Help, how do I stop breastfeeding

:cryinglaugh:Hi all,

I have made the decision to stop breastfeeding. My boy has a tounge tie and severly damaged my nipples so badly that for the last 2 weeks I have been expressing my milk and feeding him via the bottle with formula in between as I cant keep up with his eating! He is thriving and put on 300g in 3 days!!

Now the problem im having is that I am complelety exhausting myself by expressing as by the time I feed him from the bottle put him down then express, I have about 45 mins to sleep. I really feel that I cannot physially nor emotionally do this any more. I have been going to the breastfeedig clinic at the hosptial who have been great and I managed to get him back on the boob two days ago and need to slowly get him back on one feed a day until nipples are better. The problem I have is that when I go there I feel pressured to keep this up so im too scared to ask them how I go about stopping my milk and just putting him on forumla now.

Ive heard that I just skip on expressing a day then increase it to two - is that right?/ But what about mastitis? Ive just spent 2 days expressing a lump out of my boob to avoid this. HELP!!!

My son is 2.5 weeks old. I have to change my ticker!!

Hi Leash
Personally I think that breastfeeding is one of the best things you can do for your baby but it can also be one of the worst things you can do. If you are not enjoying breastfeeding and it is causing you as much stress as it sounds to be then your baby will pick up on this and will also not enjoy breastfeeding as much as he should. From what you say I think you are making the right decision for you and your baby. Probably the best way to stop breastfeeding is to drop 1 feed or 1 expressing every 24 – 48 hours. You will have less chance of mastitis if you cut back slowly. If your breast gets engorged between feeds and you feel that you need to express some extra milk only express a small amount, just enough to make your breast feel comfortable. Do not throw out the expressed milk you can give this to your baby.
Signs of mastitis are usually a red area on your breast often with a lump. The red area will usually feel hotter to touch than the rest of your breast. You may also feel like you are getting a head cold or a touch of the flu. Your breast may also be quite painful. If you notice any of these symptoms go to your doctor ASAP. Mastitis can be very very painful and if left untreated it can make you very ill.

Lesh, have you considered having the tongue-tie snipped? My first DS had a tongue-tie and was totally unable to attach. We had it snipped at 3 weeks and he immediately attached. It still took about 3 weeks to totally wean him off the nipple shields at every feed as he had gotten used to feeding with them, but we went on to feed for 14 months with no further problems. In a young baby the procedure is really, really quick and simple. Apparently it's painless and there is no bleeding. It was the best thing we did.

If you do want to wean, it is best to do it one feed at a time. I would call the ABA for more information and they have a really good booklet on the topic as well. GL.

Hi Lesh,

My son also had a tongue tie and like MantaRay I had it snipped. He did not cry at all and it is done very quickly. What a difference to the feeding, it was an instant change....

Wishing you loads of luck babe, don't be hard on yourself if you don't want/can't BF don't ever feel pressed to do so... what every works for you :D xxx You sound like you are doing a great job

Hi,

My second son is tongue tied too. You have done such a fabulous job pumping for your baby - it is exhausting. The first few weeks with a new baby is nothing like any of us could ever have imagined. To add to that the double workload of pumping is really a tough gig.
I wonder if you knew that getting a tongue tie snipped was usually a very minor and simple procedure and can make a very quick and positive change? And you can get it done in Melbourne. It is really worth getting done. I can send you the details of who to contact if you like.
If you want to wean, you will need to do it gradually. Your body is in top milk production mode - it won't give up easily. Replace a feed (pumping session) with a bottle of formula every 2-3 days until the process is complete. If you feel uncomfortably full, express a little, just for comfort. Don't be tempted to let your breasts get overfull
Warm Regards
Barb

Thanks so much for your help, we have considered getting it cut and will do so in the next few weeks probably I know that it will make it easier to put him on the breast again but im just still scared about the whole thing and seeing him vomit up my blood again frightens the life out of me. I think im just at burn out piont, and my husband is back at workin a week and a bit and I really dont think I will cope on this expressing and feeding timetable I have at th emoment with my damaged breasts.

I know breast milk is better for him, I can see the difference in him sleeping when he has the breast milk compared to the formula I give him when I cant keep up with him but I already feel relief now I have made the decision.

Do I only just drop the one feed ever 24-48 hours or do I increase it as it goes on, assuming then that my body drops one feed ever day to second day so by the end of a few weeks that my body will produce less and less and dry up?/ Ive heard there are tablets you can take too - and should I be using cabbage leaves now then in between expressing.?

Many thanks, its soo good to be able to put it out there and not feel like I am being judged or a bad mother. ALthough the ABA have beena good help I still feel like the are judgmental, one help lady I spoke with told me what I was doing was second best etc etc and made me feel bad, which annyoed me as I am making a huge effort to express togive him some breast milk.

Hi Lesh
It is best to do things slowly so I would suggest that you drop 1 feed and then in 2 days time you drop another feed. keep dropping a feed every 2 days. So for example lets say that today you give 6 feeds tomorrow Sunday only give 5 feeds then Tues only give 4 feeds. And so on. This is only a guide and you may need to change to suit your personal circumstances. It is important that you do not rush this. If you do it could lead to engorgement or even mastitis.
Again and just to reinforce, your baby drinking some of your blood will not cause him any harm.
Cabbage leaves are a great idea. Put a cabbage in the fridge then when it is cold pull off some of the leaves and stuff them into your bra. You will need to change them a few times a day and you may also smell a little like a cabbage but they do work.
Yes there are tablets that you can get but there is no need to put extra chemicals in your body if you don’t need to.

I cannot thank you enough Alan. Will follow your advice and see how i go. Manythanks.

Thanks Barb, hubby and I spoke and I read up more on it and we want to get the tounge tie cut asap, read that he needs to be done before 4 months old to avoid having any anasathic. I would appreciate it if you could send me the contacts of who does it in Melbourne, we are in the Bayside area if that helps.

Many thanks.

Your MCN might be able to recomend someone. Or if you ring the midwives or lactation consultant or speech pathologist at the hospital that you birthed in they might be able to help you.
Good luck with it.
I wish I had had Imran's done early.

Good on you Lesh, you are right, it does need to be done early. We are in Brissy so I can't help you out, but I'm sure Barb will know someone, or follow Dachlostar's advice. The ABA probably could also help. GL with it, I am so glad we did, I hope you find the same thing.

Hi, Lesh 2,

Ring The Women's Hospital on 93442000 and ask them to page Anita Moorhead (Lactation Consultant) Say you spoke to Barb Glare

Warm Regards
Barb

All going ok, I am now expressing every twelve to fourteen hours so I have two expresses a day. My nipples are getting really sore again though and they feel as though they are bruised. What happens when I get down to one every twenty for hours then when i stop will my boobs still fill up? My milk looks more watered down than normal and my hubby said maybe I shouldnt be giving it to Lenny, he seems to guzzle it and it doesnt fill him hardly at all. He is drinking about 130mls of my breastmilk twice a day - he is four weeks old on Tuesday!

I took Lenny to the peadatric surgeon on Friday re his tounge tie, she felt that it was too small to cut, she said it was only about 1 mm and that she believed in time it will stetch out and that it will not cause a problem - only on my boobs!

So I am happy with the decision I have made. Just unsure about the finalising o the expressing and want to hurry it up a bit now as my nipples are really really sore and feel bruised like.

Dear Lesh2,

Your milk is perfectly fine to give to your baby. 230 mls is about 1/4 of your babies' needs - that's great. To continure weaning, cut back to one express every 24hrs and keep an eye on your breasts. After a few days of that you might cut down to once every 2nd or 3rd day, and just express a little if they feel uncomfortable.
Did Anita (Whom I referred you to) suggest that paed surgeon? I am a bit confused about her advice. For a young baby not being able to feed at the breast is a crisis situation and needs to be addressed - despite what the tongue ties looks like - it is how it feels to the mother
Regards
Barb

I stopped bfing my DD "cold turkey", so was expressing only enough to keep feeling comfortable, cutting back gradually as everyone has suggested. You've had great advice already, so the only thing I'll add is that I really found it beneficial to have hot showers - the water relieved pressure and the couple of little lumps that I had forming seemed easier to massage away under the hot water.

Sorry to hijack your post but I have to say this. Alan, you're a champion! To be able to get information and support from a professional such as yourself without the slightest hint of judgment or disapproval makes the world of difference to us mums. I wish I had been surrounded by more people like you when I made the decision to stop BFing my DD - it would have saved a world of heartache.