My relationship is over

I don't really want to post a lot of details here but my DH ( we aren't actually married) and I are separating and he is going to China to work for a 3 year contract.

This is obviously not my choice as we have a 2year old daughter, but apparently he has been unhappy in our relationship for years- he has never once told me this or attempted to change anything- and when everything came to a head he agreed to try and make it work for our DD but he made no effort and it has all fallen over now, 3weeks later.

I am so, so angry he has done this to our daughter. And the thought of being a single mum, struggling to pay the mortgage etc makes me so scared. At this stage he will be earning a lot of money in China so says he will send a large amount home every week so we can pay a chunk out of the mortgage, but I will obviously be talking to a lawyer as well.

I know I can cope with DD by myself as he basically hasn't been here for the last 6months very much, but I am just shattered for her sake.........

Oh Saffy my lovely lady I am so sorry to read this. I don't have anything useful to say other than you are amazing and more than enough for DD. I am here if you need an ear anytime to listen xx

I'm so sorry, Saffy. : (
I know you can cope too, but it's not the same as what I can imagine you might have wanted for you & your daughters future. It all sounds a bit unfair & sudden. A lawyer is a good idea (as much as it probably pains you to do). Thinking of you. Xx

Thanks beautiful ladies, feeling very sad tonight having DDs 2nd birthday party today and having to put on a happy face, no one knows except a couple of family members so far.

Cripes. I don't know how you managed that. How upsetting. : (

Happy birthday to your dd, I'm sure you made it a great 2nd birthday party. Xx

Well done on the happy face when you probably wanted to kick him in the goolies.

Wtf?!?!
Oh Hun =**( I'm so sorry, massive hugs!
Please if there is anything I can do please let me know.

What an arsewipe....

Oh hun, I'm so very sorry for you!

I am really sorry to hear Saffy :comfort:

So sorry Saffy :( how devastating.

Lots of hugs your way..

I'm really sorry to hear that :(

Definitely get straight onto a lawyer - the sooner that things are formalised, the better.

Big hugs :grouphug:

Oh saffy so sorry to hear this, sending big hugs to you, what a shock for you and not how you wanted things for DD :(

Oh saffy :(

I'm so so sorry lovely lady. I'm devastated for you. What a shock. You and little miss will be fine. But that doesn't mean it won't hurt for a long time.

I'm so sorry to hear this! What a shock for you.

It will be hard but you can do this. As others said, get a lawyer and formalise everything. And don't forget to look after yourself as your energy can be focused on your DD at this time and sometimes your own needs get pushed to the side.

I'm really sorry. Get yourself a good lawyer xoxox

So sorry to read this saffy :( Sadly this is becoming the norm these days (well at least with everyone I know) Nobody can be bothered to try anymore. Big :hug:

I totally agree Tasha.

The irony is, DHs mother left when he was 18months old and he has never seen her since. You would think that this would mean you would do anything to prevent this happening to your child but obviously not. His issues are way too major for me to deal with, and he refuses to acknowledge them or get any help.

Big hugs Saffy, what a shock for you. I hope you found a little joy in celebrating your dds birthday.