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Circumcising issue...
Hi just wondering what your views are on circumcision???
When i was preg with my first we didnt want to know what we were having but still discussed the possibility of having either sex. One of the first conversations i had with DP was if we had a boy he wanted bubs to get done as he was and as were all the men in his family. We had discussed it with our GP who had informed us that of the fact that it wasnt a necessary procedure and all the info we needed but accepted our decision and told us to get info from the hospital or see a pediatric surgeon.
After having our bubs and having a beautiful boy, we asked the staff at the hospital for info- I was abused by the midwife for even compemplating the decision and she just walked away and when the on duty doc came in to do routine checks we also asked him for info- He also abused me and informed me that my son when 18 could sue me for the loss of skin and refused to help in anyway. I realise many people have different views on this and there are many differing reasons for and against.
I dont expect people to agree with our decision but i did expect some respect and help when it came to making an informed decision and in the end it was our decision. If we were jewish it would be for religious reasons and it is seen as the norm. I felt discriminated against, wrongly treated and felt like we were horrible parents.
After having no help from the hospital we went to see a P/Surgeon who without judgement agreed to do the surgury but only when bubs was 12 months old as he would need to go under anesthetic. (also he needed skin tags removed which the hospital also didnt want to know about) After the surgury everything went well and we have had no problems ever since. Now we are epecting again not sure what sex but if it is a boy the same will happen. I have heard there is a procedure that is done within the first few days after birth??? Not sure what is the best procedure ???
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Hi Jess - we decided to have our ds done and had a similar experience to you in our public hospital. Luckily our nephews had been done so we knew where to go anyway, and took our 6 day old into a day procedure clinic to have a rubber ring put around there. It didn't bother him at all, he was taken from us for a total of 3 minutes while they did it and was calm when he came back. Didn't bother him when we cleaned it each nappy change or in the bath, and it fell off a few days later. There is only1 doctor here in Adelaide who does this procedure, so I don't know where you live if you'll be able to find someone. This time around I'm going to a private hospital and the same doctor actually goes there to do it while you're still in there which makes it nice and easy (if we end up with another boy!).
It IS a very personal decision, and I completely understand why many people are opposed to it, but nobody has the right to judge one way or the other.
Good luck!
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I'm not judging, so please no body think I am. I also don't want to start war. I'm sorry you've had such bad reactions, some people can't help but judge.
Shel and I have had this conversation as she thought it was necessary, for hygiene and all that, and I don't. Personally I wouldn't do it, as I wouldn't 'circumcise' a daughter, and to me it is the same. I think a lot of people look at it like that these days, which is why you've had some really negative experiences.
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Hi
I've always thought it best to be done within days of birth. That way the baby is young enough not to be affected in everyday life & it really doesn't bother them that much.
I don't know much about it though. I personally don't want to do it. DH was not done & has always hated this & wished he was. He felt embarrassed about it when he was younger & he would like to get it done with our son. I think it is something they should be able to have a say in. If he wants it done later in life at least I'm giving him the choice.
It's something we will probably argue about for years!
I don't believe in judging anyone else though. It's a very personal choice that is done for alot of different reasons. It's totally up to you & I think you should do whatever feels right for you. You can't really do one & not the other.
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You will always get people who are totally against circumcision... so you probably have to be prepared for negative attitudes towards it.
There is no "right" or "wrong". It's totally a personal choice. Circumcisions have been performed for 1000's of years. Until the 70's most boys were circumcised - regardless of their religion... then it became unpopular... and recently it's been in the media again.
I will tell you about my experience.
My husband is Jewish - although I am not.
because I am not - then our children are not recognised as Jewish.
But when we had a son, it was important to my DH that his son be circumcised. My father and all my brothers are circ'd... and I was not against it. Although my son is not 'officially' Jewish - he will be bought up with Jewish traditions.
So... then we had to find someone to do it. Ideally we wanted a rabbi - but even the more 'relaxed' synagogues wouldn't recommend anyone. We found a Jewish doctor who was willing to do it. Then someone recommended a Rabbi who would also do it - and he agreed.
We had the 'ceremony' at home - with only my parents present. (The Jewish often make it a huge party). As per tradition - it is performed 8 days after birth.
In honesty - I was expecting it to be quite traumatic... but my son just lay on the table... and the Rabbi performed the circumcision... wrapped it all up... and it was over in minutes. My DS cried - but not screamed. And as soon as he was handed to me, we gave him his bottle... and he was fine. Stopped crying. In fact... he would cry more when we used to change his nappy.
There are a couple of methods... I think the one you refer to is called the plastibell. If you click on the links that Tanya has provided... there will be more information.
Personally... the only thing I would recommend - is if you do it - do it as soon as possible after birth. I imagine it would be a little more traumatic the longer you leave it (like months or years).
Good luck with whatever you decide. You are not horrible parents if you decided to go ahead with it.
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Popularity for circumcision comes and goes. With me I probably wouldn't and we aren't getting ds done but that is because DH isn't done either. I figure he's the man and he knows how all those bits work better than I do. he has also managed to make it 27 years with his foreskin so it can't be that bad.
I would never judge someone on their choice though, each to their own, however I can't help but feel that there is a reason for the foreskin, otherwise men may have evolved to not have one by now??
