[Emergency Caesarian] Serena & Claire's Sudden Arrival 22/08/2011 (Long)
This is the story of how our beautiful twins Serena Brigid and Claire Jolanda came to enter the world quite suddenly on August 22nd, 2011 at 34+6 weeks gestation.
I'd been feeling nauseous and sleepy since the Saturday morning, something that I didn't think I needed to be overly worried about - it just happens sometimes right?
My mother had called a couple of times during the day Sunday, and Chris answered since I was sleeping, and told her I was feeling sick. Later she called back after speaking to her close friend who happens to be a midwife. She told me that Robyn had said that feeling nauseous at this stage could be a bad sign and maybe I should call the hospital just to be sure.
I rarely listen to my mother, but I seem to have a pretty good sense of when she's right, so I had a shower and called the hospital. They asked me to come in just to check me out and make sure there wasn't anything wrong. We got to the hospital around 6pm, and were taken through to a birthing suite for tests.
My feet and hands by this point were certainly bulbous, but had been for weeks - something Dr. Sam had been monitoring. The midwives became immediately concerned about the fluid retention and hooked me up to an ECG before taking my blood pressure.
My blood pressure reading was 160/103. I'd just been see Dr. Sam Friday and there it was a healthy 120/80, just a little bit up from the 110/70 it had been for the previous umpteenth weeks. The midwife couldn't believe her eyes and had four other nurses come in and check the reading, as well as using the automatic machine. All of them got similar results. Straight away they called the on duty obstetrician - Dr. Lucy - who gave the order to admit me, and told us she was on her way in to see us.
Immediately they organised for bloods and took a urine sample, it was all happening so fast! We were expecting to be told to quit our worrying and go home, not for me to be admitted!
My urine tested positive for significant amounts of protein, and by 1030pm was established that I had developed severe pre-eclampsia and it was beginning to effect my kidney and liver function.
Dr. Lucy told me that I should call Chris (who at this point had gone home since he had a 5.40am start) and let him know it was very likely that we would be having the babies tomorrow! I was also now not allowed to eat anything until further notice - this particularly sucked since all I'd had to eat that day was some toast at about midday, and a donut because I was feeling nauseous! She told me that Dr. Sam would be in at about 8am the next morning and to be ready to make a decision.
I was awake all night, partially from the stress and partially because I'd been asleep all day! When Chris called to say he was going to go into work to see what they would say about him leaving to come and help make the biggest decision of our lives so far. I wish I could say I was surprised when he called me at 7am to tell me it was unlikely they would let him leave, but alas, I wasn't. I was just extremely peeved off. Thats when they took my blood pressure again - 165/96! Luckily Chris' work let him go a half hour later, and he was at the hospital in time to be there when I was going to need him most.
Dr. Sam told us straight up that today was the day, our girls were strong and stable enough in utero that they would be fine to come into the world, which was what needed to happen in order to make sure I was kept safe.
Dr. Sam knew how badly I wanted a vaginal delivery, and since the girls had been heads down for the last several weeks, he was willing to let me try if my cervix had at all softened. Alas, it was still hard as a rock. The words hit me like a tonne of bricks and then some. For my safety we could not wait the time an induction would take, they would need to book me in for an emergency c-section.
My everything just went numb and I bawled my eyes out. I was angry, and sad, and terrified all at once. This was the one thing I didn't want, I was so easy going about everything else, so why, why did this have to happen to us? Sam did his best to put my mind at ease and help me understand why it needed to be this way. I could see the pity in his eyes, but at the same time I could tell he knew this was something I could accept and come to terms with. He booked us to go to theatre at 10am to give me some time to process the huge development.
I felt like a complete failure. My girls were fine, this was all happening because of me. My body wasn't good enough to carry them through to the end. My body wasn't good enough to give them the entrance to the world they deserved. I was the one at risk. I was the one who had let them down. Nobody but me. A failure as a woman, and as a mother.
They started to prep me and I went to have a shower. I couldn’t stop crying. Chris was amazing, he listened when I told him how I was feeling, he didn’t tell me I was being stupid or use any negative language. He reassured me that none of this was my fault, nobody knows what causes pre-eclampsia, its like ID twins, it just happens. He reminded me that by making the decision to do this, we were doing the best thing for our girls and our family, and in doing so we were in no way failing, quite the opposite. He washed my back and gave me a massage, all the while telling his blubbering, crazy haired, stretch marked, fat lady how beautiful she was, and how proud of her he was, and how much he loved her. I’d never loved him more than in that very moment. This was what a marriage should be, and it was mine, he was mine. For the first time that day I felt lucky, even if it was just for a second.
They got me into my gown and my bed and it was time. Due to a previous back injury resulting in compressed lumbar discs, the anesthesiologist had warned me that we may have some trouble with getting my spinal block in. Fantastic. I started to cry again. Once again I was a failure. I just wanted to wake up from this nightmare.
I tried to joke my way through my pain but ended up crying all the way to the theatre. The theatre staff could see how upset I was and all made the most amazing effort to ease my worries. When it came time for the spinal though, that took care of that situation! It took 4 attempts to find an area where access to the necessary space was possible. The first attempt was agonizing, she hit a nerve that made me feel like someone had poured acid all over my left leg. I screamed like a little girl! The subsequent attempts were painful, but had nothing on that. Finally we got into a space a bit higher up than the usual, and the comforting numbness started to set in, and I started to feel delirious; did they put shrooms in that spinal or something?! I was practically giddy!
Then it was down to business. Chris came into the theatre, they got me onto the table and cleaned me up. The screen went up and Dr. Catalano set about his work to bring our princesses into the world.
In spite of my giddiness, I was still deeply upset that this was happening. Chris could tell and was comforting me the whole time, reassuring me that we were doing the right thing for our family, and that everything would be okay.
Then we heard her. Our little Serena, our moon princess burst into the world at 11.16am. As soon as I heard that first cry all of my woes melted away. All the bad things I’d been feeling all morning were about as significant as a single grain of sand on a beach. None of it mattered, my first daughter had entered the world and she was alive, and breathing. They cut her cord and bought her over to me. She looked at me with those big blue eyes and smiled, and I kissed her precious little noggin. I’d never seen anything so beautiful, and I made her.
Then came a second cry. Claire bear had arrived. She was alive, and breathing, and relief washed over us both. We had two healthy baby girls. They bought Claire up to me and once again I saw a pair of big blue eyes and a cheeky grin. I kissed her forehead through tears of pure joy. My beautiful girls were finally here.
They took them away to be measured and weighed and have their apgar’s done, and get cleaned up a little all under the watchful eye of Daddy. Dr. Sam popped his head over the screen and congratulated me on our beautiful healthy babies and let me know that they were stitching me up and that the procedure had gone off without a hitch.
Chris came back with a couple of the midwives and our girls and we took our very first family photo with our precious bundles. I couldn’t stop crying I was so happy. It was as if the stress of the morning never happened.
I recovered in the theatre since there was ‘no room at the inn’ in the recovery area. It was nice because it was private and quiet, and I could actually have a chat to the nurses who were cleaning up, and we were all able to ride the high together.
On my way back to my room from the theatre we stopped by the nursery and I got a quick cuddle of my Claire bear - Serena was getting an IV put in so I didn’t get a cuddle of her - then it was time to rest up back in the room, and settle into the feeling of ‘mum.’
Our girls were born at 11.16am and 11.17am respectively. Serena weighed in at a healthy 1930g (4.25lb) and Claire at 2050g (4.51lb), and both had apgar scores of 9 at 1min, and 10 at 5min. They continue to go from strength to strength, and as I write this they are in the special care nursery, but out of the humidicrib and in normal cots. They are feeding through tubes but have both developed a good sucking reflex.
They have big hands with long skinny fingers like Mummy, and quite a lot of thick sandy blonde hair like Daddy. They have Daddy’s ears and nose, and are already very different little girls. Claire is a curious little monkey, and is always taking in her surroundings and letting us know what she thinks - just like her Mummy. She hates it when someone makes her sister upset, or takes her away and is very protective. Serena is laid back and loves to nap, and is more than happy to have individual time away from her sister - just like Daddy.
Our two little princesses are perfect in every way, and while the last 48 hours have been the most epic roller coaster we’ve ever been on, I wouldn’t change it for the world. The staff here at the Mater Mothers in Townsville have been amazing and are so supportive of all of our decisions. They are just as in awe of our strong little girls as we are. Dr. Sam checks on me every morning and always smiles when we give him our updates. It seems wherever our girls are happiness follows and spreads like wildfire.
We thought we knew love before, but it was just the beginning. In fact, I think I might go and bask in it for a while, before I blink and its time to go to kindy.
