What do you think? Dodgy or not?

Hi all,

We are off to a wedding on Saturday and the baby-sitter for Olivia I had all lined up can no longer make it. :mad:

We could take her with us, but it is from 4pm till late, and she is not great at sleeping in her pushchair (it gets way to hot for big sleeps). Plus DH & I were really looking forward to some "Lucy and Andrew time" IYKWIM?

Anyways, my old boss has offered to babysit. He is around 55, single, with kids and grand-kids of his own, and is a lovely guy. I have known him for 18 months, and even though I no longer work for him, we keep in touch and we meet for coffee about once a week with Olivia, so she knows him quite well.

Anyway, he has offered to babysit (at our house) and I jumped at the offer.

I have since mentioned to another friend (who is at the wedding too, so she can't babysit for us!) and she thought it was "a bit odd". Kind of implied that it was a bit dodgy, as he is male and single?

Until she questioned it, I wasn't worried, but know she has put me in a hesitant frame of mind. Am I taking a risk? It has NEVER crossed my mind to be wary of him at all, as I find him a lovely guy, but maybe I am being too trusting? You hear such awful retrospective stories about "family friends". So should I be cautious, or am I being niave in feeling that this is totally OK? I consider myself a good judge of character and he strikes me as totally dependable, but I guess youc an never be too careful?

What do you think? Anyone any thoughts on this? Honest opinions gratefully recieved...........

I was reading your post Lucy thinking that it was lovely for your old boss to do that for you. Then I got to where your friend said it was dodgy which made me think twice, which you obviously have done.

My godfather is 55ish and was part of the Gypsy Joker bikie gang and he looks very rough. But you have never met a gentler, kinder man & I would never imagine him hurting or being inappropriate with a young baby. Having said that, what I think I am trying to say is, you know this man so I would think you have a fair idea of what he would be like around kids.

Does your friend know him, the one that said it is dodgy? If she does I would be very cautious cos she might see something that you don't. If she doesn't, she can't really judge a person that she has never met IYKWIM.

Good point Sarah! No, my friend has never met my old boss. My initial reaction to his offer was one of delight, because Olivia knows him and DH adn I both like him so much. So I guess I should go on my gut reaction. I think. I am still in two minds about it.

I'm glad at least some of my waffle made sense ;)

I would say to go with your 1st descision Lucy. You have already told the man yes so he might feel a bit funny if you suddenly back out of it. I wouldn't have a problem leaving my kids with an older male friend. He shouldn't get any sort of label just because he is male and single iykwim.

You have said you consider yourself to be a good judge of character so go with that. If you had ever personally seen something he did that was a bit dodgy then I would be saying no find someone else. I know if it was the male in this situation I would be hurt if I ever found out you had said no cause someone put some thoughts into your head. Someone that didn't know me personally.

Love :smt049

I can only second what the others have said Lucy. I can see why you leapt at the opportunity, considering you know the man and believe yourself to be a good judge of character, but I can also understand why you hesitated when your friend made that comment - I'm pretty certain that I too would hesitate as it doesn't take much to make you second guess yourself! However, it sounds like the comment may have been unwarranted, as she doesn't know him and it's not very nice to assume he's dodgey just because he's single and 55 - I'd be pretty hurt if I was him and found out that something like that had been implied about me! I guess what I'm saying is to go with your gut instincts?!