Slow let down and baby playing tug-o-war

For weeks (months?) my now 8-month dd has been feeding strangely. She pulls on my nipple really hard, elongating it and sucking hard on the tip (rather than the areola). She pushes her hands against me to really tug hard on my nipple, and I can't get her to come in closer and take more of my areola.

I just realised today (call me incredibly stupid) that my let down is delayed, particularly in my left boob. When I offer her my left boob first she tugs and pulls and gives up. The right boob still takes time, but if we are patient she will get a feed happening.

I only just noticed today that once the milk starts following she stops tugging and latches properly.

After the right boob is drained we can move onto the left boob, because let down is finally stimulated.

I didn't realise what was happening because I don't actually feel letdown happening any more, so I didn't make the association.

Anyway, what should I do? I don't think feeds are very satisfying for her and I'm a bit tired of tug of war.

hand squirt for a bit first?

It doesn't stimulate that deep let down.

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I fear you may have to keep detaching unless she opens wide - but that's a bit of a battle.
Call the ABA and see if they have any better ideas.
Has she had a blocked nose?

It may be a case of just not allowing her to do it, as kmn suggests. Have you called the ABA? They may have some ideas for you
It isn't nice when they do that. Hope you can get her to stop.