Symptoms disappeared, testing tomorrow

I'm going mental.

I'm 12/13 DPO (ovulation was at night). I'm testing tomorrow morning. I've tested twice already - it was early, I know, but as we all know there's a chance of getting a positive before your period's due. I've even bought a second brand of test in case the brand I've been using just doesn't 'work' for me.

I'm scared of getting another negative tomorrow. According to the wonderful Fertility Friend FAQs, there's a 60% chance of getting a positive on your period due day if you're pregnant. I want to be reassured by knowing there's still a 40% chance that I'm pregnant if I don't get those two lines tomorrow but I'm so exhausted from waiting.

I had decent symptoms from 6DPO though to 10/11 DPO but now they've disappeared. I've got almost nothing to reassure me apart from the possible implantation spotting I had at 6DPO and a little bit of mucus now - I've read that you get that if you're pregnant, but not if you're about to get your period.

On top of all the worry about getting another negative, there's also the possibility my period will come along to confirm things with its taunting bloody display. "You lose, nyah nyah nyah." I'm trying to decide if I'm going to be practical and stock up on pads as well as HPTs. The thought is so depressing.

And this is only my first cycle of TTC. I'm going to be a nutcase if we become a LT-TTC couple.

Writing this had made me think that if I get a negative tomorrow and no preiod maybe I should take that next step - a blood test at the doctor. It would answer my question, right? But then I could still get my period after a positive blood test.

I really needed to share all this with someone other than Hubby (who's done a lot of listening in the last month or five). The majority of you will have been through this more than once and understand how I'm feeling today. What helped you through this?

Wow, I've completely calmed down in the half-hour since I wrote that. This is not my only chance to have a baby. If it doesn't happen this cycle, we can try again in a few weeks. Everything will be okay. Keep breathing!

Hi Vestalvagrant

Honey, relax and enjoy the journey ..... I know you're going to hate me for saying that because there is nothing worse than TTC'ers hearing the words "relax and it will happen". I was lucky enough to get a BFP on our 4th attempt (4th month) and believe it or not, it was the only month I didnt get ANY symptoms. The first 3 months I was convinced I was pregnant then on the 4th month, I stopped temping, stopped counting the days, stopped imagining symptoms and got the BFP.

Good luck tomorrow .....

couldnt of said it better myself. RELAX!!!!!!! :)
It doesnt matter how many kids you have, its always the same apprehension (s) when falling pregnant. You do need to relax and not think about it night and day because it wont happen till you stop thinking about it. Just knowing how your body works and when you ovulate is all you need. Bd like crazy when you ovulate and let nature do the rest.
Good luck.

Thanks girls. I've only had negative tests including today, and am sitting on 'No Period, No Positive' at 15DPO. Sigh.

Tonydahl - I can completely relate to being convinced my symptoms meant pregnancy. I'm going to be much more cynical next cycle!

Not totally over yet, but all the best next cycle Vestalvagrant if this one isnt it.