GAH she makes me angry!!

Ok - scenario...
I send to daycare all the girls clothes, food, nappies etc including scarf and beanie.
My babysitter (who is causing lots of grief) decided that she was going to allow my youngest to wear one of her daughters old beanies (dora) instead of the ones that i sent. My youngest has subsequently lost this beanie.
I have said i will buy her a new dora beanie (it won't be exactly the same as they no long make that particular one) but a new beanie none the less.
Her response to me was "you have to find that beanie as it's ..... old beanie and they don't make it any more".

Ok so heres my issues and please tell me if i'm wrong.
I sent beanies and clothes etc. If she has chosen to put the dora one on her, risking that it may get lost, how is that my fault???? Then not to mention the response when i told her i would buy a new one.
I'm angry at her because shes blaming me when she could have used the ones i sent and angry at her response to me.

I'd be fuming! Did she lose the beanie in her care or yours? Not that it makes a difference, just curious. I think it's generous of you to offer to replace it!

I agree, she allowed your dd to wear the beanie instead of the one you sent so you shouldn't have to buy her a new one.

Have you sorted out the food issue from the other week? Have you started sending lunch boxes?

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I agree, she allowed your dd to wear the beanie instead of the one you sent so you shouldn't have to buy her a new one.

Have you sorted out the food issue from the other week? Have you started sending lunch boxes?

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i'm looking at a new baby sitter to get out of this whole situation. i'm over being made to feel gulity all the time.

i'd offer to leave the beanie you sent for your DD - i wouldn't even look at getting another Dora beannie

if your DD lost it while in her care, it's basically her saying it - and from the food demands recently, i'd be thinking maybe your DD didn't even wear it - it went missing on her kid and she's now trying to push you further to see what you'll give kwim?

FWIW - i'm glad to see your other thread about looking for another carer - sounds like the time is right.

You are generous offering to replace it! She gave it to your child to wear when you had supplied a beanie for her! Not your fault, if you hadn't supplied one and she had lent to your DD that would be different.

Hope you sort it all out soon as food sounded like a nightmare too.

Did she lose it while the babysitter was looking after her? If so, then tough luck! It isn't like she would replace your DD's beanie if she had lost her own one.

she seems to to think that she sent it home. I always put all her stuff back in the girls bag. I can't say i remember seeing it when they came home. Hence why i was happy to replace it because i don't know if they did bring it home or not and was giving her benefit of the doubt.

I'd be telling her to go jump. You provided a beanie for your daughter, but she chose to let her wear her daughters one instead. So it's her problem it was lost, not yours. You were being quite generous offering to replace it at all. I can't believe she is now demanding that you replace it with that specific design!

Tell her you never saw it, it didn't come home with you. It must still be at her house. Remind her that you sent one for your DD to wear, if she was wearing that it wouldn't be an issue.

I wouldn't be buying her a new one just because she can't find it.

You provided something for your child to wear and she chose to use something else instead - it's also an old item - if it were that precious the the owner then the babysitter should have chosen something else or even just used the one you provided in the first place! Of course you will do the best you can to find it, but you have already made the offer to replace it and if it can't be found then that's unfortunately just something she will have to chalk up to experience.

Argh, I agree find a new babysitter. It all sounds a bit suss. That's 2 weeks in a row now isn't it? First the food drama and now this. I agree with a pp she is trying to see how far she can push her luck.

This lady is an advantage taking mole. I'm glad you're getting rid of her.

You never saw it so I wouldn't replace it, easy. You sent the things your child needed and those things came home. That's all you need to know. It is her own fault she let your DD wear it and put it in the bag (if she really did) so she should have to take responsibility for it.

You offered to replace it, she wants an exact one, you can't buy them anymore so you can't replace it - offer declined in my books. You don't need to replace it at all.

In my humble opinion, if she sent it home with your child and didn't bother to tell you it was in the bag (i.e. "your DD liked my DD's beanie and was wearing it today, so I've let her borrow it overnight"), then how are you supposed to know it was even there? If she packed it up for your child and put it in their bag (and that's a big 'if') then perhaps your DD thought it was a gift.....I mean, why would you send it home overnight anyway? I agree with the others, I think your offer to replace it was extremely generous. I'd make sure she knows you never saw this old beanie so you're offering to replace it out of the kindness of your heart. If she's not happy, then tell her you wont replace it.