Testimonial on the power of Goals when it comes to childbirth.
Most people would probably not think of child birth as something that requires an understanding of how to set and achieve goals in your life. But achieving success in any area of life requires an understanding of what it means to set, focus on and pursue a goal, in the face of whatever circumstances or opposition may come your way.
My daughter had to be delivered as a caesarean baby because she was lying in the breech position and the midwives and doctors at the hospital could not deliver her. The reason: the required medical skills were no longer kept up. There was no encouragement to try labour as all the fears of what could go wrong kept being brought up by the doctors and midwives. My husband and I did not have access to the computer nor were we able to find any encouraging and supportive articles or stories on other women who had been successful in delivering a breech baby naturally. So I accepted having a caesarean. My daughter was born and I thank the angels that she is healthy and here.
When I found out I was pregnant with my son, at age 38, I was determined that this time I would take charge and I set a goal to have a natural birth and I made a committed decision, with my husband’s full support, that I was going to stick to my intention and not buckle to any pressure from the medical profession or anyone else.
I now had computer access and the internet and was able to find supporting articles and stories about birthing a baby naturally after having a caesarean. I searched for magazines and books too, but there was not much about VBACs. The only information I could find came sitting in front of the computer searching the internet. I couldn’t just take the stories away and read them at my own leisure, in bed, in a comfy chair in the lounge room, a park, at the beach, because there was just nothing published.
I was amazed to learn the medical profession now considered me as having a “High Risk” pregnancy. But again, I could not give in to fear. My husband stood by me and told me everything would be fine and to just stay calm and keep focused on my goal: a successful natural childbirth and a healthy baby.
During the second and third trimester hospital visits, the midwives were very supportive of a VBAC although they did insist that I would have to be monitored with belts and so slightly restricted with movement, and pointed out that if I went passed my due dates the risk of another caesarean would be raised.
I had to stand my ground on certain tests during the pregnancy too, one of which was the glucose test. I didn’t agree with the way the tests were done and so came up against brick walls basically when I said “no” to the tests. I didn’t agree with fasting all night, then having to go in and drink a 250ml bottle of glucose and sit around for an hour and have blood taken only to then be told that my blood sugar levers were raised. “Well of course they would be raised,” I said, “The glucose drink was the only thing I’d had!”
This wrangling over tests and my refusal to be poked and prodded unless absolutely essential was met with some stern reactions from doctors, so we looked around until we found a more open-minded doctor, one who supported me rather than simply lecturing and criticizing me. “I know what I want!” I told them.
As this was my last pregnancy, I approached it almost with battle flags, on some issues I had to stand my ground, on others I was left alone.
For the last three weeks before EDD, I had been feeling the Braxton Hicks contractions. I had actually never had true labour from the beginning as my first two babies were induced and my daughter was the caesarean. This is why I took the approach that “I'm going into labour no matter what - and that includes going over hospital protocol dates if need be.”
Of course every day I was vigilant that this little guy moved about. When it happened, I had to be stronger than ever. They tried to make me lie down so I could be monitored by machines, but I knew I needed to move, so I made a decision and tore free of their machines. With my husband’s support, we went on without electronic monitoring, relying on my ability to read what I was feeling inside my body as the source of information. And the delivery was word-perfect, a healthy little boy emerging into the world like a gift from above. He was the goal in human form, he was the achievement.
He was a big baby so it was automatically assumed that he had high glucose levels and that he had to be tested for the first three days of his life. This I was very unhappy with and did not agree to, but hospital protocol overrode my decisions. Still it was a minor thing, because I had remained consistent and true to the goal I had set at the start, and my faith and persistence had seen me through.
I absolutely support any woman who feels she has to miss an appointment to avoid being harassed, if she feels she has to, but what I really feel strongly is that she should go armed with the right knowledge and face them anyway. Go armed with a goal, for the goal of what you intend for yourself and your child is the real key to success. Goals are powerful ideas and ideas override the so called facts.
That would start paving the way for more women to feel comfortable about confronting sensitive issues with doctors and Obstetricians and empower them to stand up for their birthing rights without agreeing sheepishly to unnecessary and unwanted medical intervention.
Today, 1 in 3 births are caesarean in Australia. In the U.S, caesareans are also on the increase and are higher than they should be. The skills are being lost because of medical intervention. I cannot grasp how doctors and Obstetricians are just all too willing to allow mothers to have major abdominal surgery, knowing full well the risks are way higher than if a woman was fully supported to give birth naturally. But I do know that a woman who knows how to set goals in her life and go forward, believing in her own potential and the power of her goals, can achieve almost anything.
