Feeling down about it all :(

It took us 3 years to concieve DS so i know it takes time and i thought i would be able to handle ttc a lot better than the first time beings i know how long it might take, but its been 6 months already and its really not any easier. I wonder wether it may be like before and i have to suffer 4 m/c before it happens again, and i only think that as we have already had 1 m/c while TTC #2 and i really dont think i could handle that all over again, we have 6 precious angels and i love them so much, but i dont want anymore:cry: The last three years were the toughest of my life and once DS was born it was like i had been holding my breathe for years and the minute i held my baby boy in my arms it was like i let it go, i was so full of love for my little bundle and so happy, and i soooo want that again. Now i feel like its about to start all over again. I keep getting told to be greatful for the bub i have, and i am, i really am greatful, for all my babies DS and my angels, so i hope this doesn't come across sounding selfish.


Wishing luck to everyone who is TTC wether it be 1 month or 20yrs, i hope you all have BFP's and little bubba's in your arms soon.

Thankyou for listening.

Not much to say but huge hugs..I hope your journey tttc #2 is smoother.

awww sweetie, i know wat u mean... its so heartbreaking each cycle when you don't get that :bfp: and you get so worked up for one. I truly hope that you do get a :bfp: very soon! :hug:

hun, don't feel bad for feeling the way you do IYKWIM. those 3 years of trying were full of grief and heartache, hopes and dreams being dashed. you were effected by it and that was real. now you want to try again you are reminded of all those feelings and want to protect yourself from them again. have you ever had any counselling on ways to cope with your emotions? it may help you approach this time TTC a bit better. i have done it and found many ways to look at the journey and my response to it.
perhaps those who tell you to be grateful for what you have are trying to help protect you from those feelings again? i hope so as you should never feel grateful for what you have or guilty about trying. from reading other women's accounts, secondary infertility (not saying you will experience this but in some ways you are already experiencing grief before starting TTC) can be as real or more painful as the first time around.

i really resonated with your "I had been holding my breathe for years...". thanks for sharing and i wish you all the best for your #2!

xx

tears of Joy - I know how you feel hun :hug: you have your good days and you have your bad days.... :bluedust:

Today was a bad day for me, hoping tomorrow is a better day...