Doesn't want to sleep in her bed

Ok, I am just about fed up with DD1 who is 3.4 years old. DH is just as much to blame for her bad sleeping pattern by having her go to sleep on his lap while they watch TV and then he puts her in her bed but lately she has been waking up around 11.30pm screaming the house down because she wants to sleep in Daddy's bed (I have given up most nights and gone to sleep in her bed). Last night I put my foot down and thankfully so did DH. She had a massive screaming tantrum for about 30 minutes before DH gave up and slept in her bed and she went in to have a cuddle. He came out about 2.30am and DD1 came into our bed around 7am. This can't go on and I don't know what to do. I have told DH that she has to go to sleep in her bed at a reasonable time but he doesn't listen and is too soft with her. When he went away for a week I had her sleeping in her own bed well before she normally goes to sleep but as soon as he came back she changed back into the old pattern. The screaming tantrum drives us insane as she isn't normally like that. I know that DH has to lead the way by putting her to bed and putting her back in there when she gets out but I don't see him doing that. She hits and screams at me if I try and do it.

So any suggestions on what will work?

My DS is 3yrs old. We have just got him to start going to sleep in his bed by himself, but he does have thomas on while he goes to sleep. It was a long process. The first thing we did was getting him to lay down instead if sitting on my lap, we put a mattress on the lounge room floor, first I had to sit down on the floor and hold his hard, then I was able to just sit on the lounge, after a while we just moved him to his room and DH or I sat beside the bed. In the last week he has started to go to sleep without us in there. He still comes into our bed during the night/morning but we don't say anything about it. we just try to keep sleep/bedtime as stressless as possible. I have found if DH or I are stressed or angry at bedtime he won't go into his bed, he wants to sleep on me. I don't know if this helps any but good luck.

Thanks Yowie. I think it is going to be a painful process to get her to go to her bed before she falls asleep on DH's lap in the evening. The last few nights DH has been getting up to her and putting her back in her bed and he is trashed. I am glad as I have been up and down for months with the girls so he knows how disruptive it is for me too. She used to be so well sleep trained before DD2 sigh.

Maybe we need to get a king sized bed :)