22 Months Old and still not SLEEPING AT NIGHT!!!

Hi,

I have a 22 month old son who has been a dreadful sleeper from day one. He is in a big bed as baby number two is on the way and due in October. He wakes 5-6 times a night crying out for mummy or daddy. I have spoken with a nurse who said routine is the key. I believe he has always been in a good routine. His routine now is bed at 7:30pm. He is a great sleeper during the day giving his day care mum 2-3 hours at about midday. The thing is he will go to bed fine, no crying, screaming, just reading a book, kisses, we leave the door open, he doesn't come out and we don't hear another peep until my head hits that pillow, then it starts. Can anyone out there please give me some tips. He has had a dummy for sleeping only which I decided last night that was it, no more dummy so WE threw it in the bin. He hasn't asked for it since. When he does I say to him "remember we put your dummy in the bin, you're a big boy now, big boys don't need a dummy" and he seems to be fine with this. I thought the main reason he was waking all the time at night was because he lost his dummy.... I am becoming quite exhausted, I work full time, am 24 weeks pregnant and need sleep but my son is just not allowing it. Magazines that I have read have ALL said your bub could sleep through anywhere between 6months and 18 months... WHEN WILL HE SLEEP THREW... HELP ME!!! :pray:

Micky xxoo

Remember all kids are different there is no set time line for them to sleep thru. Mackenzie was a great sleeper until she hit 13 months and she is now 3 and still dosn't sleep thru the night. I hear you re the exhaustion thing. We took the dummy off Mackenzie too but ended up giving it back as we couldn't get her back to sleep when she woke up. Some nights she wakes only once others 3 times and maybe 1 in 10 she will sleep thru. I've tried to explain if she wakes to roll over and go back to sleep but she has a huge imagination and tells me that Buzz (as in lightyear) and Woody are shining the sun in her eyes or all the farm animals are waking her up (she lives in the persona of Milly from New MacDonalds farm). My neice was 3 before she slept thru and my DH's sister was 10! Some nights Mackenzie will sit up and talk for 1.5 hours. She has stopped screaming out to us at night but now walks into our room so I just take her hand and lead her back to bed. We need to jump in her bed with her and 99% of the time this way she goes straight back to sleep and we all get some rest. I usually wake up an hour later with pins and needles in my arm and then walk blurry eyed back to our bed. I know this isn't the best way but it works for us and we all get our sleep. We too are having another bub (only 9 more sleeps!) and I'm wondering what we are going to do - I guess we will just take one each and hope for the best! No answers for you - maybe you can get his carer to cut out his sleep and see how that goes. He may still need it every few days to catch up or it may make him overtied and worse - just a thought.

I have a little boy (16 months) who also is a dreadful sleeper. I now just accept him for who he is and try not to let it get to me. I have baby number 2 due in November so would love some nights of sound sleep but I have decided it will come when he is ready. We've been to sleep school and it didn't work, he has a very strict bedtime routine, bath at 7. bottle and in bed by 7.30 every night. He goes to sleep OK but just cn't stay asleep. Most nights it is only one wake up call and we've gone back to giving him a bottle o/n to get him back to sleep. Might be against all the rules but it works for us. I keep telling myslef it won't last forever but I desperately hope that has has his night sleeps sorted by the time his sister arrives! Good luck, try to hang in there. I know it feels like everyone else has a perfect sleeping baby but those of us who don't are out there and we understand how you feel.

What do you do when he calls out for you??

My only suggestion is this.. ignore him.. He is fine.. I know it is hard.. I finally had to do the ignore thing with my 3rd son and I was amazed at how quickly it worked. it took about a week and he stoped it. He has started waking again recently but thats only because he is cold.. We either get up and cover him again but usually take him back to our bed which really isn't ideal . I do find if I growl (get cranky) a little he goes back to sleep

Good luck

We should all start a club!!!

Jo

What about trying to cut down his daytime sleep by an hour or so? I found with James if he was allowed to sleep too long during the day at daycare, he'd take ages to actually go to sleep in the evening (he'd just chat to himself in bed for hours) and I had a chat to his carers and asked them to get him up when the other kids woke so he only got an hour - that seemed to do the trick. He would sleep for around 3 hours if you let him when he was around 2 years old. BUT, that kid loves his sleep!!

Thanks everyone for your replies, please keep them coming, I need all the help I can get. My son has never really been one to actually call out "mummy or daddy" directly, he wakes up crying / screaming everytime he wakes. I don't really know what would happen if I ignored him in the middle of the night, I am assuming he would walk into us. I keep a night light on in his bedroom (very dimly lit) and the toilet light on with the door closed just in case he does get up, so he doesn't run into the wall. I know I should just accept him for who he is and the fact that he isn't a great sleeper but I just get so very frustrated, especially when my head has just hit that pillow after a long day at work...blah, blah, blah. I am sitting here typing listening to him scream because he has decided he doesn't want to go to bed tonight so I have decided to leave him (it's been 10 minutes - lets see how long it will last - within reason of course)! I know all kids are different and they all reach milestones etc. at different times in their lives but how am I going to do it with two!!! I certainly know that there will be changes with sleeping routines etc. when number 2 comes along. Well I better be off, I can here him coming down the hallway - screaming at the same time.... Thanks everyone... xxoo:redface:

Oh Micky I feel your pain. Alexzander is a little bit older than your DS, but we have a similar issue. We had around 5 months of reasonable sleep from 18-23 months then it fell apart again. I get up at least 4 times a night, sometimes heaps heaps more. The only difference is that he calls out "muuummeeeeeee" and gets louder if I ignore him, then he starts crying.

I wonder though how your son is when he wakes up? You say he is screaming.... Like scared screaming or just crying? Does he respond to you when you talk to him or does he still seem sort of asleep? When you cuddle him, does it calm him down? Just trying to get a picture as there may be something else there rather than just bad sleeping.

The word for it is probably crying, not terror screaming.. and he does seem still 1/2 asleep when he is doing this as well. Over the last week he has been sleeping okay - mainl waking at about 2:00am (which gives me at least 5 hours straight sleep), he then comes into our room (not in our bed)... We have made a bed on the floor which he will sleep in until about 4:00am and then he comes in with us... So we are coping, doing what we need to do to get some decent sleep!!! Will keep you all updated!

Micky xxoo :pray:

How are you going on this Mickyndan? Gosh, reading this thread is like my story (yes, it is 3.35am!!)

My boy is nearly 14 months old and is also a rough sleeper. The WORST thing is he goes to sleep fine and always has but wakes at around 2-3am and whines for hours. We tried the no-cry method till about 8 months when I cracked it and went full on CC with him - that worked within a night for about 2 weeks but then he got sick so we cuddled him heaps for a few months. Gosh its all a blur but we have been letthim him cry for 2-3 mins then checking him and cutting out night bottles and letting him go for 5-10 mins but he still wakes! About 1 in 10 he sleeps thru. It is so hard because sometimes if I go to him straight away when he cries he will roll over and sleep and only wake that one time, other times going to him straight away only revs him up. We've tried co-sleeping (he thinks it is a game) and cuddling him to sleep (it agitates him, even if I rock him for 30 mins) and restricting fluids after 4pm (sounds bad but he drinks heaps during the day and we found if he had late night drinks he would pee through everything once or twice a night without fail). But I have gone back to a 3am bottle last few nights.

Ramble ramble ramble. Sorry to hijack thread here Mickyndan but I have tried so long to do this without asking for help and I am sick of it. Worst thing is I am 22 weeks pg and worrying what is going to happen with #2 arrives!!!

ETA: Flynn really is perfect in all other respects, and realy goes to sleep well. He was actually that good and slept so well and often during the first 3 months I worried he was autistic!! Is not sleeping the price I have to pay for an otherwise placid nature?? I am kinda hoping #2 is demon-child during the day but one of those mythical 10-12 hour sleepers at night LOL!!!

ETA #2 : the milk I gave him seems to have worked - maybe he needs it? worth I try I guess.........

ETA#3 : Nope, he is talking to himself now. At least he's not cryin LOL!

If it is any consolation to anyone, here I am, my champion sleepers have ALL been up in the night tonight.........I have been up and down and round about to ALL 3 off the little tackers from 1.32am this morning till now..........as soon as I get one settled, another one goes off. NFI what is going on...........

Lucy, it is a conspiracy - they are out to get you! You and DH are outnumbered - run away while you still can!!!

Can't you tell I am insanely tired ;) LOL