Double time-help and advice needed

DH and i have been talking about TTC #2 soon.....veey soon in fact.:biggrin:

If all plans worked then by the time #2 was born Chelsea would be 11-14 months old. We never did want a big age gap between her and the next bub.

What we would like to know though is at that stage where would Chelsea be up to with:

1. Pram-would be need a double pram?

2. Cot-would we need another or would DD be old enough to go into a single bed with safety rails?

3. Car seat-I assume we would need another convertable seat??

Also for those who have small age gaps.....how did you cope being PG with a young child...and then afterwards when it was born?

Can you aso tell me the age gap you have....?

Kim, there is 25 months difference between Jacob and Ruby, so a bit more than you are planning to have.

To answer your questions specifically:

1. We still need a stroller. We have a Phil & Ted's e3 which accommodates a toddler and newborn and then two toddlers - it's a great stroller. Some people may already have a stroller that you can buy a toddler seat for, or get a skateboard that you attach to the back of the stroller where you toddler can stand. I prefer to know that Jacob is strapped in safe and sound. He is 2.5 next month and enjoys walks in the stroller. So yes, you would most likely need something. For a while you may get away with just carrying your newborn in a baby bjorn or hug-a-bub if you prefer whilst Chelsea is in the stroller.

2. Cots/Beds: We tried Jacob in a toddler bed which the recommended age for was 15 months (this was clearly labelled on the box). He roamed his cot a log during his sleep and ended up on the floor in the middle of the night, so we put him into a single bed with a bed rail and that was much better for him (he still throws himself about a lot in his sleep). So Chelsea may still be a little bit small for a toddler bed or big bed, I'm not sure. I guess it's a personal decision that you'd need to make after working out how well Chelsea sleeps in her cot and if you think she would be safe elsewhere. There have been some threads on making the transition from cot to toddler bed or big bed recently.

3. Car seats - what we did was change Jacob's carseat back to the newborn position, and got a Safe 'n' Sound Maxi Rider for Jacob, which will suit him until he can sit in the seat all by himself, i.e. he will never need any other kind of booster seat. It is a great seat and we feel it's safer than a normal booster seat. It is hooked in with an anchor point like other car seats (but unlike booster seats) and has a harness. When your child is a bit older and can use a seat belt, you can remove the harness and use the seat belt with it! So it 'grows' as your child does.

As for coping with a little one whilst PG - it was hard. Jacob is a very active little boy and so it was difficult, but I got there! I haven't had the easiest time post-birth with some physical problems and PND so I'm probably not the best one to comment on that, but all in all, I must say that Jacob transitioned very very well! We couldn't be more pleased and I often tell myself on my down days that we prepared him well for Ruby's arrival. It's hard when they are both crying at once and you really have to be on your toes and prioritise about things - and leave the unimportant things!!! I guess you need to be able to think on your feet a lot and you eventually find a way of doing things that works out ok.

We'll have a bigger gap than you're aiming for (22m) so I don't know if I'll be much help to you on some of these things but...

1. We have a small umbrella stroller for K and we'll be using the Hug A Bub for J.

2. K's not ready for a single/toddler bed yet so we'll be keeping him in his cot. J will sleep in a bassinette for a few weeks and then we'll buy him cot that can convert to a single bed.

3. Same as Mel - We'll be getting a maxi rider car seat for K and just turning our current convertible one back around to the newborn position for J.

Have you had a look at the thread Coping strategies and hints for small age gaps? I've found things quite tiring at times but you find ways of working around it. One of the hardest things for me has been dealing with changing dirty nappies and having m/s at the same time LOL!

HTH.

Kim, I have 19 months between my boys. I find this a good age gap for us - it keeps me very busy but Jack was a little bit independent so just old enough, but not too old to be jealous IYKWIM.

We also have the Phil & Teds E3 although Tom doesn't go in it often, mostly he is in the sling and Jack in the pram. Jack can walk quite a distance but I prefer him in the pram when at shopping centres etc, as it is hard keeping him safe and looking after Tom too. You have to remember that sometimes you will have to feed the baby or go to the toilet so you have to make sure you can keep both kids safe at these times.

We put Jack in a bed with a guard rail and that worked well for us, but then Jack has always been a great sleeper anyway. I know of others who have tried a bed with an older child than Jack and had problems. I would think that below 15 months would most likely be too young for a bed, but it does depend on the child.

We also bought the maxi rider for Jack and put Tom in the convertible seat that Jack had been in. You shouldn't need two convertible seats as your oldest should be ok in a forward facing seat by then, depends on weight really.

I agree that coping with a toddler while being pg is VERY difficult. Especially with tiredness and ms. I think Jack was old enough that he could entertain himself for periods while I was unwell, but it is still difficult. THe first weeks with a baby and toddler were also very difficult. We still have our moments but I wouldn't change a thing! Do bear in mind though that at 11months your oldest might not be walking yet, or only just. Jack was walking really well by the time Tom arrived and this is a huge help. Carrying two at once is very hard work!

Good luck. I love having the boys close in age. But I'm not sure I would have coped with a gap of less than one year!!

Kim, i have 20 months apart between Madison and Charlotte and a couple days ago i thought i was pregnant ( i could still be) eerrkk.

I have a 3 -wheeler pram that has a toddler seat that attachs to it at the front.

We had a bassinet for Charlotte for the first few months, and Madison went into a bed soon after Charlotte was born with a bed rail.

Car seats- we had a car seat in both of our cars, so i turned the turn-a-tot around, and Madison went into the other car seat, but now i have to go and buy another car seat for Madison as she has grown out of her car seat, and i just had to replace Charlottes car seat and got a safe n sound.

The age gap is great, Madison will keep her self ammused for a while playing with her toys and they both sleep durning te day at the same time, so i have time to my self. Madison has just started childcare 1 day a week, so this gives me time with Charlotte by our selfs.

Hello! 13 months here between DD and DS. Here's what we're doing re your questions:

1. We have the Phil and Ted's E3 too. I love it and it is my saviour. Having said that though, DS still love the Baby Bjorn too, so if he gets restless I pop him in that. Unfortunately he doesn't get top see too much underneath in the E3!

2. We were unsure too but ended up buying a 2nd cot. DD is a little girl and we won't be rushing moving her to a bed too soon, although she is a monkey and the only thing stopping her climbing out is the fact she sleeps in sleeping bags!

3. We own a capsule and just investigating what to buy for when DS grows out of that!

Good luck. Life is busy but fun!

i have an age diff of 14m between #2 and #3.


1. Pram-would be need a double pram? We didnt end up buying one until DD was nearly 3 months old, so bought a 3 wheeler with a toddler seat. Its ok for running around the shops, but on long day trips is very hard.

2. Cot-would we need another or would DD be old enough to go into a single bed with safety rails? DD was in a cradle until nearly 5 months, so we put her into the cot when declan seemed ready to go into a bed (he went into a bed quite happily at 16 months)

3. Car seat-I assume we would need another convertable seat?? Depending on Chelsea's age and size, she might be ready for a 5 point harness seat - not necessarily a convertible. The new baby would be able to have the convertible.

Also for those who have small age gaps.....how did you cope being PG with a young child...and then afterwards when it was born? It was very hard being pregnant with such a young child (i also had a 2.5 year old) but it is doable :)

Good Luck!!

Thanks ladies for your help. I have let DH have a read and now we are still confused. I just dont know if the age gap is going to be enough.....but in our hearts its what we want to do. I dont want people saying 'Gee couldnt u have waited til Chelsea was a bit older' etc...

It seems most people wait a good 14-18 months between children...

There is an 18mth age gap between 3 and 4 ( only 6 mins between 1 and 2 LOL)
I use and still do a side by side twin pusher, did use a sling when #4 was little

As I had twins first I already had two cots, #3 has just gone into a todler bed now ( at 3)

We had two car seats which they both still sit in to this day.

rest when bubs rests for coping being pg whilst you have a little one.

Dont feel guilty about the choice of having them close together, if this is what you want go for it, you will cope no matter how old they are.

I agree with Vanita Kim. In the Oct baby bellies group Kate has about 15months between her girls, and Kirsty has 13 months. I am sure they would both say they love the small gap (but do find it busy LOL). Do whatever feels right for you. Bear in mind that not everyone has the choice of having them so close. When bfing AF can take a while to return. We were OTL (Open to Life, not using contraception) from very early on after Jack but AF didn't return for 7 months and then it took 3 cycles to conceive. I'm still considering another one quite soon (no AF yet, but again OTL atm) so it can't be that bad!

Im not BF so AF may return sooner then if i was. I was a good girl for the first 6 weeks and did use contraception... :D but now as u put it... we are OTL now too. I guess nature will take its turn when the time is right. If it happens it happens....if its 2, 3, 4 months down the track, so be it.

Thanks for your advice everyone

Hey Kim,

We are thinking of TTC#2 very soon too... but are having the same questions... so thanks for the thread!!!

We have the Phil & Ted's e3 too, so I am safe in that department, and saying that I love it... especially now that I am working in a baby store I see how many people are coming in to look at them as a second pram!

Good Luck with TTC and I hope that your happy with you decision!

Mel

Ive been looking at these prams everyone is referring too....and for the life of me i cant believe how silly they look. I feel sorry for the poor kid that gets stuck underneath????

Goodluck with TTC #2 Mel, at least your DD is older then mine before you considered the next one!

But as ive been told....it may be a while before the next is concieved....all depends on good ol' AF and her return. Be my luck it will be soon....anyhow if thats the case then DH and i will be over the moon!

Hey Kim... I thought the exact same thing when I saw them the first time... it took me 48 hours of discussions with DH and making him come and see the pram before I actually bought it! But they are definatley the greatest pram IMO!!