wonder weeks.. leap 4.. gaahhh

leap 4.. tell me theres an end.. that there actually is alight at the end of this very long and painful tunnel..

im not actually sure how much longer i can dealwith this clingy crying sooking teething bundle of.. joy? seriously i am doing my head in.. throw a very bored and slightly put out 4 year old and my days are just a pile of tears and tantrums.. from everyone (myself included) i thought he was very near the end and the last few days have just been amped up a notch or 2 (hes 24.5 weeks.. its supposed to be over, isnt it?)
and i havent even started on the sleep regression.. i just. i cant. ive been back at work sincehe was 4 months(which actually has been pretty ok, everyone is transitioning nicely, i thought) maybe this is the reason for everything? he wont sleep for any more than 30mins at a time during the day.. and im lucky if he goes down twice.. takes me at least an hour of a night to get him to sleep (he used to go to sleep on the boob. not anymore) and then hes awake within a few hours if not less, which is when i switch beds and lay down and feed him to sleep.. throughout the night we cosleep and he just feeds when he wants it.. i dont know how much longer i can do this..

then theres that.. i have given serious consideration to weaning.. but there is so much pressure to breastfeed.. to continue breastfeeding until well.. when? hes 1? or 2? or starting school?.. im sorry i knowi sound bitter.. theres my own insdie voice peer pressure.. i spent so long beatig myself up because i couldnt/didnt bf my dauhter past 4 months (only ebf her for 2) and now im considering weaning because.. well a couple of things.. work (which is a cop out i guess, becuase its really not that hard, just slightly time consuming) but its mainly the clingyness.. and is he hungry? is that the problem?
i am so scared he is going to stay like this.. i cant put him down for even a minute without him cryng.. nothing is being done.. im becomig this grouchy mumma that everyone is avoiding (husband included) becuase everything is getting ontop of me.. i cant have a sooky baby, DD was never like this (i dont rememeber her being like this anyway..) i dont know how much longer i can do it..

That's very difficult. :hug: It sounds like you've got lots of things going on at the same time and that naturally makes it all harder.

One thought re weaning: do you believe you'll get more sleep that way? It sounds like the lying down and feeding at night makes things easier. What will you do if you don't use the breast? You don't have to breastfeed if you don't want to :) Mother are often warned that their babies will wake because they're breastfed, but I think the truth more often is that they are awake, so they breastfeed to go back to sleep.

Do you have a sling or carrier to use during the day?

Is there anything in your life you can let go of, or give to someone else to do so you can have one less thing on your plate?

Hang in there. Hang in there. Babies do this, but it will get better.

if i were to wean him he would go onto formula, because if i was going to go to the trouble of expressing i would just bf..
i do have a carrier, but i have a compression fracture in my lower back and i just cant (as well as i shouldnt) carry him around.. plus hes a boof head and is too heavy lol.. though am constantly carrying him around as it is..
i think in re to gettig more sleep if i wean, i might just be trying to convince myself that that is the answer to more sleep.. i havet actally tried feeding him and putting him back to sleep.. because from about 10 weeks he would sleep from about
6 to about anywhere from 2-4am.. so this hourly wake ups have thrown me and i am just knackered.. throw in starting work.. and teething.. gahh..
i sound ike a big fat whinger.. just struggling atm.. and not seeing an end anywhere in sight is very overwehlming..

You aren't a whinger xxx you are a tired, frustrated mumma and that's ok. We have ALL been there!

Firstly, it gets better. I promise it gets better. I can't tell you when, but I can tell you that it gets better.

It sounds as though your bubba is going through a few things at once. The wonder week being a big one, coupled with the transition of you being at work as well as some overtiredness during the day (30 min naps are the big clue here)

What signs does your little one give you when he is getting tired? Mine used the ALWAYS do an eye rub and then it progressed from there. Is there an average time he can cope with before needing a nap?

If he has "tells", my advice would be to try to get him into bed at the first sign. It could be with feeding (if you like) or begin a routine that is easy to stick to and predictable (sitting in a chair with quiet music until the heavy eyes started was a winner here with my kiddos).

If he doesn't have a tell as such but can last say 2 hours before desperately needing a nap, could you perhaps try to beat him to it by 10 minutes and try putting him down at 1 hr 50?

With the night time wakings, what do you do when he wakes? How do you try to get him back to sleep? Is it consistent?

I know it might sound as though I am trying to suggest a forced routine - I'm actually not :) what I found worked with mine far more than any routine I tried was consistency. If I took the same steps each day for day sleep, naps and night wakings, it soon became a predictable cue for bubs to know it was time for sleep.

I know it might not seem like it, but trust me, there is an end in sight xxx in the meantime, let's see what we can work out xx

Looking closer at your thread, 30 min naps and hourly night wakings actually sounds like an overtired bubba.

What time does he wake, nap and go down for bedtime?

With a developmental leap, tiredness always happens afterwards. It's kinda like their little body is spent from the leap.

You're not a whinger, that's a really hard gig. I've done it with both of mine, as have lots of other mummas.

You have choices. You could try some different options and see if anything helps, or you could just work around it and get what rest you can.

I struggled with my first, but by my second realised that nothing really helped with they were like this - they do just grow out of it when they're ready - and struggling and trying to fix things tended to just make me tireder without actually achieving anything.

Your back sounds bad! Have you asked around to see if there might be a carrier option suitable for you? I'm no expert, but i do know of people with bad backs finding things that can work for them. What about other people wearing your baby during the day? If you're having to carry him anyway, a good, ergonomic carrier that distributes the weight better would be a better option, I guess? What have you been using? Good carriers are good to 20+kg

As for magic solutions, sorry, I have none. :hug: They have periods of separation anxiety - and this might be exacerbated by your return to work - and they often get this way when they're teething and, quite frankly, any time when the stars and planets are not in some precise alignment.