Duplo or Lego for 3 yo?

I have 3 kids (6, almost 3 & just 1yr) and have so far managed not to purchase any Duplo. Instead my eldest has accumulated Lego.

My DD (about to turn 3) has become quite captivated with her brother's Lego. She builds basic structures, but does struggle a bit to connect the pieces strongly and so can have some sad moments when her creations crumble if bumped etc as they're not pressed together firmly.

With her 3rd birthday (and Christmas) coming up very shortly, I was contemplating getting her some of her own construction - but I'm in two minds about whether I should buy Duplo or just get her a bit of pink Lego. I know that Lego is aimed at 4yrs+ and I can understand why in the sense that DD at 3 is not at the stage of following pictoral instructions &, as I've mentioned, is lacking the manual strength, though can still use it.

Considering I have another daughter waiting in the ranks, perhaps some Duplo would be good for the girls to enjoy while their brother is constructing with Lego - but I had someone recently suggest that I just give Duplo a miss, considering I've got this far without it.

Any thoughts or experience on this?

Our DD1 recently turned 4 and we got her a huge set of Duplo and she's getting more for Christmas to share with DD2 (who will be 2 a week before Xmas).

I love Lego and although both our daughters are amazing builders (especially DD1, she's unbelievable!), Lego just seems to old for DD1 yet. I'm stoked with Duplo, the range is really fun and interesting and it has great resale.

My boys have duplo and has had many sets for a few years now. They love it and lots of different sets. They do have some Lego but actually unopened!!

DS1 is 5 and DS2 is nearly 4

It's personal choice really, DD1 (just 5) an build lego from an instruction booklet & also make her own free form things.

DD2 (nearly 4) can build towers, pass me the shapes in the books but not quite get placement.
She loves the smaller lego & we've gotten rid of the duplo sized blocks now.

Both the girls are quite obsessed with lego at the moment.

If she is already playing with Lego, duplo might be a step backwards. We didn't start accumulating any Lego until dd had just turned 4. At almost 4.5 she can now make some of the trucks in the city range almost by herself (she needs guidance, and like you mentioned, some things don't entirely click together for her).
Maybe get the duplo between your dd and her sister if you are concerned and hold off on Lego a little while. There is a new/dedicated range of Lego for young builders due to hit Australia in January. Looks to be some interesting sets! There is also disney princess stuff coming out in Lego rather than just duplo.

There is a Lego/mega bloks thread on here that has a lot of discussion about sets for kids at different ages. Mostly seems to be aimed at the 4-5 year olds given those of is crazy enough to be as in to Lego as our kids seen to have kids that age! Can't post a link though cos I'm on my phone

I didn't have any duplo with my first either and their ages are similar.
I got the pink set for DD1 just before she turned 4, and for exactly the reasons you stated it got put away.
Duplo is a great way to get them into following the more simple instructions, the pieces are easier to manage and snap together. Me, I'm all for independence. I have a 1yo too and the duplo is great for her even though she's had access to proper lego her whole moving life. The bigger kids have moved on a bit, but everytime their mates come over you can bet what gets pulled out, and DD1 is totally cool with helping the little ones build stuff.
Lego now also have a range that is aimed to the 3-5s....called.....nah can't remember but it's a new range and they do have some princess stuff in there.

We have both duplo and Lego. DD1 is 4. She hasn't touched the Duplo for a good two years, just not interested. But she plays with her Lego daily. She's not great at building things - she can do it, follow the instructions etc, but she just doesn't care. We build her things and then she plays with it for hours each day.

I went straight to Lego for DS1 when he was almost five and he was instantly addicted! No fancy sets, just lots of blocks and wheels and imagination.

DS2 is nearly 4 now. He still struggles with Lego. Duplo would be better for him, I'm sure. But I think it's such a short phase that it would be a waste for me. Unless some gave secondhand to me or I had someone to pass it on to. I agree with the 'give it a miss' suggestion from your friend.

Why does she need pink Lego? Regular Lego is not gender specific. There are great intro sets that build little house facades and have shop fronts and appeal to everyone.

My DD will be getting both for xmas & her 3rd birthday. She has some duplo already that was DS's and she loves it. I wouldn't get too much though as it is only a short time that they play with it for. DS is almost 5 and struggles with some of the pieces clicking together and getting the pieces in the right spot as per the instructions. But in the short time he has been playing with Lego, he has improved really quickly. He still plays with the duplo as well sometimes.

Ds has both he loves Lego but can get frustrated taking it apart to make new creations so the duplo is good for his little hands. He is getting a new duplo set for Christmas.

DS has both. Now he's a Lego fanatic the Duplo is rarely used, but he'll occasionally get it out for a bit. He can follow most Lego instructions totally by himself now (likes to have us there the first time, and he always recognises when he's stuck so can ask a specific question about what he needs help with) and loves that they're more complex than Duplo. Separating the pieces can be tricky, but a separator helps. But, he's got 'that' kind of brain...iykwim.

If you're after something independent, then Duplo would be good (and you don't have to worry so much about keeping it away from the 1yo). As BG said, you could also try the Young Builders Lego as it doesn't have the small fiddly bits.

We are big duplo fans in this house so I would say run with the duplo. It allows them to do a little bit of building but has more pieces that they can just play with without having to do too much first. My DD is 6 and has some awesome lego which she loves, but she will still get the duplo out & play with it. Big kids love it & play with it if its there too. It's so chunky & satisfying in a tactile way that little lego isn't. They've got some lovely princess & castle stuff available now which adds another dimension for imaginary play.

We have both in our house (DD is almost 5, DS1 is 3.5 and DS2 is 1) and the duplo is wonderful for my DSs to play with together. DS2 loves the noise it makes and is constantly tipping it all out and then DS1 will build something with it all. DS1 isn't quite up to Lego yet. He will sit with Daddy or me and help us with his Lego but he's not quite there.the duplo is different. I'm really glad we've got it. Even DD comes over and builds things with them when the boys start playing with it.

Personally I think Duplo being for little kids is an adult concept and I try to steer clear of thinking and encouraging any thinking in my two that Duplo is only for little ones. We have heaps of Duplo from when I was little and also acquired second hand (trainset, boat, lots of vehicles). I still love to play and build with it - I have stuck stickers on it to make puzzles, made it into Christmas decorations, built staircases for the dolls houses etc etc - I don't think any Duplo purchase is ever wasted. DD might get some Lego for Christmas I can't decide, the biggest factor for me is that we have DS, if she was the youngest or an only child, maybe would plough into Lego more, but for DS Lego would be no good - and more often than not they play together or in the same space so Duplo is better.

Some excellent points & thoughts - thank you!

I'm thinking that I may get a small amount of Duplo for the girls to play with - thinking about 2nd hand to reduce the cost. It might help resolve a few disputes too when DS is building with Lego & DD gets in and takes pieces he wants. If she has her own construction medium, then they may play alongside one another more happily :-)

I think duplo is pretty good! Especially if you have another young one that could use it. Gumtree has lots of good deals second hand.