Routines that work with two

Alrighty I would love as much input as possible about different routines that worked with two children DS is 4 and bubba #2 is due in 8 wks. DS will be at kindy 2-3 days a week and still appreciates a daytime sleep around 1pm (currently working on a routine for quiet time when he doesn't want to slep), hubby works strnage hours (police officer) so although he will help out when home I need to be able to do it all myself.

Mostly I would like to hear how you handle bedtime. At the moment we read 2-3 books to DS and then sit with him while he falls asleep. He sometimes offers to go to bed by himself but I'm expeting that will change when bubba arrives and don't want him to think we don't have time for him because of #2. Ideally I would love the two of them to go down together - any ideas?

I know bubba will set her own routine bt just looking for ideas at the moment. Thanks

Wow! So with you on this topic!
DD#1 is 4.5 and my new DD#2 is 6 months so similar ages to you! My DH rarely gets home before 8 when it's all finished and over anyway, so the hardest part I have found is adjusting to dividing attention between the two whereas I have been used to focussing on only one baby/child. And waiting for them both to go to bed to get other things like cleaning kitchen etc. done!!

For nightime routine ->
Get dinner ready first before the crazy time begins (seriously!).

I try to have dinner ready to reheat before 5pm, when we begin our nightime routine which is mostly unchanged for #1. It goes bath/shower, pjs on, dinner, fun n games (ie. TV, computer, jigsaws etc) then reading books and bed. I just feed/attend to #2 in amongst all this.
If possible, I bath them together oldest child in bath first, and out last. #2 is fed either during #1's bath, or during #1's dinner, or #1's story time or after #1's in bed depending on her need/when she's crying.

We don't work to a timetable, so much as a routine/order of activities, so I can be flexible around new baby. Ie. start finish routines/activities as suits me in order to attend to #2.

It's really difficult at first, but it gets easier. Keep the hours of 5pm to 7.30ish free and at home as it can be a bit crazy.

Thanks, those are some grat ideas, I'm hoping this baby is fairly easy going and slides into our existing routine :crossfingers:

I love the idea of having dinner ready early, I remember doing that when ds was little. Thanks for that tip

I love your age gap. I am finding the 2.5 yr gap really horrible.

I find that I get really stressed if we have to go anywhere. I don't have to carry prams or anything, we just carry one back pack and a sling, but it still takes me what seems like hours to get out. I used to hear people say this and think they were crazy, but really this gets me down and that is when I start getting really antsy. So, my best tip has been to pack my bag ready to go out. That way if we have to go somewhere there is less stress and everybody is more relaxed.

I know that sounds so simple, but it really didn't occur to me to do until somebody said last week.

Also I saw something, can't remember what it was called, but it was a knife that toddlers can use to cut food but it doesn't cut their fingers. Getting your 4yo to help cut up dinner would be a thrill I am sure.

Linda.

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try and keep #1 to his routine and you will find that #2 will slowly start to fit into the same routine. .

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This is what we found too.
My oldest is younger than yours - only just turned two - but she's always had a clear bedtime routine and strict bed time so we stuck to that and we have found that DS has just fallen into it. He has his last feed at 6.30pm and they both go off to bed at 7pm which is what DD has always done. Definitely get dinner out of the way early so you can get them both down at a reasonable time.

My two daughters are 29 months apart. So DD#1 was 2 years and 5 months when DD#2 was born (perfect age gap in my opinion).
My DH is a firefighter, therefore works shift work - away all night for 2 nights a week, which means i have to put two littlies to bed on my own.
Didnt even think of a routine when DD#2 was first born, and knew it was silly to introduce one so early. So first 3 mths DD#1 stuck to her routine - in bed, book and teeth by 7pm. I then dealt with DD#2. After 3 mths DD#2 gradually was getting into a sleeping routine. So now i:

BATH - 5pm
DINNER - 530PM
PLAY - 6PM
TEETH/BOOK/PACKUP - 630PM
SLEEP - 7PM

I read DD#1 a book lying on her bed, with DD#2 inbetween us. DD#1 happily says goodnight, i shut her door, then breastfeed DD#2 to sleep in her room.

THis works for me, may not for you. Only thing that worked for me that i thought was good advice, dont expect a routine in first 12 weeks of your newborn....just stick to your routine you originally had with the older child.....your second child will gradually fit in....

Thanks for all this wonderful advice, it's exactly what I hoped to do - I just hope it works :-)

You will have the exact same gap as I have with Paris & Seth. And I have to say it worked fine!

I would get up (often at about 8 LOL) and get paris breakfast, feed Seth, Paris would dress herself and then I'd dress myself and seth (I'd shower the night before). Then I'd do Kinder drop off. Sleeptime well Seth just had to work around Paris... some days it would be hard because he would have to be woken up... but he would just have a bigger nap later. Now he has a nap at 11 am till about 1 pm then another for about an hour at 4. And then they are both in bed by 8. We have dinner around 6-6:30 then bath, feed for seth, story time and bed...

I LOVE this gap :) For me its been a very very easy transition! She is like a little mummy and his best friend all in one!

*hugs*
Cailin

Thanks DH and I always planned this age gap (although I did feel a littel guilty when you see other closer age gap kids playing together) and I am really happy with it as DS is really involved and enjoying the pregnancy. he is very excited about getting a little sister and even picked an outfit for her today (which I just had to buy so he can say it's from him :-)

I like the age gap too! Especially when #1 can dress, feed, toilet herself!
BTW Saram, my #1 just asked re. your ticker, and thought your "baby" looked very beautiful.

Sliding #2 into #1's routine is definitely the way to go.
Ruby #2 just gets woken up all the time as she is in/out of car etc. But she has learnt v.v. quickly to powernap wherever, whenever!!

OOo I'm very interested in this topic too! Tho there'll only be a 2 year 4 month age gap for me.... still, Gab will hopefully be old enough for verbal communication so we'll be right :)

Saram - if you don't have one already, I reckon a Slow Cooker would be a great device to help in the early days when things are a bit haywire. I reckon getting dinner ready in the morning and letting it cook all day would be heaps easier than trying to do it all at jungle hour! I reckon my slow cookers are gonna get a workout!