Contraception - do you bother? (for LTTTCers)

Hi girls,

For those of you who have completed their families or who are in between babies, do you use contraception? Or is the thought of a 'miracle/surprise' bub ok for you and you would be happy if you had a natural pregnancy?

I ask because my DS2 is now 16 months. I always wanted more than 2 kids, but i also didn't think i'd be having babies in my mid-30's. DH and I both have fertility issues, but we aren't completely infertile (i.e. there could be one in a gazillion chance that a sperm and an egg might just do what nature intended).

I'm not sure what to do contraception-wise. I loathe the OCP and it does awful things to me. I don't think we are ready for DH to have a vasectomy.

Any stories/advice welcome. I want to know what everyone else is thinking or doing.

Hi Lenny,

After DD was born I went on the contraceptive pill for a few months (maybe 4?) then stopped. Up until DD turned 1, we were 'careful' not to fall pg but after then we have been TTC # 2 ever since and haven't been using contraceptive. I guess atm we are considered as not trying/not preventing b/c we are waiting to start IVF in a couple of months. If we are fortunate enough to fall pg without AC I'd be very surprised/shocked since I haven't been able to fall pg since last year in July and that is doing Clomid and IUI. Our infertility is classed as 'secondary' infertility.

I guess you need to weigh up if you were to have a 'surprise' whether that would be an issue & if not then I wouldn't bother with contraception until the time you know for sure that you don't want to add anymore children to your family.

I think we're so infertile that natural conception is absolutely, completely impossible. But I'm still on the pill.

So many reasons for it - scary arthritis meds where pregnancy is strongly advised against, and termination is recommended if you do fall pregnant. The fact that my PCOS is so wonky that I have absolutely no cycle what so ever, so having the control and knowledge of AF's arrival really does make life easier.

That said... if you take my health issues out of the equation, I likely wouldn't bother. Then again, I suspect that the thoughts of "am I pregnant?" coupled with no idea of when AF *should* arrive would likely do my head in!

When I was having issues with the pill, it was suggested that I try the mirena IUD, would something like that be more appealing than the OCP?

BW

We have been given a 1 in about 5 million chance of becoming pregnant naturally, I haven't been on any contraception since I was 19.

We TTC #1 for 5 years and were given a 1% chance of conceiving naturally. We did twice. Going back on the pill was not an option for me, however we do use contraceptives. I had an awful pregnancy and am terrified to have another. Had I been well during pregnancy I dont think we would be as 'careful' as we are now.

Lenny luv you have to ask yourself the question, If I fell pregnant how would I feel.

For me the answer would be OMG this is the worst thing that could happen. So the answer to my question is no matter the likelyhood that it is impossible we still use contraception every time. For me the OCP is not an option so it is condoms all the way.

DH is going to get the snip, but has been a little busy to fit it in at the moment.

So think about your answer to the question and take the contraception issue from there.

Although I'm still pregnant, I guess I can speak for later. We TTC'ed for two years and had a 3% chance of conceiving naturally. We had a few miscarriages, so we did conceive, but due to DF's sperm condition none of those pregnancies ever had a chance of taking. So yes, we will use contraception, something non hormone based, tbh it will probably just be condoms as I don't want to hormonally mess with my already fragile reproductive system. Although there is a small chance we may fall, there is a large chance the pregnancy will not be viable and I can't go through that again.

We don't bother, but we would still like more. I wouldn't like to have a small age gap, but breastfeeding seems to be a fairly effective contraceptive anyway, so I'm not worrying out it. And a natural pregnancy would be awesome.

We don't bother, we want more children anyway (I had a really easy pregnancy and we have no health concerns, it's just the getting pregnant that's the problem) so a natural pregnancy would be a very welcome surprise, not to mention an added boost to our finances!

Given there is no chance we will fall pregnant naturally, no I don't bother with contraception. And, ridiculously, my cycle is better than it has ever been (although AF is heavier). Ironic huh?

We don't bother. My tubes are so blocked that they might as well not be there. The chances of anything happening are very slim.

We're not sure we'll be having any more, but if it happened naturally and I was one of "those women" (haha, you know the ones we hear about falling pregnant after IVF) then we'd be quite happy :)

Thanks everyone for your contributions and ideas.

We both aren't sure where we stand on more kids. I think we both would feel incredibly lucky and happy if we got a surprise baby.

I might go to the doc and discuss options that aren't OCP.

Lenny could you try natural fertility management? You know, like charting and stuff so that you don't conceive? I mean, I know it isn't fool proof but it might be better than horrible OCP or whatever other things the Dr might offer you? And again, if a natural pregnancy happened, then it's meant to be? I think that this is the way that we'll go with things when (and IF) I ever get my period back (no sign of AF yet!!)

Just a thought. :)

Once I get these 2 little buns out we know that we don't want any more babies - I'm just way too old to go there again. I was planning on having my tubes tied at my c/s, but can't have it done due to having the babies in a Catholic Hospital, so we have decided that once the boys are around 6 months old then DH will be getting the snip.

Our chances of falling pregnant naturally are so minimal - it took us 5 years to get DD - that it probably would never happen, but that 1 in a gazillion chance of it happening is just too scary for us to even consider.

We are in a similar position. Sub fertility. My fertility isn't very good, I only have 1 bad tube (the other is removed) The biggest risk for us is the risk of another ectopic pregnancy. So its condoms whilst we decide for sure. I'm like PZ I don't want the OCP to mess with my already fragile reproductive system. (The pill causes reduced tube movement which increases your risk of ectopic in the event you do get pregnant whilst taking it) Having a 5week old fully BF bub although it would be almost impossible its a risk we can't take just yet.

I have endo and tried for more than three years to fall pg. We where successful on our third Ivf attempt and had our beautiful twins. I laughed at the midwives in the hospital when they asked about contraception! Six months later I fell pg with ds3! What a shock! So after him I had an iud put in. We decided to use our last embryo September last year so I had the iud removed. The transfer was unsuccessful and after a couple of months of unprotected sex I decided to go back on the pill. I was waiting for my period to arrive and decided to use my last hpt just for old times sake. Low and behold BFP! I cried for about twenty minutes and am still wondering how I am going to do it with 4 under 4! Needless to say when the midwives discuss contraception this time I will be taking my options very seriously!!

Oh my goodness zap. You're pg! Wow. Congratulations!
The thought of an IUD scares me (just my own personal thing) and charting sounds WAY to difficult mummasue! So it looks like i'll be giving the mini-pill a try.

Kelly - you aren't old my dear, you're just pg with twins, which must be very exhausting :hug:

After this bub I will be getting a diaphragm fitted. I refuse to go on any hormonal contraceptives ever again, I don't need the extra screwing up of my hormones, and condoms just aren't as fun :D
We definitely want more still, but I don't want do chance an after pregnancy hormonal rebalance pregnancy. I'd like to enjoy this babe for a while. After a year or so I'll probably stop using it and see if a miracle happens, and if not we'll head back for more fert treatment after about 2-3 years depending on BF.

At this stage I imagine that when we are "done" having kids, we'll still only use the diaphragm. Chances are larger than some other methods but I don't think either of us would be the type of people for a surprise pregnancy to be the end of the world. Definitely no tube tying or snips though.

Oh, and why can't you get your tubes tied at the Catholic hospital? I know the Catholic belief around contraception, etc. but it's a hospital for goodness sakes! Surely not all of the staff or patients are Catholic?