I forgot she is only a baby :(

I feel like the worst mother ever. DD1 was only 15months old when DD2 was born and since then I forgot how little she was and treated her like she was older and expected her to behaviour a lot older. It has led to both of us being very frustrated and feeling distant. A few of days ago I read a thing a woman wrote about her sister spending all her time with her baby and being angry at her older child all the time, and pretty much told people to aware of this. Since then with everything I think, what would is do if she was the youngest or she is only a baby. I have been treated her like the baby, how I should have been treating her all along. I feel like is have gotten my daughter back, her behaviour has improved and she is back to being mummys girl and I am just loving her wanting and needing mummy. I feel dreadful thinking about the last 5 months and just want to cry :(.

Nawwwwww xoxoxo Hugs

Aww, hugs hun. You are aware of it now & only you can change how your interact with your DD from now on.

:hug: the important thing is not that you forgot, but that you've now remembered :hug:

i agree with everyone else. at least you saw you were acting differently and changed it. im glad that you have your "mummys angel" back. you definately sound as though you have your children first in your mind.

dd is 2 and 10mnths and since having dd2 3 months ago our relationship has changed in a negative way, shes naughtier, im angrier, i snap at her and she tell me im silly and i need to go away. it makes me sad but it all just happens in the heat of the moment! and i feel so bad after. every morning i say to myself that it will be different and il try harder not to get frustrated with her but i still find it hard. but il keep trying.....

glad you have found a way to re conect with you dd, it is easy to forget that they still need to be mummys little girl too

Don't be so hard on yourself. It's really hard to spread yourself between many people, especially young children. Enjoy this new phase...she loves you just the same as always!

I completely understand where you are coming from! DD1 and DS1 were born 12 months apart and I cringe at the things I expected from her because she was my eldest and I didn't realise how little she really was. In hindsight, and with other babies in my house, I know I expected too much of her and treated her older than she was. When I realised, I felt sad about what I had done also :(

I'm so glad for you though that things are improving with you and your DD1. Kids are very forgiving which is one of the most beautiful things about them. Their ability to love us unconditionally. Enjoy both your babies and don't beat yourself up about it. You are doing a good job. It's not easy juggling kids and making sure everyone is getting what they need (including you).

Huge :hug: coming your way.

Thank you ladies. I am glad I noticed now and I am able to change it. xxoo

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:hug: the important thing is not that you forgot, but that you've now remembered :hug:

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totally agree

I know where you are coming from as my little man is about to turn 3 but at 22 months his sister was born and I do the exact same thing, expect way more than I should and yell at him....I know I shouldn't and wake up everyday swearing things will change but it is such a challenging age that it feels like he is getting worse. It is really making me wonder whether considering baby number3 is a bad idea if I can't provide the right amount of attention to number 1 and then it filters down to our number 2...........;-(

It is so hard, isn't it.

I know I am guilty of this too at times. I try not to expect too much, but sometimes when you are fuggling the other younger children, then eldest is held to a much higher standard. I find myself asking my kids sometimes "how old are you?!?" or "Act your age!" And then realising they are all only very young still! The eldest is only 5yrs old! I do try to be more reasonable and check my expectations of their actions and understandings, but it is a constant struggle when your patience is worn and you are stretched thin between each child's demands.

if you've done this for five months, that is how old your newest bub is, so maybe you've just been in SURVIVAL mode the last five months. It's been a brand new situation for you, being a mummy of THREE children at once, being all things to all three, simulataneously.

i've only had the experience of caring for one child (only had one), but i found it challenging enough, caring for ONE child in the first five months, let alone caring for two toddlers AS WELL.

so cut yourself some slack. you're human and i bet you're doing a fantastic job, caring for THREE children at same time, all with different needs (different developmental stages).

there's only one of you and three of them.

we're all our own worst critic Yowie. Maybe some parents go alot longer than five months, before they realise what you realised.

just keep swimming, just keep swimming.

and don't beat yourself up on this little hiccup, you're doing great Yowie.