20 Month Old - Sleep Issues

Hi everyone,

My 20 month old has never been a good sleeper. She used to cat nap when she was a baby and around the 12 month mark started sleeping for longer periods during the day.

We have always rocked her to sleep and we will continue.

The last few weeks though has seen her wake up in the night (say before 1am) and I go into her room and tell her I'll sit down and hold her hand through the cot etc. By this stage though she is already standing up with her wrap ready for me to pick her up. We then sit on the rocking chair and she falls asleep almost immediately. Unless she asks for a drink of water which she's also been doing lately. I then get up and put her in her cot. Less than an hour later and she's crying/calling out for me again. We try the same thing, this time lying together on her floor (no it's not comfortable!) but she falls asleep. As soon as I move a hair on my head she's awake and clinging to my tightly.

I then give up cause I'm so tired already and bring her back into bed with my husband and I.

I'm thinking this may be a phase, but has anyone got any ideas? She's been teething for a while and has been a bit clingy lately to me. Not sure if it's because she's at that age or if its because I've been working a bit more lately and she's getting babysat. I work from home though so she's there in the house with the babysitter.

Thanks in advance. We don't want to let her cry herself to sleep.

Hi, I don't have much advice to give but I just wanted to tell you to hang in there. Usually these things pass.

The main thing is, if both you and your husband are comfortable with it, then just let her finish the night in your bed. I know a lot of people will say it's a bad habbit and you shouldn't do it but basically the only people that matter are you, your husband and your daughter. Personally i love the way DD curls into me to go to sleep, unfortunately she is a very restless sleeper and moves around so much that when she is on our bed either DH or I, or sometimes both of us!, end up having to leave as she takes up so much room. So now she only comes into bed after 5am after DH has gotten up, or on a saturday morning as DH likes to have a family cuddle before getting up.

The other thing, if you want her to spend more time in her own bed, is to try sending your husband in to resettle her at night. She probably won't like it and will take longer to go back to sleep but eventually she'll decide that sleeping is better than getting boring daddy and will sleep for longer before waking up. That is how we got our daughter to sleep better at night.:) If I haven't explained myself properly let me know but we got this technique from the Elizabeth Pantley book which might be worthwhile for you to check out.

Anyway, good luck and remember that in the long term you are doing the right thing by comforting her even if it means a little sacrifice in the short term.

Could she be getting cold? My 3yo started waking every night as soon as the weather turned. See if dressing her more warmly or keeping her room warmer at night helps. This is most likely a temporary phase, I have been through it a few times with the older one. But if nothing else you try works, maybe try moving her into a bed and see whether that makes a difference. GL.

I had the same problems with DS around 18 months....we decided to move him into a big bed. Although we still had to lay with him to assist with settling, it was much more comfortable and eventually no problems with night time waking. Perhaps she is suffering a bit of separation anxiety...put a t-shirt or something that you have worn during the day into bed with her, so she can smell her mummy while she sleeps.

Good luck!!