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Ok so first I'll start with the logistics
4 year old twins in one room
A 3 and 1 year old in the other
1 PARENT!!
How the hell am I meant to get a bed tr routine happening?? I've being so busy having babies that I haven't established good sleeping habits for my kids and am sick and tired of sharing my bed with three of them!! Please give me any and all bedtime routine especially from parents with three or more kids that do it solo themselves (hubby is working at night)
I lay in bed with DD while her & DS go to sleep. Everyone goes to bed between 7.30 & 8. All lights & TV go off.
Big girls are easier, coz they share a room & put themselves to sleep. DS & DD3 share bunks & the only way DS will sleep in there is if I lay in there til he's asleep. He still ends up in my bed most nights. DD does every night, but I get a few hours to myself.
Maybe work on the younger ones first, then the older ones straight after if you can't get them down at the same time? Just make sure you set a bed time & stick to it.
Story for big kids in one of their rooms. 1 year old (my baby!!!) potters around and looks at their stuff while I read the story. Then the big kids go to their own rooms. I usually leave them with pens and notebooks and they draw until they go to sleep. Then I am free to deal with the baby.
It took a long time to be able to leave DS to go to sleep by himself (4 years). In the end we used old fashioned bribery. DH told him if he went to sleep by himself for three nights he could choose any toy he wanted lol. It worked. He went through patches of protesting but we never gave in and he is great now. DD1 was much younger, we were away for Christmas (so 2y 4m) and was sharing a room with DS. I had to go to the toilet and said I would be back in a couple of minutes but they were chatting away happily so I didn't go back and by the time we got home she was used to going to sleep alone.
For a while there we couldn't see it ever happening, and then it did.
we have 3, 2 in their own rooms and baby with us. I read a story to each in their bed they get a kiss and cuddle and we say our "prayer" for lack of a different word. then take the baby to her cot ( she sleeps side car) and she has her own story, bottle and eventually sleep. sometimes others appear in the bed. as long as they are quiet that's kinda ok (schools started so they are clingy ) and I put them into their bed when they are asleep.
next week we'll start our star charts again. sleep with out fuss, is a star.
it takes time to build the concept and then sticking to your guns but its great to not get kicked too much during the night.
side car cot is great as it gives space but easy access for everybody- we took one side of bars off and put that side next to the bed. you can have 1beside the bed and 1at the end of the bed to start and slowly move the bed away from the end then into another room.
we make it about the kids having their own space. cause they gotta share everything else.
My DH has just started a new job which is afternoon shift, before that he always did the bedtime routine. our twins r only 10.5months so pretty easy as i just have to dress them and put them down. The older 2 I let sit and watch tv while i put the babies down. And then I put the boys to bed. Because I'm by myself to get them to bed at a reasonable hr it has to be pretty production lineish and i do prayers and talking to the boys etc but don't really read them books, i do that during the day though and i sing to the babies and sometimes give them a massage while doing pjs to make it nice. I think when ur dh works nights dont put too much pressure on yourself to do the books and every last thing, its important you get a rest at the end of the day and your kids get to bed at a decent hour, reads books etc during the day and give urself a pass for things at night
I don't have twins but my dh lives away so it's only me 24/7 99% of the time.
I have a fairly rigid routine, but it works for us, and thankfully dd2 slid right on in when she arrived.
I really try hard to get dinner organised in the day time or at least prepared.
5pm baths for DS and dd1. DS plays while I organise dd2.
Dd1 bathes while I feed dd2 and DS dresses/plays/watches tv
Finish getting dinner around 5:30
Dinner eaten by just after 6
Teeth for the older 2 - dd1 helps DS and I finish
6 ish put dd2 down
Sit with DS until he goes to sleep straight after (usually only takes 10 minutes)
6:30 dd1 goes to bed with a book. However, she's a fair bit older than your eldest. She's happy to hang out and do her own thing while I look after the littler ones.
I still have 2 extras in the bed somes nights. Even though I have slept with them all for at least 2 years each, it doesn't't mean I actually enjoy it. It has always been a purely convenience thing for me. Dd2 sleeps in my room anyway, but DS is getting better. Only now at 3.5 is he occasionally happy to be put back to bed when he comes in. Before that all hell would break loose if I tried so I just couldn't be bothered.
Dd1 used to be happy to sleep on a mattress on the floor if she came in in the night. Is that an option?