Cosleeping ... Feeding to sleep ... And other issues!

Hello!

My 5 month old has been co sleeping with me since birth. She wakes up at least 5-6 times during the nitght for a feed and sometimes will decide that 3am is her play time and will play for 2-3 hours! This is not the issue though.

I am trying to transfer her to sleep in her cot. I have been feeding her to sleep in my arms and then when asleep placing her in the cot. *as soon as I put her down* she wakes up immediatly. She has started holding onto my clothes so she can feel when I am not there.

The past few days she has only been content to go to sleep laying in my bed and feeding herself to sleep there. If I go to get out of the bed, she immediatly wakes and screams. If I lay next to her or hold her when she is asleep she will have 2-3 hours, otherwise 5 mins if we are lucky!

Any suggestions from those that have successfully weaned from cosleeping ?

Thanks alot in advance!
Jen

OMG you are exactly describing my life right now. My boy feeds all night and I try to get him into his cot and he's awake 10 mins later again.

He's awake in my bed right now coz i've just left out of there. It's been driving me crazy but I don't know what to do.

Hi Jen, I have done the same thing as you with both of my kids. Its quite hard to get a bub to sleep on their own when they have been sleeping beside you from birth. With my son Liam, who is now 9mths old, I would feed him to sleep then put him into his basinette beside our bed. When he was young, he would be fine with this, and wouldn't wake up until his next feed. Now that he's older, he still loves to sleep beside me in bed (being fed to sleep), but I decided it was time he went to his own cot in his own room. If my husband or I turned in our sleep, he would wake up, and we wanted him to have a better, undisturbed sleep (the same with us).
Anyway, we have had to resort to a sort of controlled crying with him.
We have some music playing in his room, and a night light.
When its time for bed, I give him one last feed. When he starts getting sleepy, I put him into his cot and pat him on the bum for a while, or rest my hand on his back (depending how upset he is at being put down). When he's quiet, I leave the room.
If he cries, I just go back and pat/reassure him.
He sometimes even cries himself to sleep.
I have found if he's in his own cot/room, he sleeps A LOT better than if he's near us.
Babies get frightened when they fall asleep on their nice warm comfy mummy, only to find themselves alone and definitely not where they fell asleep! Its kind of like us falling asleep on the couch and waking to find yourself in the bath or something (I saw this on a baby sleep DVD!)
I hope this is of some help to you!

Hi Jen

My DD is 4 1/2 months old and she has been co-sleeping with us too. About a week ago, we started putting her in her cot, which is next to our bed, with one side down, so that if she cries or anything, I can still get to her. So far it seems to be working.

When she is a bit bigger, we will put the fourth side back on the cot, then gradually move the cot further away from the bed. Hope it works...

I have been through the same thing - not necessairly weaning from co-sleeping to the cot, but just the fact that Blake loved to wake up as soon as he hit the mattress.

We've introduced a security item. It's one of those little blankets with an animal on top (ours is a puppy) from Best and less. I feed him and let him touch and feel and cuddle it, I then put it in his hand near his face then place him in the cot. If he wakes as soon as he goes down, I put the blanket up to his face and he settles back down nicely. He's gone from waking 5+ times a night, to waking once or twice, and when placed into the cot asleep he doesn't wake up very often. In conjunction, we've put a CD player in his room and are using the sounds of silence CD, it has sounds like heartbeats, vacuums etc, all natural noises. The continuous noise helps Blake to resettle himself, imagine your DD waking up to a stark, quiet room after being close to you and hearing your heartbeat since in the womb, she'd get quite a fright.

HTH, I'm no expert, just suggesting what is starting to work for us :)

I have also had success with the blanket with pooh bear on it. I feed Kane while he holds it, then lay him down at bed time with it and he plays with it till he falls asleep. He only gets it at bed time, so he knows i'm leaving him to sleep. He goes down 2 hrs after a feed, before he's tired and cranky, and he drifts off. NOTE: Had more success when the teddy smells like mummy. Wear blanky for awhile and bubba will love cuddlying it cause it smells like you!!!

Jodie, I agree, and forgot to add, to make it smell like you, after all the point is for it to "repace" you in a sense.

Caro: at the moment she is sleeping in my bed, as she just would not go in the cot. However this morning she slept in the cot for about 40 mins which was good for her! I was prund of her.

Our big problem is if I cosleep next to her during the day and feed her off to sleep. As soon as I get out of bed, she wakes and wont go back unless i refeed her etcetc.. I end up having to lay in bed with her for 2 hours to let her have a decent sleep! I am getting nothing done !!

Thanks to everyone for your suggestions. I will go out and get one of those cuddle bears tomorrow that might just do the trick. I might also start putting her to bed before she gets to cranky. Its all trial and error isnt it!

Hmm good point Caro about the cuddle bear, I'd never forgive myself if something happened .. my bubby is only 5 months.
I could possibly let her have the bear while she settled and take it out before I leave the room maybe ??

I can't see a little blanket/cuddle rug being any more dangerous than a blanket on the bed? As far as Blake is concerned anyway, as he happily plays peek a boo and can take something off his face when he doesn't want it there. I guess if your DD can't do this I wouldn't put anything in with her just yet, but this has been suggested to me by paeds, GP's and sleep experts so I think I'm pretty safe.

Its difficult when lots of people offer different suggestions and they are all apparently experts!! I think i will try the cuddly to settle her she would probably just cuddle it for comfort or throw it at me in rage on of the two hehe and ill just take it out when shes asleep

Jen, my little man likes to hold a cloth nappy (the flat ones). When I put him down I lay it across his arm and he grabs it and sometimes sucks it a little but normally just holds it. It's cotton and he can breath through it if he puts it over his face which sometimes he does. It's also good if it's a little chilly cos I can place it over his legs...lol. The good thing about the nappy too is I can just keep changing them and washing them. He NEVER has the same one for a whole day really as I use them to wipe his face etc during feeding times. So he's not getting attached to one item ;)

Glad I read this thread too. Jen - hope you find something that works its so hard isn't it. I have one of those cuddle bears and never thought of using it :doh: or taking it out when she falls asleep - although as Ash says it doesnt seem much different than a blanket on the bed - I worry about her shoving too much of anything in her mouth and not being able to get it out though and that includes her sleeping bag which is on her!

I was having the same sort of problems. I never co-slept but my DD was so used to sleeping on me from having to be upright with reflux issues that when that settled down she wasn't at all happy about sleeping on her own. I had the same sort of idea as Ash and Jodie, although bit different. I would "wear" her little body suit on my upper arm (put your arm through the bottom and out the neck hole) for the morning/afternoon so it ended up smelling like me. I then changed her nappy and changed her into that body suit before giving her a feed and putting her down for a nap. She smelled me on the clothes she was wearing and that seemed to work well. I also agree with the others that if your DD can pick up toys/objects then she can get the little snuggle blanket off her face - they're not big enough that she could somehow manage to get both ends wrapped under her little body and over her face, so I really wouldn't worry about smothering issues.