Help, 13mth old still waking 3-6 times a night!

Ok, This is probably going to be long so please bare (sp) with me. I posted a few weeks ago about my DD not sleeping well. It is still ongoing and I am getting really stressed, not to mention tired! I am trying to take it one day at a time, but when day, after day she's waking more and more I just don't know what to do with her. Last night we were up 4 times. Night before 6, before that I think it was 5times. Sometimes it's just to have her dummy put back in, even though she has 4 or so in her cot in the hopes she'll find one herself. The other night I went in to give her dummy and she had one in her hand, but was still crying! Sometimes she wake really crying, real tears and big sobs. Other times it's just whinging and I try to pat her off in the cot but she will not go to sleep again until I pick her up and cuddle her. I cuddle her to sleep, though no rocking singing or patting just hold her.
I won't do control crying/comforting. I can't handle her crying and think there must be a reason for her to wake, even if just for a cuddle. But I also don't want to bring her back into our bed. I want her to get used to ebing in her own cot and room. Once our new bub comes along, she won't fit in our bed, so I want her to get used to it now. I never co slept with her all night, and it was only ever about 3 times a week or so that she came to our bed, and in the early hours of the morning so not all night, less towards the end. We moved her from our room to her own room about 8 wks ago. She has been teething but the teeth seem to all be through the gums now. She eats well, and has 4 milk (cows milk) bottles over the day- early morning before breaky, late arvo after her arvo sleep, night time before bed and one in the night. Uslly about 150-180mls. SO all up, about 600mls of milk a day, is that too much?? She still eats breaky lunch and dinner, has about 300+mls of water and nibbles in the day, she's not fat either.
She sleeps twice in the day time, at about 10ish and then at about 1.30ish. Frist for about 40mins then about 1-1 1/2hrs. She usually goes to bed at 7, not later than 8 and wakes at between 6-7. I don't know how to teach her to sleep in the night. What's going on in her little mind? Are there any books which may help?
If you have gotten this far, thanks! Any advice would be appreciated.

I know where you are coming from! Riley woke every 2 hours for a BF at 12 months, in desperation I ended up going to Tresillian (I was working and the tiredness was killing me)
Is she cold? I have found that Riley has been waking up at 2 or 3 am this past week and I think he is just cold.
I really don't have any other useful suggestions for you other than I know how you feel!

We had a similar sort of problem with waking constantly, up to 10 times a night until Zander was around two years old. We found a combination of Braur's Calm (only ever one dose before bed for us) and Healing Hippo Sleep Spray was really really helpful. The Brauer's is basically like Camomile tea & is meant to relax them & the sleep spray is aromatherapy oils designed to promote relaxation. Either on it's own wasn't great, but the two together made a huge difference. When we used the spray we'd make sure his pillow was sprayed each night so the lovely oils would help him drift back off if he did wake.

Good luck hun, sleep deprivation can be a killer.

Tahnkyou for your suggestions and sympathy! Sounds likeit's kind of common for bubs to begin to wake at 12mths again. She never actually slept the night through continually though she has done it several times. She was waking once a nigth for months, which I could handle quite easily. It's just the repetitive waking that's getting to me. DH helps when he can if he's not working, but he works 12+hr shifts so he needs his rest too.
Last night I ended up giving her 2 bottles because despite my best efforts she just wouldn't go back to bed twice. After her bottle she went to sleep no problems. If we weren't having another bub I wouldn't mind co sleeping, but I don't want to kick her out when bub comes along and her resent him for it.
I have thought that maybe she's cold, but I put a singlet, thin sleep suit after her bath, and then flanellette/thick jarmies (on top), two pairs of socks or soft slippers on her when she goes to bed, as well as her comfort blankie (small minkie blanket) and a cotton waffle blanket when I go to bed. She's often sweaty when I put her to bed and I check her several times before I go to bed. Though she's not hot when she wakes. She's often out of her blankets when I go in in the middle of the night though, but I don't know how to keep her blanket on and she won't sleep in a sleeping bag.
I have thought of contacting tresillian or karitane, but I think they do control comforting and that's not the way I wan't to go, I couldn't continue it when I get home on my own. I would end up in tears with her, and would feel way too guilty for not comforting her when she's sad, even if she's manipulating me!
And yep, the sleep deprivation is really getting to me...

I know that a lot of people will be opposed to this idea but a dr recommended this to me with my first DS and it made the world of difference. We use a 4 fin oil heater in their rooms.It's the smallest one you can get and we put it on before we go to bed. It stays on all night and just takes the chill off the air. I can honestly say it does work for us. I didnt turn it on a few nights ago and we had a shocking night with waking. DS also won't sleep in a sleeping bag and won't keep the covers on. We usually don't turn it on though until about 10pm or 10.30pm and usually only set the thermostat to half way. If you feel comfortable doing this I would give it a try because it is starting to get cool in the night.