Newborn sleep issues

Our 2 1/2 week old baby girl has gone from being a total sleepy-head to being a nightmare to get to sleep. It happened overnight - one day she was having 3 x 2hr sleeps during the day, the next day she screamed all day and has now been doing that for 4 days. We used to be able to just put her down anywhere and whe would sleep, now she has to be held and even that is not enough. She will not settle for anything in my arms, she just gets more and more desperate for the boob.

She's still ok at night (2x 4hr sleeps), although the first attempt to get her to sleep is getting harder and harder. Last night she had 8 boobs in 2 hrs and still wouldn't sleep.

Because she was such a sleepy-head she was always falling asleep on the boob and I think she wants that for every sleep now. Thing is, my partner goes back to work in a week and I can't leave our 2 yo to entertain himself while I try to get Jade to sleep.

Any suggestions? We are pretty desperate - her brother was a total nightmare sleepwise, and he still wakes up 2-3x on a good night. We just can't cope with another 2 years of hell.

I thought maybe we could get someone to come to our house to advise us - does anyone know where we might be able to find someone who uses gentle techniques? I feel like we must be doing something wrong if both of our babies are so bad. She started off like a text-book baby and somehow I've ruined her already.

Sorry for the long post. Any suggestions welcome.

Please don't think that you have "ruined" her. My brother always said that babies wake up after about two weeks, and thats the time you know they are in the house!! (although I think mine "Woke up" at around day 3..lol)

Have you got a sling or something to put her in during the day to help settle? Or maybe a hammock or something to bounce her to sleep? I put DS to sleep mostly on the couch when he was a young bubba, and just sat next to him patting his back (he was a tummy sleeper) until he went to sleep, and then I could be there quickly if he stirred to pat him back to sleep.... I was pretty desperate to try anything, and that was before I found out about slings or hammocks!!!!

Sorry not too much help, but hang in there, you are doing a GREAT job. :hug:

There is a place here in Perth called Ngala who you can talk to about sleep and settling techniques. They are really helpful. My friend gave me their book called "Secrets of Good Sleepers" for my baby shower and it is my bible. Even when I can't get anything to work at times, it helps just to read the tips. I am sure you could give Ngala a ring (they have a website) for some advice...

Oh i went through the same thing. I remember that night like it was yesterday.
She is 13w now, and its still rare for her to have a sleep for more than 20 mins. I have learnt that she will only be happy to be put to sleep after 9:30 pm, to which ill change nappy, wrap, feed, and into her cot. She will usually drift off to sleep.
Im sorry, i cant really help you as im still trying to figure it all out myself. Im considering a hammock though, if we do go down that path ill let you know how it goes.
Oh and please dont think you 'ruined' her coz you soo havent. Ive heard babies need to be helped to be put to sleep (rocking, patting, singing, gently bouncing, what ever works), because they dont know how to by themselves.
Give Ngala a call, hopefully you will find them helpful. :) all the best. And if you find the miriacle trick, please let me know, coz im dying to know ;)

Hi Tracey

Your little one sounds very normal to me. My babies "woke up" and started exercising their lungs and their eyes a bit more at around the 2 week mark :)

Have you checked out the handy gentle-settling techniques and other sleepy tips in the articles section? Here you go.

Hi,

Your little one is acting like a really, really normal baby. This stage won't last very long.
Many babies spend a week or two "sleeping off the birth". This fits in with what our society considers to be normal - so visitors peek into the crib and coo "oh, what a good baby" And by about 2 and a half weeks we are just quietly congratulating ourselves that it's because we are "good parents" Then they wake up - and we go into a spin. But, a good baby is a baby who demands, loudly and often, to be fed. So on those grounds, you have one of the best.
Two weeks ago she was in your tummy, rocked by your movement, fed continually, hearing your voice, your breathing and your heart. All that has changed. The closest she can get to what she has known for her entire existance is being in your arms, at your breast, next to your heart. Gradually, she will adjust. Remember the arsenic hour? (OK, hours) it's that period of time in the evening - a few hours, when they, yes, need 8 boobs to get to sleep. Now we call it cluster feeding - nothing to do with you, by the way, it's them. It's their scratchy, irritable time of the day.
I wonder if she has been weighed yet? Back to her birthweight? Feeding 8-12 times in 24hrs? Lots of wet and pooey nappies? Then, she's doing fine. As others have said, with a toddler around as well, a sling can be a lifesaver. Don't be afraid to pop her in bed with you if your are really exhausted (as long as you are not drugged or drunk) The first 6 weeks or so are tough going, but she'll settle, and you'll get through it
Regards
Barb

:hug: I think Barb's advice is excellent. I just wanted to pop in and tell you that your babies are not bad...........they are normal children, behaving exactly as they should. And you have done nothing wrong, you haven't 'ruined' her at all. Try the sling, it will likely save your sanity with a toddler around as well :) Good luck.

Thank you ladies for your replies. One of the great things about this website is that it makes me feel like we are normal!

I am torn between wanting to give Jade what she wants - booby and sleeping in my arms - and knowing that Kai needs me too. I already feel like I'm failing both of them!

Do you think there is any point in trying (gently, using Pantley's Pull off!!) to break the nipple association for sleeping? Would it be better to wait till she's passed the 6 week mark? Or will it be even more entrenched by then?

As I said Kai was a shocker - at this age it would take me 45 mins to get him to sleep and then he would only sleep for 15 mins. We're scarred by that! I was so pleased that Jade was such a great sleeper - I didn't know that lots of newbies do that!

Thanks again!

I think it is a bit too early to try getting her off the nipple, save that one for later. My DD changes from week to week and sleep to sleep on what she needs to get her to sleep. Really have a look at wearing bub during the day or even when you are out and about. I find they often sleep better when out than at home when I really want them to sleep. Another thing to try is a rocker or bouncer. This time around I have a rocker with a vibrate function, it is really helpful. Often I can boob her to sleep and carefully transfer her. The vibrate seems to help keep her to sleep, if not then being able to rock it can help. I have even had times where she has gone to sleep just sitting in it whilst she watches me in the kitchen. You could also introduce music to see if that helps, a feed to some soothing music can sometimes do the trick to keep them asleep a bit longer.

Another thing to try of an evening is to get both kids to sleep together. DD1 has a long sleep ritual of lots of reading. I found it a lay down with both of them on our bed, had bub on the boob and just read, both of them would drift of to sleep quite nicely. Just a note it does not seem to work though if bubs is quite upset and needs to be held up right at that time, but it is worth trying a few times. Maybe even try it for nap time.