LTTTC and age gaps

We started ttc in August 2013 and DS was born just last month. I feel so blessed as I know other couples who have had to try for much longer to meet their little one/s and I was lucky to fall pregnant naturally just before starting a clomid cycle.

I want DS to have a buddy. I have two younger sisters and we had a blast growing up and are so close now as adults.

I want to enjoy DS for at least a year before we start trying for another I just worry that I will
A) fall straight away and have two under two which I'm not sure how I'd cope as I've been hit pretty hard with pnd.
B) take ages to conceive and be too old. I've just turned 32 so I'm not *that* old but it does play on my mind.

How did you decide?

After having trouble conceiving no3 I didn't bother going on contraception and we hoped to conceive again. Their is 3yrs9months between 3&4.
My SIL took almost 8yrs to conceive her 1st. She had terrible PND so waited until her DD was 1yr old and started trying again. She fell in her 1st cycle completed unexpectedly.

It took 6 years for ds1 to come along, an ivf baby. I didn't want to wait very long in between babies either bc I didn't know how long #2 would take (unexplained infertility). We were due to have another ivf transfer in January but fell naturally in November after 2 months of trying. We have a 2 year gap and it's hard work, especially those first 3 months with a newborn and a toddler. I think I would've waited a bit longer had I known it would only take 2 months. I was already 36 though so I was thinking that if it took a few years for #2, that would make me close to 40 so I was kind of in a hurry.
A year is a long time, see how you go. Your feelings about it will change monthly anyway! [emoji6]

DD took a long time to arrive and I wasn't sure my head or heart could cope with potentially going back into TTC mode if it was going to be hard work again.
When DD was a year old I went back to work then after a few months I thought maybe I could try again!
I really was loving being a mum and juggling work! Then we decided to just see what happens and like Andie were blessed quickly with another pregnancy. DS is 2.5 years younger than DD and I think it's a nice gap. It is hard work at the beginning but I think adjusting at any age gap would be.
It's hard to plan it when you aren't sure how long it might take you to conceive this time.
Good luck with whatever you decide and enjoy your little one now xx

We waited 5 years for DD (a LOT of assisted conception and all failed) and then endured a pregnancy with life threatening HG so it was a massive decision whether to go through all the heartache again. It also played on my mind that I would miss out on so much of DD's life during my pregnancy.....but on the flip side I desperately wanted her to have sibling/s. We waited until she was 3 to TTC again. I got a BFP first cycle. By 3 she was a little more independent than a little tiny tot ad had a bit more understanding. Looking now, I wish I had been able to have my babes closer. For us it was a 'good' gap with an almost 4 year old and a newborn. TTC again, I feel like (for us) a minimum 7 year gap and counting, between 1 & 3 might be too big. I'm the same age as you and tbh it plays on my mind too.

FWIW I think second time around is somewhat easier with the newborn, sleep deprivation, struggling etc. You know what to expect from yourself and need to fore think and put those coping strategies and support networks in place so you aren't thrown in to turmoil :hug: