Unstable Pelvis - Contemplating Second - Am I Mad?

I've sort of asked this before but not as specifically as I should have, hence the repetition.

I'm 38 with a four-month-old daughter. She is a delight. And all is good except that I was diagnosed with an unstable pelvis at week 28, was in pain for the rest of the pregnancy and was in a fair bit of pain for the first couple of months and am still a bit incapacitated even now. An unstable pelvis makes it painful to walk, stand or bend. Sitting down is usually fine! As I don't drive, this means I've been virtually housebound for the last four months too as I'm only allowed to go for a ten minute walk every other day. More importantly, it makes everyday tasks like cooking, cleaning, breastfeeding (can't adjust bum to get comfy when holding a baby), lifting baby, washing, pretty painful.

Basically, if it wasn't for dodgy pelvis, I would have no hesitation in trying for a second one right now but if I wasn't 38 I'd leave it for a few years to let my body recover.

Unfortunately I don't have the luxury of time. And before people start putting me in the 'silly woman who left it too late to have kids' basket, my marriage broke up when I was 32, I met my current partner when I was 36, got pregnant the second month we were together, miscarried, and got pregnant again when I was 37. So I've hardly been mucking around here watching the clouds go by!!!

I know all the dangers of leaving it too late and know that if I want another one I really need to start trying very soon.

At the moment I'm concentrating on trying to get my pelvis back together by doing physio and pilates but it's likely that the condition will also come back in pregnancy no.2 making it difficult for me to walk, stand or bend again.

By that stage my 4-month-old will be about 15 months old (presuming I can pregnant again) and about 18 months when the next baby is born.

My partner is a good man and quite helpful but as I'm not the complaining type he really doesn't understand how painful it has been and I tend to just get on with things and then explode.

My real question is how hard will it be to look after an infant of that age when I'm not meant to walk, stand or bend? Obviously I will do all those things but I will have to try to keep it to a minimum.


Sorry for the length of the post!

Hi sweetie,

I hear you on the pain! I had that with almost all of my pregnancies. Last one being the absolute worse and I am stil suffering somewhat at times. But i will still ttc next year. Your not old hon, your still in baby making age, so dont even worry about what others think. Even at 40 I think is fine if you are looking after yourself physically, mentally and spiritually. Have you ever worn a pregnancy belt? That helps heaps with a painful pelvis.

Have you spoken to a gyno about this and what alternitives there may be for you?


Don't give up hope yet ok, where theres a will there a way!

HI!

I suffered from this same condition with my 2nd pregnancy - from week 36 onwards, and had to wear a belt 24 hours a day! It was aweful.

When pregnant with my 3rd baby, I was fearful of a return - but fortunately - nothing - not even a twinge.

Hope this is helpful!

Thanks - that's very encouraging!

Hi,

I've was diagnosed with pelvic instability around twelve weeks with my second child (I didn't have any problems with my first pregnancy). My son is a very energetic 2 1/2 year old. I too have found that a pregnancy belt has helped immensely, and recently I have been wearing an elastic support bandage around my bump to support the growing baby (I'm now 33 weeks) and take some of the weight off my pelvis. I've been seeing a physiotherapist every two weeks who has prescribed stomach strengthening exercises and pelvic floor exercises, and application of ice packs twice a day (in addition to the above). All of these measures have meant that I am still mobile and have kept the pain under control enough so I can look after my son. I also make sure I keep off my feet when I can. I recommend seeing a physiotherapist at the hospital you register to have your maternity care, I haven't paid a cent as it's part of my ante-natal care (apart from for the belt which was $43).

Hope this helps you.

Hi Lotti

Unfortunately the belt/icepacks were the first thing my physio recommended but they did nothing for me and although I had physio (and should still have it), I am still in pain nine months AFTER my DD was born. In the last two weeks it's actually been getting worse - I think because my DD is getting heavier.

So now I'm looking at seeing a chiropractor.

I was in tears last weekend because it's such an awful thing to have to weigh up. It seems lunacy to start TTC when I am still in pain from first time around but I really can't wait around too long for my body to get better or I will be dicing with my fertility.

So I may just have to prepare for worst case scenario which is being wheelchair bound for the pregnancy and for a few months afterwards. I'm going to talk to DP about how much carers' leave he could potentially take and do the sums on getting in-home care.

If I had a few more years up my sleeve there would be NO WAY I'd TTC while still in pain and if I wasn't still in pain I'd be TTC tomorrow.

As I said, horrible situation and there's no perfect answer other than to keep trying to get it sorted with chiropractor/physio.

Hi Fiona,

Sorry to hear your physio's suggestions didn't work, and I hope things improve for you. Speak to your maternal and child health nurse about respite care or any other help you may be able to get, especially while pregnant.

I wish you all the best. I feel for you with your dilemma. A chiropractor may help you, a friend of mine went to see one as her pelvis was out of alignment after the birth of her son. It worked and she's fine even after the birth of another baby.

Good luck.