Birth of JJ

It has taken me ages to get around to this. Sorry. I always love reading the birth stories so I knew that I had to do it for the other ladies.

On Thursday, 13th of September I was 39weeks and 6 days. I was just doing stuff around the house and got a magazine and a biscuit and decided to lie on the bed to read my magazine. My hands were full and so I flopped down on the bed on my stomach. I had forgotten that I was pregnant for a minute there. I was in a quite bit of pain after that and continued to be uncomfortable for the rest of the day. I think that this was the beginning of my labour. Poor little chap.

On Friday night I went to bed feeling fairly normal but at 3am contractions started. They started about 20 minutes apart and were easy to cope with. I managed to sleep through them and decided not to alert my husband straight away. At 6 I got sick of just lying there waiting for the contractions to happen so I got up and got something to eat, knowing that I probably wouldn?t feel like eating later in the day. I got DH up at 7 when things were getting a bit ouchy. My DD does swimming on Saturdays and I had wanted to hold on so that she could still go but it just wasn?t going to happen, the baby was coming so I contacted my parents to come and get her. She didn?t really understand what was happening and was just pleased to be going to visit Grandma and Pup.
DH and I got ourselves showered and dressed in between contractions. It got to about 11 and I started to think that I had had enough so thought that it must be time to go to the hospital. We rang our doula and she was going to meet us there.

When we rang up the hospital we were asked whether we wanted a water birth and when I said that I did they were a bit worried because someone else wanted to use the bath as well.

We got to the hospital at about 12 and got settled into the room. I remember walking up to the hospital and DH telling me that people kept on smiling at me. That last walk is always the hardest thing - trying to walk through the pain.

When I organised the doula I was told about a photographer. I wasn?t sure. Who wants photos of herself in pain and naked as well? Then I thought, I will never do this again and the birth of a child is a miracle and I could hide the photos if I didn?t like them. So I had a photographer there as well. She was lovely and didn?t impose at all. It was a wonderful thing to do.

Having a doula was also fantastic. To have someone there for me who wasn?t emotionally involved was great. She offered me advice on positions and to keep drinking. She could talk to the midwives whilst I was recovering from a contraction was good. I am sure that a lot of medical interventions happen because women are too tired to fight. She also helped DH to be more involved, she told him how he could help me.

Back to the story. I am at the hospital having contractions. This part is a little blurry to me. I started on the ball, just rocking through contractions but that didn?t cut it for long. So I leant on the bed and on the side of the bed. At this stage, people kept on saying that I was very calm. I really didn?t feel calm. I felt completely at the mercy of the pain. Maybe I didn?t scream much but I definitely moaned a lot. All through this we were checking how the other lady was going in the bath. Unfortunately she was at about the same stage as me. She was in the bath when things were getting too hard for me. I think that that was the stage when I started thinking longingly of a caesarean. I didn?t even want an epidural, I wanted to jump straight to having them cut the thing out of me. I don?t think that I was very rational. The feeling of the baby coming through the pelvis was excrutiating. I wonder if that was because I had problems with my pelvis throughout the pregnancy. Eventually the bath was emptied and run for me. I was rushed into it at about 3pm. They put on music for me which just annoyed me but being in that primal zone I couldn?t voice my objection. I liked the water but never got completely comfortable. I was on my knees leaning on the edge of the bath and felt that I was going to fall in. DH didn?t want to get in with me because the water would get too mucky ? lol. I did hold onto his hands so tightly that his fingers went purple. At least he didn?t complain about that. In between one contraction I decided to try lying on my back which was great but I panicked once the next contraction started. I wanted to get off my back quickly then. Soon after I got into the bath I was pushing. It took everyone by surprise. He was born at 15:29. I pushed the head out in a massive contraction. I will never forget the feeling of that little head in between the contractions. It was so hard and it hurt so much. The next contraction he was out! He came out with his membranes intact. It was amazing to see him shrouded. They picked him out of the water and he was mine. I was shocked by how clean (and purple) he was. He was perfect. I wanted to have a physiological third stage and so I was sitting on a birth stool as they waited for the placenta. I was urged to push which I did but it wasn?t ready to come. I was a little distracted looking at my precious boy. They let the water out of the bath and it the membranes that had been around JJ went down the plug hole but they were still joined to me. I had to break them with my fingers as I felt like I would go down the hole with them. That was weird. The good thing about keeping him on the cord was that I had him all to myself and no-one could take him away from me.

I was moved to a bed and I lay down. I wanted him to crawl to my breast but he never managed but he moved in the right direction. I eventually felt sorry for him and put him on my breast which he hasn?t wanted to leave since. Whilst I was dealing with all this the midwives were stressing about my placenta not coming out. They checked the cord every few minutes to see if it was empty and every so often they would look under my blanket. I could have told them that it wasn?t there yet. Eventually they decided that my bladder was too full so I tried a pan and then I took my boy to the toilet with me but I couldn?t produce urine. They decided to catheterise me. That was quite painful. A lot of urine came out but still the placenta wouldn?t come. They told me that I could try for 10 more minutes and then they would have to give me the sycotocinin (or whatever the drug is). I sat on a birthing stool and knew that this was it so I pushed with all my might and it came out. Hooray! It was huge and I felt very light headed after that massive push. I think that it was more difficult than the actual birth because my body wasn?t helping, I had to think about the pushing. So after more than an hour the boy was separated from me.

I was returned to my room and we had a lovely time just looking at the boy and getting to know him. We had a proper breastfeed and Kelly found DH and I some food. A doula is great for thinking of practical things as well. I had a couple of tears which were better stitched up. The most painful (or shall we say one of the most painful) things about the birth was the injections for the anaesthetic. It stung. It seemed to take a long time to get stitched up.

We stayed at the birth centre for 24 hours and that first night JJ slept in between DH and I. It was lovely. My milk came in the next day.
DD came to visit the next morning with my mum and dad. She was so excited to see her baby and loved him instantly. There wasn?t a second of jealousy. Mum had been advised that DD would be awful when it came to go home with them. She wouldn?t want to go and would scream and cry. Mum was terrified. When it came to leave DD gave DH, JJ and me a kiss and matter of factly left. She happily closed all the cupboards on the way out. There were no tears at all.
JJ is now 4 months old and grew hugely. He is now 8 kgs which is about twice the size of DD at the same age.

Frederick John Joshua
Birth Place: Clayton Birth Centre
Date: 15 September, 2007
Time: 3:29 pm
Weight: 3360g
Length: 50cm
Head Circ.: 35cm

What a beautiful story you did an amazing job. How did your photo's turn out?

That is such a beautiful birth story!! OWCH about the cathater though! That's so amazing that JJ was born with his membranes intact, many ancient cultures believe(d) that it makes a person endowed with psychic/clairvoyant abilities. Well done :D

Hoody, the photos were lovely. I thought that I wouldn't like looking at a naked me but it is interesting seeing the pain in my face. There are things there that I wouldn't remember. I wouldn't have even seen him in the membranes if I didn't have the photos. Well worth it.

Thanks for sharing a beautiful birth story. You have a great way with words!

Thanks for sharing your beautiful birth story Maryann.
You were amazing and I'm sure JJ is growing into a dashing little man!

Forgot to mention, Raven was my photographer. She did a great job as I have mentioned above a few times.

Kelly was my doula and she was wonderful as well. Very calming when I was quietly out of control.

I couldn't recommend these two ladies high enough.