Im soooo tired...Dont know what to do anymore!

My 11 month old DS has NEVER been a good sleeper. He has "slept through" (ie. 11pm-4am) the night maybe about 8 times in 11 months.

I've tried everything... We have a night time routine which i started when he was about 4 months old. I've tried adjusting the amount of food during the day, i tried going back to an 11pm feed. I've tried evrything i've read or been advised to do, while still trying to keep it somewhat the same.

Lately, his new thing because he now sits up in the cot when he wakes up, is to call out until i go back in and lay him back down! He KNOWS how to lay back down himself!

I dont know what to do anymore! Im so tired after 11 months (well, 18 months if you count being pg) of broken sleep. I know im not the only one, but im starting to go crazy from lack of sleep. And i HATE feeling like this everyday.

What do i do? Do i let him go for a bit and let him work out how to lay himself back down? And its not even crying, its just noises to get someones attention. The minute it turns into crying, im straight in there. I just feel that nothing is going to change if i keep going into him EVERY time he wakes up. He wakes up pretty much every hour and a half now and at night, i feel like there is just no point in me even trying to go to bed and go to sleep!

Im sorry for the whinge and i know im not the only one suffering from lack of sleep! It just seems to make everything worse though doesn't it?

What do you ladies suggest? I'll try anything!

just thought I would give you a :hug: and say hang in there I know there are a lot of people who dont like CC but I feel sometimes it the only way....

soory TT I hav eto go pick up may but I will be back soon

Oh Hun, first of all big cuddles :hug: lack of sleep will send you loopy. There have been times I thought I could sleep a week and I have felt total and utter exhaustion, almost dispair.

My DS isn't a good sleeper and is still waking a few times a night. Teething is even worse and there have been times I've slept on the floor in the nursery because it was pointless going back to bed.

From what you describe your DS is waking every 2 sleep cycles. He needs help to learn how to re-settle. I don't do CC so what I'm going to suggest takes some time.

What I would do is pre-empt his wake up. Go in there at about the 1 hour make and wait. Watch him, as he is stiring, pat his bum, stoke his hair, sing to him whatever it is that you do to help him resettle. But don't take him out of the cot. Hopefully with this little bit of assistance he will realise that he can fall back to sleep. Gradually reduce the amount of assistance you give him. Until eventually he won't need mumma's help at all. I did this, and it took about a week of no sleep and a lot of tears from me but it worked. I noticed a change in DS almost after the first night and now he sleeps fom about 7 hours before waking and only needs a little bit of help to go back to sleep. I should say that if at any stage he would cry I'd pick him up and start from the begining.

We still have our bad nights but the are much less frequent.

The other thing you could do is co-sleep. I did this for a while (and still do) because I just needed to sleep. I found DS would cuddle up and settle in and I could easily settle him in bed with me and still be half asleep myself.

HTH

I hope you get some sleep soon as I know how hard it is.

Lv Spring

Thank you tali and spring

I've never done the re-settle thing. He's always gone straight to sleep when i put him to bed, day or night. Would it still work if i started now?

He hates being on his tummy and since being mobile while in bed, this is how he always wakes up. I've gone in at the first sign of stirring and find him on his tummy trying to get up and this is why he's always sitting up and cant get back down.

I've tried co-sleeping as i did this in the early months when he had reflux. But i dont sleep properly with him as i have a bad neck and with him in my arm, i can barely move the next morning. I've done this though when i was desprate for sleep and just paid for it the next morning. Im not game to let him sleep out of my srms as im scared he'll wake up and crawl off the end of the bed!

I think it is worth a try to re-settle him. Oliver was the same, as soon as he learnt to sit up in his cot I'd go in there and he would be wide awake waving at me. (I would get so frustrated) how could this kid be wide awake and want to play at 2am!!!

I would just go in, lay him back down, say a sleep association word like 'nighty night' and walk out. I would only say 'nighty night' the first few times and then after that I wouldn't say anything. No word of a lie I've done this about 25 times in a row but eventually he would stop sitting up. If he started to get upset I'd pick him up, give him a cuddle and wait until he calmed down before trying again.

I did the same thing when he learnt to stand up in the cot.

Give it a go hun, I really hope it works

give sleep settling ago like SA said as it might work he does sound like he is waking himself up when he rolls onto his tummy.... Have you tried some rolled up towels on either side for him to stop this ? Dont know if it will work on older bubs but I had to have DS sleep this way when he was a new born due to the refax, so might work....


Best of luck tonight and the next week I think the main thing is to sick to it as the minute you give in you are back to square one....

Dont forget it is very cold at night right now so he could also be cold... I know DD2 sence we have moved here has been waking up each night too as she is so used to sleeping without covers that she now kicks them all of so is waking herself up as she is cold but I am lazy and just bring her into the bed where we both get a good night sleep...I am hoping in summer she will return to been a good sleeper....

Lets me know how you go if you need anymore help let me know...
you could always drop him around here for a while so can catch up on some shut eye :hug:

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What do i do? Do i let him go for a bit and let him work out how to lay himself back down? And its not even crying, its just noises to get someones attention. The minute it turns into crying, im straight in there. I just feel that nothing is going to change if i keep going into him EVERY time he wakes up. He wakes up pretty much every hour and a half now and at night, i feel like there is just no point in me even trying to go to bed and go to sleep!

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Are you comfortable with this? Could be worth a go, particularly if he's not distressed. I know my DD wakes through the night - I think its pretty common for them to wake between some cycles - but I tend to only go in there and pick her up if I can hear that she's upset, KWIM? Sometimes I hear her talking, or making noises, but she goes back to sleep when she's ready.
Don't know if this is helpful, but just wanted to reassure you - follow your instincts. It sounds like from what you've said above, you might have something to work with?

Thanks tali, your so sweet! Have you tried a sleeping bag for DD2? I find it helps keep Toby warm at night when he comes out of the covers (was also hoping it might help limit his movements at night, but no!)

Snacks- i think maybe your right. Maybe i was looking for "permission" that its ok to leave him to sort it out for himself. Every morning i say "tonight, im leaving him, im not getting up every hour and a half" then i always end up doing it anyway!

She has worked out zips and buttons so just takes them off she sleeps in those all in one " telly tubby " suits from Target... but still she is too cold... Now I am just waiting for the warmth to come back....

It is OK to use CC I did it with DD2 and work wonderfully the only reason I am not doing so well with Kai is that she shares her room with May and dont want her to wake up May if I let her cry to long, that and I am a big wimp ATM and are to cold to hang around so just bring her to the bed with me lol

Best of luck tonight.... just remeber stand strong and stick to your guns....He will be fine he CANT hurt himself....:hug:

Aww hun! I feel your pain! i have 9 nearly 10 months of broken sleep and it really begins to mess with you and your brain hey!

you must do what feels right for you! If he is not crying maybe leave him to see if he will go back to sleep himself? Some babies are just highly sensitve and some dont need much sleep both types are my ds.
Could he have a upset tummy from certain foods? Maybe he has something out of place? Have you thought of taking him to chiro? Thats my next step if Ds doesnt start sleeping better soon!
Do you put him down berfore he is tired? This was a tatic one of the girls suggested in my thread about not sleeping and Ds seems to have at least 4 hours now but after that he is up sometimes every hour?

Hope this helps a little! Best of luck! Just remeber to believe in your parenting!
xx

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Maybe i was looking for "permission" that its ok to leave him to sort it out for himself. Every morning i say "tonight, im leaving him, im not getting up every hour and a half" then i always end up doing it anyway!

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LOL, I do know what you mean. But you've got to be happy about it. Personally, (and I know this sort of stuff doesn't really belong in this section of the forum) I have left Natty to cry before, and it ALWAYS feels awful. I totally get people who are opposed to it. But, FWIW coming from me, if he's not crying, babes, he should be just fine! Psyche yourself up, and rest assured that he will be ok - you will be there for him if he gets upset. :hug:

My ds was waking like this after he got better from being sick. It was a nightmare, I can't image it being since birth! My health nurse suggested (ds goes to bed round 730-8pm) to feed him dinner at 5, then a bit more (or dessert) at 6 - to help keep his tummy full and he wont wake as often. It didn't help that night, but 2 nights after (so - the 3rd night) it worked. I think I also discovered that a nightlight helps. Ds also wakes in the middle of the night crying, probably coz he sat himself up in his sleep. From there, I comfort him back to sleep (I rock or breastfeed). Sometimes he'll think its a game and want to play so I leave him to it and he either goes to sleep on his own or plays and then cries for help to go back to sleep...

Hope things work out for you! Hang in there!

I've thought of using a nightlight, so he can "see" his way to lay back down on his own. But then someone said that a nightlight is too stimulating for them? :dunno:

Thanks for all your responses ladies. You've put a smile back on my face with all your hugs and encouragement. :hug:

How did you go last night ? better than us I hope Kai was in our bed at 10.30 the little bugger.....

I think its those moving and sound making night lights that stimulate them too much... You could always give it ago one night if it makes it worse then dont do it again...

So much of parenting is trial and eara(sp?)

He was in my bed from 2am....

He went to bed at 8pm (that was a bit later than normal cos he didn't wake up from his arvo nap til 5pm) then was awake again 10pm. Laid him back down and he went to sleep.

Then he woke up at 1.30am. Left him til it turned into a cry then went in to lay him back down. Then he woke up at 2am (probably hadn't actually been asleep) left him til it turned into a cry again, then gave up and put him bed with me as i had to work today and couldn't have kept that up for another 4 hours.... :rolleyes:

Aaaaarrrrrrrrggghhhhhh!!!!