeks and ended up needing a d&c.

You will probably pass a sac, if you havent already and from there the bleeding should slow down... Im so sorry for your loss, especially when you have the children to now explain it to. DS was only young but still knew there was a baby, but i didnt say anything other than mummys really sick and i need to rest...

you have to wait a cycle ,most likely anyway as by the time the bleeding stops, your cycle will change.... best of luck for the future, good to know you are ready to try again :)

I'm so sorry that you have to even be asking these questions :hug:

Once my m/c started I bled for at least 10 days. The first 4 were the most and then it started to taper off.

My GP recommended having at least 1 cycle before TTC again, he did have a reason for it but I wasn't anywhere near ready to even be thinking about it at the time.

:hug:

I am so sorry for your loss hun :(
I m/c about 3 ths after #6 was born...I was about 6 weeks.
I also passed it naturally and I bleed for about a week but only had a few days that were really heavy and painful.
I passed some large clots.
The pregnancy was an 'accident' so we didn't try straight away but we did fall a couple of months after...I beleive my lost LO looked after my DS in the NICU
I agree with saying something like our baby had to go be with the angles or had to go to heaven.
:hug:

Thank you so much for your support. I know it must be difficult to talk about your own losses, so I really appreciate it.

I've told my oldest daughter - she's 14, so is old enough to understand. My youngest who's 4 keeps rubbing my stomach and asking if I have a 'stummy' ache. I'll talk to them about it today.

In regards to trying again, I think we'll probably just let things go naturally and see what happens. While I'd love to have another baby, I know I'll spend the pregnancy worrying if this will happen again and I'm not sure I can cope with that.

Our case is different and my kids are too young to understand but we told my 6 year old sister Sophie couldnt stay with us but she would always be there with us.

Hannanat - I'm so sorry darl, I know the words can't really help much, but please know I'm thinking of you xxx

I lost all 6 of my angels between 4wk 2d and 8wks, I bled for 7-10 days, and it usually took me at least 6 months to fall pregnant again (except for my last 2 losses which only had 1 full cycle between them, and then it only took a little under 4 months for our DD to be conceived).

Sending you lots of hugs and support!

so sorry for your and your familys loss!