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How old did u start notice ur kids feeling embarrassed naked?
I ask this because these last couple of weeks DD 2yrs3months has started resistinh getting undressed, mostly in front of her dad or ppl she doesn't know. I would have thought she was too young young to have that level of awareness of self consciousness? She often sees DP and me naked while showering/dressing, so i would assume it should seem natural to her? Or would this be more like just another 2yr old tantrum/meltdown situation?
My dd became more self aware at 4. She is fine being nude in front of family but no male family except her dad now at 5.
I would think resistance to undressing is just a field if 2 year old battles. I haven't seen the actual behaviour though. Is she looking at others when you try and undress her?
Mine all started wanting to close the door to the toilet & hiding to get undressed between 2 & 3. DD3 is 3y 3m & will play on the beach naked still, but won't get changed in front of people. :dunno:
My almost 11 year old would run around nude if I didn't remind her not to! Well... probably not in front of her school mates. No issues with nudity in our house, but I do teach the kids that its not always appropriate. If we don't have guests, none of the kids close the loo door (10, 8 and 3) and I often find them having a chat while they poo!
My youngest is just four. He has started to not want to get dressed in front of friends and swimming. Strangers is ok though. However my 5.5 yo still doesn't care.
I think it depends in the child. There is no perfect age. Just don't mock them for their embarrassment, or let anyone else (grandparents and the older generation can be the worst) and allow them to have their privacy.
Dd1 is 6.5 and doesn't like us to see her, dd2 doesn't care at almost 5 she will run around with nothing on all day. Ds is 3.5 and won't let you see you him get dressed but will run about Witt nothing either. We just follow their lead it's no big deal.
Interesting perspectives here. DD1 is nearly 8 and so far doesn't seem to care about any of us seeing her naked (or seeing us naked). She still baths with her sister sometimes (or has a shower while DD2 is in the bath). If she has friends around for a swim they all happily still pile into the shower afterwards together (and no difference boys or girls yet, although one of her little friends that's a boy has started preferring to leave the girls and get dressed/showered by himself).
I guess the advice to follow their lead is a good one. I prefer not to come into conflict over little things and this would fall into that category.
Thanks for all your replies ladies. I guess I have just found it a little odd to have a self awareness at her age... I have very much made nakedness a non issue in our household. She follows me into the toilet and I explain what mummys doing when she asks, shes with me in the bathroom during a shower and I even have the occasional bath with her sometimes. Same with DP. This is gonna sound really really stupid but ive always had a thing with sexual molestation. And there is this tiny tiny seed that says to me what if its that? The fact that its an all of a sudden thing, and that she protests so strongly has made me think..... I think im just paranoid maybe.....
At her age they like to start to take control, do things for themselves and clothes are often the first, it's most likely just part of that.
Changes in behaviour can indicate "interference", but from what you gave written it just sounds like a normal little girl starting to realise that boys and girls are different. There would be other behaviour changes as well if there was something more to worry about. Maybe this link will help reassure you....
Family Planning Queensland :: Traffic Lights guide to sexual behaviours in children and young people: identify, understand and respond
Kid's will be all different ages and sometimes they learn from things we were not expecting, so maybe she's seen someone react in a particular way on TV or other family or friends. It seems more likely that she has learned its a way of controlling things as she gets 1:1 attention if she is taken into another room, so maybe it's just that. Just monitor and keep reinforcing that nudity isn't a big deal. :hug:
It's really important to keep being relaxed yourself with your own nudity. Research shows ( I read it recently in an article but can't find it at the mo) that girls delay starting sexual activity when there families are comfortable with nudity.
It's also vital to use correct terminology with children. Yes boys/ men have testicles, scrotums and a penis and girls/ women have a vulva and vagina. So many people call the female genitals a vagina but its more accurate for a child to use the word vulva. Using correct terminology helps to reduce or eliminate any shame with our private parts. It's also is a clear indicator if( and I pray this never happens) your child has been interfered with. A person with bad intentions is more likely to use 'pet' names for body parts so If a child starts saying their 'hoohoo' is itchy, you have a clue that something might be up.