Cant stop crying :(

I have decided that I need to wean my DD completely, she has been day weaned for a while but I have still been feeding her all night long, I have been saying for the last year that I need to wean so I can fall pregnant again but I just havent been able to do it. Anyway I have decided that I need to wean now, my DD turned 2 4 days ago and im desperate to have another newborn before shes 3!
She hasnt had a feed for 24 hrs now and is doing really well surprisingly, but Im not :( I cant stop crying, I dont think its my hormones going crazy cos I was crying before my body missed a feed just thinking about it! I feel like someone has died!! I am balling my eyes out now :cry: Im so not ready to wean but i really dont think i ever will be. My boobs are absolutely exploding and are really sore and all I want to do is have her feed, the relief wld be amazing! ..but I cant.. I know I really have to do this. I cant really talk to anyone about it in real life cos it sounds so stupid! I wld never have understood how sad it wld be weaning before I breastfed a toddler. I loved it so much.. if I didnt want to fall pregnant so much I wld feed her forever I think.

Has anyone else been like this??! How long does it take to start feeling better?? And do i just let my boobs adjust naturally or is there something I can do to dry my milk up quicker??

TIA xxxxx

Oh Hun. :( plenty of hugs. I haven't been where you are, but I hear your sadness.

Have you thought about weaning a bit more gradually, say over two-three weeks, to make it easier on your body. So cut down the bfs and not have to suffer so much engorgement by doing it all at once?

It's unusual not to be able to conceive just doing night feeds for an over two year old??

Don't think about the fact you have stopped think about how long you fed for and the wonderful job you did.
Her reaction is telling you you made the right choice.

Your body will settle soon but go to your GP or health nurse if it gets too bad.

Good luck

:hug:

Two years is AMAZING. You've done a great job. I can't relate very well.... for obvious reasons so I won't try to offer advice. Just hugs here and an ear to listen if you need it.

I had to stop BF all together with DD2 and DD3 for ttc reasons. Im just one of the people who dont get pregnant whilst BF as much as I wished I was. In the end the desire to get pregnant outweighed the desire to keep BF especially when I had better fertility signs within the fortnight of weaning so I felt like I was doing the right thing in that department.
Its now been 2months since I weaned DD3 and although she doesn't often look for them she still gets comfort in knowing they are there lol. It still makes me sad that she was forced of the boob IYKWIM not in her own time but that feeling definately gets better.
Goodluck with it. DD3 now sleeps all night whilst she didnt when BF so thats a good benefit. Hope you have a BFP really soon.

No advice, just big big hugs x

Hugs Hun,
I have a lump in my chest hearing how you feel because its exactly how I felt when we were ttc number 2 and my DD was only having night feeds. It will get easier. What an amazing job you've done. Lots of cuddles in bed!

I have a 3yo who feeds constantly overnight, and part of me reaaaallly wants a full night's sleep , but when I think about actually weaning & no more bf's, it makes me really sad, so I think it's really normal to be conflicted about it all. But you have a really good reason to wean, and 2 years is just brilliant!

I would be a little careful with the sudden weaning though, you might need to do a little hand expressing to make sure your boobs cope & don't get mastitis. You could talk to an ABA counsellor as well, for some tips on looking after yourself both physically & emotionally.

Good luck with the ttc :)

Oh Rees my heart goes out to you. I've weaned DD off two of her four or so daytime feeds because I want another bub and while in some ways I actually like it (don't have to limit what I wear to something booby friendly) in other ways I feel soooo guilty. Like this afternoon, DD who is cutting her first molars, was overtired, cranky and kept digging around my shirt trying to find a way in and I know it would have soothed her but I stood my ground.

Oh Hun, weaning is such an emotional thing, many mums find it difficult, whatever the reason it is happening... Be kind to yourself. Please also be careful of engorgement which can turn into mastitis very quickly. You might need to hop in the shower and hand express to relieve some of that pressure.

Awwwww huge hugs to you hun. Pre babies, I could never understand people feeding toddlers but now, even though we are still a bit off the girls being toddlers, I can't bear the thought of stopping bf and am in no rush for it to end. You have done awesome and hope that your next little one isn't far off

Thankyou so much for all ur replies! It was a very emotional couple of days for me! But I am feeling better today, my DD has been fantastic with it all, she hasnt shed a single tear wanting it! I just cant believe it! Obviously she was ready and that makes me feel so much better. This is a little girl that slept with us and would not detach from her boobies all night and wld still ask for it all day. She cldnt fall asleep by herself and it was the first thing she looked for when tired or when she was unsure of her surroundings. I absolutely loved being her only form of comfort but it was tiring at times.
Dh has been awesome and has been sleeping with her at night in her brand new big girls room we did up for her birthday but I go in and see her if she wakes up, all she wants then is a cuddle from both of us. She is the sweetest cuddler now too! This morning once DH had gone to work at 630 she put both hands on either side of my face with our noses touching and fell asleep, it was absolute bliss!!!! We slept then til 830! That was one of my biggest fears when weaning.. no sleep ins anymore... but it doesnt look like that will be the case thank goodness! I never got proper snuggles at night because all she wld want is boobie... So im so happy a few little pro's are popping up now, weaning isnt SO bad afterall... I still wld have preferred not to do it though!
I am seeing my little girl in a different light now too, its like she has grown up so much just in the last week, she is just so precious.

My bbs are still so sore, they are very very tender and each time i bump them my eyes water.. I have tried expressing in the shower but it doesnt make them feel much better! They just feel bruised all over... i might give some cabbage leaves a go tonight... hopefully they start going down soon!

I like replying to each person that comments on my posts.. so here we go! :)

Jennifer- thankyou so much. The gradual weaning just wldnt work here though since the only times she was feeding was from 8pm til 8am in bed. It wld have been near imposssible to cut out some feeds but not the others because i pretty much slept thru everything! And i think it wld have confused her more then anything. I am temped to go and grab a newborn and feed it though to relieve some pain!!!

Duchess- Thankyou :) Any normal person wld probably have regular afs by now too but not me! :( Ive only had 3 afs in the last 2 years, first one being in Nov '12 and according to blood tests i got weekly thru my gyno over the last month Im not ovulating. He said that theres just some women that have to wean in order to fall pregnant.. especially when i was still feeding her 10+ times throughout the night. It might also have to do with the fact my body has never been regular, I had to use Clomid to conceive DD because after 10 years on the pill and skipping af every month it had no idea what it was doing! I go for my next gyno appointment on wed and fingers crossed he gives me the presciption for clomid to help get things on track... he better since I have weaned DD mainly for that reason!

Forshelby- Thankyou! and thanks for always being there in times like this, i know I can always rely on u to be a great long distance understanding friend xx

Mildez- DD is already sleeping better too!!!! Its wonderful!!! I definitely dont regret waking hrly to feed for the last 2 years though, im so glad i cld give her that, I am definitely enjoying the extra sleep now though :) i hope u get ur bfp soon too!! xx

Sahbear- Thankyou! ur hugs are very much appreciated!! xx

Babyluv- :( its so hard isnt it! why oh why cldnt we be the lucky ones that fell pregnant whilst bfing?! did u end up weaning cold turkey or just reducing the feeds? How long was it until u got ur bfp??

Bhoysgirl- No dont ever wean ur DS if u dont have too!!!!! ;) 3 is amazing, well done!! Hopefully i can let my last baby self wean, then falling pregnant wont matter!

Ladylove- Its so hard isnt it! :( Last night my Dad took DD out for dinner, he was going to take her for a walk in the city afterwards but she cracked it and wanted to come home to mummy straight after dinner, by the time he got her to me she was sobbing, all I wanted to do was sit down and feed her and take away all her tears. She was fine as soon as I cuddled her but I wasnt! We only have 2 yr old molars to go now, she has been great with all her other teeth because Ive always just bf for comfort so Im dreading these ones that have still got to come!

Oceanprincess- thankyou so much. I never ever thought it wld be so hard emotionally! I thought all women got to the stage where they wanted their body back and found it easy to wean, but nope not here, and obviously its not like that for many women! Thanks for shower tip, it helps but not enough! Hopefully things settle down soon for my poor bbs!

Melissa- I cld never understand bfing a toddler either before DD, im really embarrassed to say that to me it was a bit weird and creepy. Well havent my views changed.. for the better! After 1 you dont need to stress so much about their intake or ur supply or what you eat so much... and all the other things that u worry about when breastfeeding... I wld recommend for everyone to bf past one just because its so enjoyable!!! Our bfing relationship just kept getting better and better :) All the best with your girls!!



Thanks again ladies... hopefully all the hormonal stuff from weaning doesnt start kicking in soon and makes me feel like crap again! xxx

Thinking of you. I am starting to wean my 2yr old because of ttc. I managed to fall pg with him while feeding dd until 2.5 but no go this time (no periods now for five years). It's such a tough decision but one that is right for our family.

Good luck.

Double, double,
double trouble...

So many double posts lately??

I wonder if there's scope for a thread dedicated to TCC while breastfeeding? Seems a few of us are in the same boat.

Ahh I'm so glad to read your update. You sound like you're feeling a lot better. I can't imagine it being an easy transition at all. :hug: Awesome that you still get sleep ins though.... do you think you could get my DS to stay in bed after 4.30am sometimes? LOL