DD is TT, is mum getting in the way?

Well, here is where we are:

If we are in the house and alone, and DD is bare-bummed she will reliably wee and now poo in the potty (YAY! she gets a lot of praise for this of course).

For short trips right after she has peed in the potty (she only poos once every day or two) she is reliably dry.

For longer trips she will tell me she needs to pee, but won't pee in a big toilet, even if i hold her (so far i've always had her in a disposable pull-up on longer trips out because of this).

If there is a visitor in she is unreliable and will pee on my bedroom carpet or in the hall (also carpeted). This is getting tiresome because her potty is perfectly mobile (she hauls it into my room in the morning to pee in it) and there is laminate which is far easier to clean in the living room and kitchen...

She still always has a very wet nappy in the morning and after naptime, so i'm not even looking at her being dry while sleeping.


So.... I'm wondering what to do next. I am toying with the idea of taking a whole week to let her be bare (in the house) and in pants (out and about) and see if she is ready to fully transition to pants. In a nappy she will pee without always telling me she needs to, then want to take it off right away because she doesn't like to be wet (i buy very cheap, not hugely absorbant ones for this reason). I DO think she's ready to TT, but i'm not sure about how to take it to the next step - if i train her bare-bummed will she then wet if she's wearing clothes? I just ordered a foldable loo seat which should help with the refusal to go in public loos, but tbh she dislikes the loo even in the house with me - how do we transition?

Another potential problem is XP - he doesn't let her be bare-bottomed because he rents a place with old and treasured rugs that he doesn't want to have to clean, and i don't know how to get him on board enough to understand that for a few weeks she's GOING to have accidents on occasion...? ANy ideas? This is my last weekend with DD away, after that his shifts are such that DP and i will have her every weekend, but then that means we're out and about a lot more, and thus if i'm going to have a week about the house i really need to plan it, iykwim...

Part of the problem is that i'm a really conscientious SAHMer (because *I* get bored, lol) so most days we'd normally be out, right out, not just at the very local park but across town in a museum, or out in DP's car, or at a toddler group in the next district over or whatever...

So, should we take a week "out" of life to help her tackle this, since she IS finding it harder to do when there are distractions, or do i just put her in pants on Monday, live life as normal, and take spare pants and bottoms with me JIC?

I did buy her pingu pants last week which she LOVES, but the first time i put them on her she peed in them so she could wear a different pair.. :rolleyes:

Bx

Hoobley

I had the same problem with DS when TT. I did exactly what your talking about. I got rid of the pull ups as he was just treating them as a nappy. I have undies on him all day except for when he is going down for a sleep. I always make a really big deal about him putting on his "big boy undies". I am still having trouble with Poo's with DS in that he will wait till he has a nappy on to go but Wee's are under control and it happened relatively quickly once we dumped the pull ups (within about 3 days). We do still get accidents very rarely (about once every 2 months). That is usually when he is playing with other kids when we are out and just forgets. I try to keep asking him and reminding him and he is getting much better.

If she is telling you when she is wet then I would say she is ready for TT.

I think if you just bit the bullet and say to yourself "Right no more nappies during waking hours" you will get the result you want. May take a few stressfull days for you but it will be worth it in the long run.

Good Luck

Bec, I am going through this with Lexie at the moment. So I feel your frustration.

What I did with Olivia and Charlie was bite the bullet and have a week at home. Boring as all bat****, but it broke the back of the transition. Their frustration at wanting to be fully TT was palpable, so I figured at least it would only be a week! It was a tedius week of constant "do you need the loo?" but it worked.

Then in the 2nd week, again, I just bit the bullet, packed spare undies & bottoms and socks and shoes and hoped for the best. I was amazed at their "holding on" power.......and their ability to enter into the spirit of it all with fun.......a mad speedy dash across the supermarket to the loo with Charlie clutching his willy, or "Mummy, I need to squat on a tree quick" from Olivia, LOL!

Good luck!

Bec we are TT now but my DD is less reliable about getting anything in the toilet, so I don't know if I'll be any help!

I decided that last Friday was THE day. I have four days in a row to spend at home with her and preschool is on board for Tuesday and Wednesday. We had bought her a pack of undies she chose ('princess' undies, :rolleyes: such a stereotypical girl, despite my best efforts!) and told her for the week leading up to it that Friday was the day to wear her undies and go to the toilet to do her wees and her poos. She was very excited about it, weather is great, on go the undies.

We lost three pairs on Friday, but each accident got a bit closer to the time I'd put her on the toilet. By the way, her preschool teacher suggested it's only the first pair of undies for the day that are the fancy ones, plain ones after that (haven't made a big fuss of it, but if Snow White gets wet, she goes in the wash). Nappy on for nap time - she totally soaked it and did a poo too. Dry all the way till bed time. Yesterday, one big accident in the morning (told me about it), wet nappy for nap time and dry all afternoon. Same so far today.

So although we are yet to actually see something in the toilet I'm amazed she's at least holding her bladder for 3 hours at a time! One more day tomorrow, we'll catch that pee yet! We've decided we're committed now, no turning back and she's at least happy to cooperate, so I'm sure her bladder will get the message soon.

It's great to have company Jennifer! I'd already thought of the undies thing - she has a plain pack too, so Pingu pants (not a typical girlie girl- a naturalist maybe? LOL) are the first pair and then it's plain whites all the way.

Well tomorrow morning DD is going to a big soft play area with her wee friend, but my new portable loo seat came and went to the sorting office because i was out running, so in order to prevent wee-wee-in-the-ball-pool type disasters, i'm going to put a pull-up on her tomorrow morning, pick up the parcel after the play session, and get her into pants on Tuesday. I did try her in pants on Friday but she just pees through them, albeit into the potty...

Will let you know how we go. Good luck to you and your little tiddly sweetie! :)

Bx

Bec, how's it going? We have had a couple of accidents this morning (at a playdate...), she just isn't sure quickly enough when she needs to go. But she proudly tells me 'I don't pee in Mummy's car!' so at least that's something that's gotten through! Her bladder control is great (hours in the afternoon) and we did a little wee in the toilet at church yesterday, so I'm sure she'll get there eventually. In the meantime, just as well we have lots of undies and understanding friends!

How are you going Bec?

After a week of feeling like we weren't really getting anywhere, finally... SHE DID IT!!!!

It took a whole week before it seemed to *click* (except at preschool, she could wee on the toilet there :rolleyes:). By Friday I was thinking I had really better see some improvement beyond just holding on for hours and Saturday we bit the bullet and went shopping...

Long story short, she finally did a wee on the little toilet at the shopping centre and the look on her face was priceless! She was so pleased she'd done it for Mummy and she hasn't looked back since. She's filling up her sticker chart so fast it'll be done by the end of the week. We've had a couple of accidents, because she doesn't yet come running to tell me she needs to go, but she'll wee (and poo!) when I put her on the toilet when she can. Even her nap time nappy has been dry for two days running.

So glad I can now relax a bit...!

Hope things are going well for you too.

Well i don't know where we're at. If she's in the house and bare-bummed she will reliably go in the potty now, even when there's guests in etc. BUT if she has ANY fabric against her, including pants, she will pee in them. *sigh*

I don't know how to get by this. If i put pants on her in the morning, she wets in them then takes them off, and goes bare, and then reliably uses the potty. If i put another pair on she does it again. I've always given up at 2. Should i just keep doing it over and over? I mean, i can't line-dry, and the dryer is seeing plenty of action as it is! Someone suggested putting a washcloth inside her nappy, so the "wet" feeling becomes more of an issue, but since she immediately removes a nappy when it's wet i don't think that's what she's missing. I guess maybe i should dress her in pants and take her out so if she wets she needs to come home wet, but she's wet herself before in the park (she was in a pull up but pooed in it and cried and begged to have it taken off, so i took it off and wiped her off with it and put her trousers back on and she wet about 5 minutes later) and she didn't even NOTICE!

I'm wondering if the potty, for all it's great for being accessible, is actually making it more difficult. Because if the potty is there she doesn't need to tell me, she just runs to the potty, but if she isn't telling me she will pee in her pants (twice she sat on the potty and peed through them, the other times she just crouched and peed on the floor). Maybe i should put it away and from tomorrow just put pants on her and tell her to tell me if she needs to go and she can go in the loo. I feel like we're paddling in the water, rather than learning to swim. I feel bad too because i have NO idea what i'm doing and i remember when i was small that the fact that my brother used the loo was my main impetus and instruction, and i feel like with DD emanation is not cutting it and i don't have anything else!

Bx

Aah, we're all in this together! LOL.

We're on day 2 here. We haven't gone down the potty track coz I didn't want to then re-train to the toilet, so it's straight to the loo for us. I've actually just cleaned out the laundry and cleaned up that toilet so we can spend today outside and use that loo. Yesterday was just wee after wee everywhere. The quantity & frequency shocked me I must admit. So I caved and put a pullup back on him. So we'll try again today.

Bec - does she have any little friends that are TT that could come and play for a day? Sometimes that can kickstart them a bit. I'll probably resort to that if nothing's going well by next week lol. As for the when she's wearing fabric she wees in it.. sorry I don't know how to tackle that one! All I'm doing when he wets his pants is getting him to strip and put himself on the toilet while I clean up.

I don't think Tallon has the concept of holding on yet.. perhaps he's not ready? He does tell us when he wees & poos.. I think he's definitely ready to train for poos in the loo .. he takes himself off to hide to poo, so he can just learn to take himself off to the toilet! But wees still seem to surprise him. But at least in undies he's definitely aware that he's done it.. which is why I guess I need to persevere.

Unfortunately all of DD's wee friends are boys (i know how she feels :D) and none of them can hold their wee yet...

Bx

Bec your little miss is obviously very independent and capable !! Lucy actually took her wet undies off and went and put them in the washing machine herself twice last week LOL.

We got two pink padded toilet seats for our toilets and I'm keeping her potty book for girls in the toilet (out of reach) which makes the whole trip a lot more interesting (not to mention, taking in teddy/dolly to show them how to use the toilet as well if she's so inclined). We also went down the route of giving a sticker for her sticker chart if she did a wee with me.

I would say it is worth persisting since she is so tuned in to what is supposed to happen. I believe poos come after they have the hang of weeing on the toilet anyway. Maybe give the big toilet a try ("just like Mummy")?

Good luck!

PS We are still doing well, no accidents at all yesterday and numerous stickers.

Maybe i should instigate a sticker chart. Yesterday she wore pants and trousers, we had 3 accidents, a soaking nappy at naptime, a few drops in the loo (i ran her down the hall as the accident was happening) and one pee in the potty (when XP was here and i was at the gym). Today she wet her first pair of pants within half an hour, and i was so demoralised i just left her bare and turned the heating on. Since then we have had 4 wee's and a poo in the toilet and no accidents.

So...she is TT if she's naked :lol: Brilliant news for a child who lives in a wet, cold city in scotland!

Bx

LOL Bec - she's just trying to let her Mummy know that she'd like to visit sunny Oz NOW!