Peter's Birth- So worth it all!! (long)
Peter was overdue, by at least a week, depending on who?s due date you go by. Waiting for labour to start was remarkably difficult. I feared that I would need to be induced, and that scared me because I wanted to experience labour naturally.
In any case, the weekend before Peter was born was a long weekend. We were due to go in to see the midwife about scheduling an induction on the Tuesday. Sunday afternoon we DTD and had a nice dinner, I even had some red wine and I felt really relaxed. On Sunday night when I went to bed, I started to experience some period like pains. They were uncomfortable enough to wake me up and demand my attention, but they were not horrible. They came every ten minutes or so for a few hours and then kind of petered off and I fell asleep. But by the morning, it had largely subsided. I did, however, get very excited when I went to the toilet and saw that my knickers had lots of red spots in them, but it was like watery red, not the mucus I was looking for. I called the hospital and they said it was probably a small bloody show and it sounded normal. That morning I also had some diahrreah, another sign of impending labour which excited me. However, the day wore on and nothing more happened. Later in the day I realised with some embarassment that the blood in my knickers could have been from our DTD and had nothing to do with labour. I was very disappointed and had a small teary to Scott on Monday evening.
Monday night I went to bed, not looking forward to our midwife appointment the next day. Shortly after turning out the light, about 10pm, I started having the same period type pains as the night previously. Given they had not gone anywhere before, I figured it would be largely the same story, and so I rode them out for an hour or so. They were maybe 15 minutes apart. By around 11, I noticed they kept getting stronger and more towards 10 minutes apart, although the times fluctuated. I let Scott know and he seemed a little nonplussed after the last night. At some point I asked for the TENS machine. I didn?t want to put it on too early, and I thought that these kind of contractions would probably go on all night, but I didn?t want to leave it too late either. Scott said ?but won?t you be going to sleep??. I said I was not going to be sleeping through these contractions, so he put the TENS on me, and encouraged me to rest. We both thought it was going to be a long night and that nothing would really happen for quite some time. At this stage it was about 11:30 and Scott went to sleep on the couch. I was all set up in bed- I had my laptop on to contractionmaster to time the contractions, I had my TENS machine all hooked up and I had a book and a torch. In between contractions, which were still anywhere between 8-13 minutes apart, I would try to rest or read. The contractions were strong enough that each time I needed to roll onto my hands and knees and rock and breathe through them. They were like very intense period pains, coming to a peak and then falling away. I felt pretty normal between them.
The pains kept getting stronger and at some point, I remember feeling leaking between my legs. I had a pad on so I didn?t concern me. I looked and saw I was leaking blood and when I took a tissue and wiped, I saw it was the classic ?blood streaked snot? of the mucus plug. I took this as an encouraging sign that I was genuinely in labour and starting to dilate. At 12:49, I was in the middle of a contraction when I felt a kind of muted pop, like a little internal fart, and then I felt liquid trickling out of me. I was pretty sure my water had broken, and I didn?t want to get water all over the bed, so I kind of shuffled off the side on my hands and knees, still in the middle of the contraction. After the contraction, I saw that my pad was quite wet with a watery, blood tinged fluid. At this point, I was hooked up to TENS, trying to time my contractions, hanging off the side of the bed and trying to work out what to do about the fluid leaking from me- it can?t have been pretty!! I eventually managed to sit myself on a bucket I had beside the bed and during the next contraction, I tried to rock over it and not drip all over the place. At this point, I decided I better do something more, but I kept getting interrupted by contractions, which were now coming every 3-5 minutes. Between one set, I managed to get up and let Scott know that my waters had broken and then I called the hospital. I said I wanted to stay home as long as I could- I still didn?t think I was very far along in labour for some reason, and thought I would probably be hanging around hospital and stalling my labour forever if I went in then. But they said given my water had broken they wanted to see me, and I could go home afterwards if I wanted. So off to hospital we went. I called my doula while Scott was putting stuff in the car, and asked if she wanted to go back to sleep until I knew what the hospital said. She said that with my waters broken and contractions now every 2-3 minutes apart, I was not going to go home again and she was on her way. I was surprised by what she said and finally thought I might genuinely be in real labour- I am not sure why this was so surprising to me!
The ride to the hospital was mercifully short. Scott dropped me off at emergency and went to put the car in a park. There were people around, but I had a contraction and didn?t care about the noise I was making, which by this stage was a low moan all through the contraction. We spent the first while on the bed with me having contractions and using TENS and my doula rubbing my back. I went onto the birth ball at some point which was helpful. Eventually, the midwife checked my dilation- she had prepared me to not really be dilated at all, and we were all surprised and pleased when she said I was at 3-4cm- yay!
At this point I went into the shower, which was lovely. It provided at least as much releif as the TENS and was really nice in between contractions. I was surprised by how normal I felt in between contractions at this stage. For what seems a long while, I laboured in the shower on the birth ball. Each contraction I would grip the bar or Christine?s hand and I would moan, increasingly loudly. I don?t know how long this went on for, things were getting a bit hazy. At some point, I decided I wanted to try the gas as the peak of the contractions was very nasty indeed. Once I got used to using the gas, it was really quite good at taking some of the edge off the contractions, although only while I was breathing in. It also impeded the noise I could make on my out breath. I stayed in the shower with the gas for probably quite some time, although again I have no idea how long. Eventually, with the contractions growing stronger and stronger I told Christine I wanted something more and to see how long it would take to arrange an epidural. They started to get this organised.
They did an internal and saw that I was about 6cm dilated, which was great.
The epi arrived much quicker than expected and they started getting me all prepared. By now contractions were probably 1-2 minutes apart and the only thing getting me through them was the thought that each one could be the last before the epi kicked in. At some point in here I threw up.
After several contractions and lots of fiddling around, they finally got the epi in. I hardly felt it in the context of everything else. I wasn?t sure how it was going to work, but I did notice after a while that I was sucking less and less on the gas each contraction. The doctor who put it in was brilliant and hung around to make sure it was all working correctly. It was sweet releif after that! The epi was in and finally working at about 5:45am.
I tried to kind of rest at this point, but I felt very shakey and pretty doped up. But I was not in pain, and that was wonderful. For the next several hours, I kind of floated along in a state of suspended animation. There was lots of checking of Bean?s heartrate (at some point they had put a monitor on his head), and his heartrate showed lots of ups and downs. They kept rolling me from side to side. Various doctors came in throughout and took a look, and they always said ?wait a little longer?.
At about 8:30am, they did an internal and saw that I was still only 6cm. The epi had slowed down my contractions somewhat and I was not progressing. This didn?t concern them as much as bean?s erratic heartrate did. Eventually, they decided to give me a small dose of syntocinon and get things moving- they were hesitant about it because of how it might affect bean?s heartrate, but they decided they needed to make a decision about which way to go- speed up labour, or declare it as non-progressive with a distressed baby and do a c-section. At 9am they gave me the synt, and I felt a contraction even through my epi that was considerable. Suddenly the midwives were looking with concern at the monitors and then the room erupted into chaos. Apparently bean?s heartrate dropped from 130 to 55 very suddenly. They made me roll over very quickly which scared me and the room was suddenly full of 10 or 12 people all rushing around madly. They said they needed to do an emergency c-section as they had to get my baby out, he was not coping. I was scared, but Christine was super reassuring. They were getting me all prepped when the doctor did an internal and then said ?get her in a good labour position. She?s fully dilated and the head is right there. Get me the vacuum?. I was very releived to hear this. So very quickly I was in stirrups and then all I know is there was lot of tugging and pressure and the doctor concentrating between my legs. Then everyone was telling me to push. I was so happy I got to help push my baby out! I felt like I was involved in the labour again. I pushed for three contractions worth. The doctor kept loosing suction on the baby?s head, and at one point the cup came off and sprayed blood across half the room! Then, at 9:33am, Peter was born. I was holding Scott?s hand when our baby came out and it was miraculous- finally we got to meet our bean! The next minutes are a blur, but I remember crying with Scott and hearing bean cry and him coming onto my chest and being able to touch him and kiss him and it was incredible. Eventually they weighed and wrapped him and he was huge- 4.2kg! Everyone was shocked at how big he was.
It took them about an hour or so to stitch me up. All I felt was pressure, no pain- thank God for the epidural. It would have been horrendous to experience that birth and stitch up without the epi. The time passed pretty quick, with all of us just cuddling Peter and exclaiming over him. He spent most of that time on my chest. I just couldn?t beleive that little person had been inside of me! I was in awe when he opened his eyes and looked at me. My little man!!!
Eventually they finished stitching me and they got my room ready and Christine left. We eventually send Scott home, as he was exhausted and overwhelmed. They tried to get me up, but because of the blood loss and everything, I couldn?t stand and so they kept me in the L & D room for several hours until finally I could stand up and have a quick shower (which was heaven) and head off to my room.
Over the next few days, I spent some wonderful time with Peter in the hospital, relaxing together and getting used to one another. The most difficult thing, however, was my recovery. My stitches hurt terribly and I was constantly asking for pain releif and ice packs. It was extremely difficult to walk anywhere. I was also weak, short of breath and pale from losing so much blood during delivery. Eventually they decided that I needed a blood transfusion as my Hb was at 73- very low given normal range starts at 115. I was scared about the transfusion and didn?t like the thought of having someone else?s blood in me, and I could hardly bring myself to watch as it dripped into me for 6 hours. But it did make me feel better.
As a result, I was in hospital for 3 nights. I gave birth to Peter on Tuesday morning, and came home on Friday at about 6pm. The first night was awful - Peter screamed for half the night (something he hasn?t done since) and we had no idea what to do!
We got through the weekend and in the next week, had several visits by the hospital midwives. They were concerned about my stiches and it turns out that several of my stitches has come apart and there was a wound which became infected. I was so very, very sore. It was impossible to walk anywhere or sit or basically do anything! It was in constant pain. Finally now, 2.5 weeks after birth, I feel like it is starting to heal. It still hurts to walk any distance, I cannot drive the manual car as its too sore and I have to sit carefully. But it is getting better.
The other complication I had was that my bleeding grew lighter, and then heavier again and I started having twingy pains in my abdomen. Then, 2 weeks post birth, I had a big bleed where I soaked a pad in an hour. Scott and I rushed off to emergency where they were sure they would have to give me a general for a D & C to clean out any retained placenta. But they did an ultrasound and saw that it was quite low down by my cervix and that I would pass it on my own, which eventually it did (very gross).
With all of this, I have been officially labelled as having a ?traumatic birth?. On top of my traumatic pregnancy, I am hardly in a rush to have any more!! But thats ok because my Peter is absolutely perfect! They say it will take some 2-3 months to fully recover and that I may think I am recovered after 6 weeks, but I won?t be. I need to take it as easy as I can and drink lots and let myself heal. Easier said than done with a newborn and a business to run and all that, but one way or another, it will happen.
Peter is a perfect child, he rarely cries and he loves to sleep. He is often fussy at night, but we are trying to teach him the difference between day and night so his champion sleeping abilities are transferred to night rather than day. Both Scott and I are overwhemled with love for him and have bonded perfectly. We just marvel at his little face and all the expressions he makes, and are amazed at the little new things he does everyday. He stares around at the world with his big dark eyes just taking everything in with such innocence and contentment. It is beautiful!!
