7 weeks pregnant and scared

Hi guys,

Well, i had my ultrasound last tuesday and all is well, no need to worry about an ectopic thank god.

I went to the hospital today to have a chat to the midwives and have a look around the hospital. also to gain info.

I've got two kids, both via c-section and was really hoping for a natural birth this time around if at all possible. It looks like i might not get to decide. I've been to 2 docs so far and both have said that they wont let me go into labor, it has to be a c-section :wall:

the midwife i spoke to has given me the name and number of an ob who isn't cut happy and may let me labor first. apparently he only does a c-section if its absolutely necessary. he's very much pro natural if it can happen.

anyway, i got the info pamphlets, was walking out to the car and burst into tears. no idea why. it stopped pretty quickly though, so i was composed before i got back in the car. my OH and kids were in there and my kids dont know im preg so i didn't want to be too much of a mess lol. i dont want to tell the kids until after im 13 weeks, just in case.

so, if i've been through it all before, why in gods name am i so scared??????

im doing okay, although morning sickness is a killer.

so, am i the only one? or is it natural to be scared out of your wits? lol

Jenna

Jenna, I'd say what you're feeling is completely natural and nothing to be embarassed about. After all, every pregnancy is different, and I was just as freaked out by some things this time around as I was with the first! I think the thing that gets us all is that the whole thing is so unpredictable and out of our control - there really is nothing much we can do besides eat healthy, look after ourselves etc to influence the outcome of things. We have lots of info about all the things that can go wrong and it's natural to worry about them from time to time I guess. Pregnancy hormones are probably also stuffing with you a bit! Take it easy, let yourself be freaked and talk to your DP. All the best for a healthy pregnancy!

Im on number 2... and i think im more scared cos i know whats going to happen this time round... where as with DD i had no idea!!

Yeah - its a bit of a mind spinner isn't it? I'm still not sure whether the idea of labour is better or worse at the moment. After all, I know what it will be like now LOL!

I think the idea of 'knowing' is worse... but can hopefully change how this labour goes v's my last one IYKWIM... like what i would/wouldnt do, want to try etc...
They say it gets easier.....i loved my first one... 10 hrs but i slept 6 of them....so heres to hoping its nice and easy again!!

Hi Jenna,
I don't blame you for feeling scared, being told that you will not get a choice about the way you birth your baby is very disempowering and just plain wrong if you ask me. It takes away any control that you have. I really hope that you can find an alternate OB who is pro VBAC. In the recommend a midwife/Ob thread Kelly has posted with a link to an article with a list of Obs in different states who are pro VBAC.
I too really want a VBAC and hope, hope, hope that I get an Ob who is supportive.

I'll have a look for the thread, thankyou.

Also, this might sound really stupid, but why am i not fitting into some of my pants. surely i cant be showing yet. i thought maybe im a bit bloated, but it doesn't feel that way.

thanks for the posts guys, you've helped lots.

you'll probably be sick of me by the time this is all done. 7 down, 33 to go (if im lucky)

Jenna

hi jenna this is my 1st preg so i cant compare the feelings you are having and wh it is harder this time... i think it is prob bc you feel disempowered as all the care providers you have spoken to have an opinion diff to yours about what you should do for the birth... i hope you do find a pro VBAC OB if that is what you want so much. you are prob overly emotional bc of the hormones etc, i know i was quite teary about nothing at all (let alone dealing with the disappointing outcomes of yuor discussions on VBAC) in the 1st tri. I hope you have a happy and healthy preg, will be exciting when you can tell your kids and enjoy!
BTW I also didnt 'show' for some time but clothes got tight v early i think due to bloating...

Hey Jenna :) You might not fit into your pants cos many people stretch faster the more babies they have - like your uterus goes, here we go again, better make room. Or you might be retaining more fluid with this one, or...any other number of variables.
Since every pregnancy is different, it could be anything.

And obviously I don't really know your medical situation, but the Ob who isn't cut happy sounds good - that way if they say you need a C-sec, you can be more sure that it's necessary, as opposed to being just what the Ob prefers.

All the best with everything.

Hey Jenna,

Without knowing why you had your previous c/s's, there are a couple of good articles about VBAC on the BellyBelly site and there are plenty of other internet sites around with info on the safety of vaginal birth after caesarean. It may be worth doing your research before going to see an OB so you feel more knowledgeable about what you are talking about and more able to take back control of your pregnancy. Read the VBAC birth stories and be inspired by them. If it is what you want, then fight for it!

Remember, 'they' don't let you labour, your body does it anyway. It is 'they' who must ask for your permission before they can cut you. ;)

Well said!

Hi Jenna
Just a quick comment on your potential CS. It’s your body they can’t cut it unless you agree.

Now for your scary feeling. Yes it is normal. You are growing a brand new human being, it is an incredible responsibility. You have every right to be scared. Also by now your hormones are starting to build up. This is another thing that can make you emotional.

Not fitting into your pants. Normal. Your body is starting to make extra blood. By about 37 weeks you will have up to 80% extra blood running through your body. For some women this extra blood production doe not start until a little later in pregnancy.

Jenna - I also didn't fit into my pants quite quickly this time around. I was in maternity pants from 12 weeks and my jeans etc were getting uncomfy from about 10 weeks! I was horrified, but was assured that it was perfectly normal. All your muscles are probably not as taut and teriffic as they used to be after already having had "a stretching"!!! LOL!

Okay, so it sounds as if the 'too snug' feeling with the pants is normal lol

My previous c-sections were for scarey reasons. my son was born at 26.5 weeks due to physical strain. umm it wasn't anything i did, it was what was done to me. i suppose you could call is physical trauma. they did everything to stop it, but in the end, bub was in trouble so they did a c-section. my daughter was a c-section because my doctor wanted to get back to his anniversary party. i got my notes and read them all, spoke to all the midwives etc and even they agreed that a c-section shouldn't have been done. im not happy about it, but at least i have a very healthy 8yo girl.

im soooo emotional. had a big argument with my DH last night. i think it was upsetting me that he wasn't showing any interest at all, or thats how it seemed to me.

anyway, thanks for all the well wishes, and i'll keep you updated!

Jenna

PS. Will this morning sickness end? lol i dont remember it being this bad last time lol

Aww hugs Jenna, my dh didn't seem particularly interested til I got a belly, and then especially when he could feel the baby move - I think while it was feeling very real for me, he found it hard to be a part of it when there was nothing to show for it...does that make sense?

As for morning sickness...eugh, it feels like you'll be sick for the rest of your life hey. I don't know when yours will end...but it can't last forever can it? (lol, that was my pregnancy mantra...I won't be sick forever, I won't waddle forever, I won't be in maternity clothes forever...:p)

So sorry to hear you are having trouble with DH - I sometimes feel like mine isn't all that interested either. I know he is intellectually , but he doesn't show it the way I would - men are weird! I hope the emotional bit gets easier for you too! You have a big family, it must be an emotional drain just keeping up with "normal" life, let alone a pregnancy! :hugs: Just think of the lovely little package you will be holding in a few months time!