Can being upset harm my baby

Some things in my life have been really stressful at the moment. I'm not sleeping properly because of it and last night I spent most of the night in a state crying because of the drama thats happening in my life. I dont want go into detail now as I don't want people to judge but I was up until about 5am and still have a splitting head ache. Probably the worst I have ever had. I am really concerned about my baby now because of the stress that I may have passed on. Does anyone know more about this and if my baby will be okay. I am really worried.

bub will be just fine. But u need to sort the issues out. A calm mum = a calm baby. big hugs darl and i hope things work out for u.

I think bub might be able to sense that you are upset but I don't think it can harm bub so please try not to stress too much about stressing (if that makes sense). I'm sending you a big hug and am not sure what is going on in your life but I really hope things settle down for you soon :hug:

Hi hun,

I know how worried you must feel. I went through ALOT of stress and tears while pregnant for one reason or another.

It is really important to try not to get yourself too worked up. There were times when I was so upset and worried that I would get some pain and BHs. It didn't hurt bub, I think just my bodies way of saying 'hey, calm down, theres a baby in here remember', but it important to take notice of these. I dont think stress can hurt the baby, but I have heard that prolonged stress can cause early labour.

I dont want this to worry you even more though, because I went through some heavy ***** while pregnant and Jazz is just fine :) and came right on time! It's just a good reason to try and work out whats going on, and do whats best for you and bub. If you need to chat I'm on msn :hug:

Hi hun,
I hope things are a bit better for you at the moment.I have two children and am pregnant with number 3. This pregnancy being older and wiser i have done so much reading. With my first child i was happy and so is he aged 11;very happy go lucky and cheerful. 2nd child,miserable marriage,cried alot and as a result i believe second child is rebellious,clingy and very drama queen.
I have just finished reading on hypnobirthing and the process believes you do need to filter your thoughts, and everything you see and watch as it does impact upon the fetus. Some things of course are unavoidable and will upset you. but try and focus on the big picture. You and your beautiful healthy baby. I no longer watch the news or any ci programs on optus. and if anyone decides to share birth or child horror stories i just look at my watch and say"Woops-i have to go"and cut them short!
The other thing is sweety meditate and take yourself off to do things that nurture your soul. shop,smell flowers,walk barefoot in the garden or beach,play music,dance go for a swim. Nurture and love you and you are doing the very best you can for bubba.

Just wanted to give you big :hug: Ali, I hope things improve!

Thanks so much girls.

I am starting to feel a lot better. My DP has been great and my little dogs have been giving me lots of cuddles. I think they can sense when you are not feeling right.

To put a long story short...this awful girl who is so jealous of my DP and me (she is obsessed with him) found out I was pregnant and she sent an awful message on facebook saying that "I hope you have an ugly retarded baby" and a lot more other nasty things. She has called me the most awful names that I can not even repeat and I could tolerate this but when she said that about our child I lost it. I don't know what I did to deserve this but I honestly think there is something not right in her head. I was so hurt that someone could wish something like that on someone that I was distraught. DP is furious with her for being so vicious and has given her a piece of his mind and I have contacted facebook to complain about her but I cant believe the stress that it has caused. DP wants to go to the police about her harrassing us but there isnt much they can do as she hasnt threatened us.

I am hoping things are going to sort themselves out and she leaves us alone but I suppose I have to realise that some things are out of my control. The only thing I can try and control is me and I want to do the best I can for my little one. If she wants to be childish (actually I dont even know a child that could be that mean) then that just shows people exactly what she is like.

I have been listening to lots of calm music and catching up on some of the missed sleep I have had. I am lucky that I am just starting 2 weeks holidays so I might take the time out to go for a walk down at the beach and do some calming things for the baby and me.

It is so nice to know that there are complete strangers that care and are so supportive. Thanks for all your tips on how to keep calm and keep baby stress free. We have our scan next week so I am hoping i will get to see that our little one is just fine in there.

Just wanted to give yu a big :hug:. Don't worry about the silly cow. She sounds awful, but really she has no impact on you with her stupidity. Ignore her and she will go away. Enjoy this time with your DP and puppies and before you know it she will have moved on. People like that are so fickle.

Take care xx

Omg Ali, what a horrible person! She obviously doesn't have much else going on if she feels the need to interfere in your life so much.
If she is in your friends on facebook just delete her and put your profile on private. Then she shouldn't be able to send you msg's or anything. :hug: You are growing a beautiful healthy baby and have so much to look forward to!! Obviously she doesn't have the same.

:hug: AliBaby, I would definitely block this person on Facebook and make your privacy settings as tight as possible.

I think the hypnobirthing stuff would be good for you as it also teaches you how to use your breathing to relax and slow down your heart rate etc. I use it to help me get back to sleep at night when I wake up stressing about things.

Babies are very resilient to though - women give birth to healthy babies in all sorts of situations, going through famines, wars, terrorost attacks, floods - you name it. So don't stress too much about your bub, I'm sure everything will be fine!

Don't worry about your baby. We've just been studying this at uni, and extreme stress can sometimes affect a baby in the third trimester. But not with too serious results.

Your baby is nice and snug in there and very protected. Your baby won't have felt the stress you have been feeling.

OMG people can be so cruel sometimes, she is just jealous of you.. I would do what the other girls have said and block her and any contact from the nasty piece of work that she is.. I had an emotional time a few months before i had ds and everything was fine, just remember to look after yourself as she is not worth getting upset about and you are going to have a beautiful baby soon and she wont..

I have blocked her and made sure everything is private on all settings. It is sad that people can be cruel and want to intentionally upset a pregnant woman but as you said Abb, it is probably jealousy.
SJ and Mistree- thanks for your tips on how to get rid of her on FB. Very helpful so thanks again.
Nai- I will speak to my midwife about hypnobirth. It sounds like I would benefit from that.
Gabi- Thanks for the info on what you have beeen studying at uni. It is good to know that tests have been done on this and that baby wouldn't have been effected too much.

You girls have just been wonderful. Thankyou again for your support. And big :hugs: to all of you.

She sounds horrible. How childish.

Don't worry about your stress level. The kind of stress level that could affect a pregnancy is from something like the death of a close relative or a major illness during the pregnancy, not everyday kind of stress.

I had heaps of everyday stress during my pregnancy (like work stress, stress over having to have an amnio due to a 1/37 chance of DS, stress because of a scan that showed abnormal blood flow, general stress over lack of symptoms, stressing about my age & giving birth etc etc) and none of it ever affected the pregnancy.

Someone at my mothers group told me that oldwives tale about being stressed during pregnancy causes an unsettled baby. I laughed. My baby has been as settled as can be but I have been very calm since giving birth so I think that's what counts.

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Some things in my life have been really stressful at the moment. I'm not sleeping properly because of it and last night I spent most of the night in a state crying because of the drama thats happening in my life. I dont want go into detail now as I don't want people to judge but I was up until about 5am and still have a splitting head ache. Probably the worst I have ever had. I am really concerned about my baby now because of the stress that I may have passed on. Does anyone know more about this and if my baby will be okay. I am really worried.

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I'm so sorry you are having to deal with very upsetting events. It's hard enough when you *don't* have a lot of pregnancy hormones to deal with as well.

In a nutshell, yes, stress can be a risk factor, for high blood pressure, for low birth weight, and for your own ongoing health and wellbeing. Stress can suppress your immune system and leave you vulnerable to infections. That doesn't mean you've done damage to your baby and if there are ill effects it is usually because of prolonged extreme stress, not a one-off traumatic event. What it does mean is that for your own sake and your baby's, you need to do what you can to deal with the stress you are facing in as healthy a manner as you can. Prolonged stress can make ante and post-partum depression more of a possibility.

If you are not finding you are dealing with this horrible situation, please seek further help. Do you have supportive people around you who you can unload to? Is there any possibility of getting some counselling to help you get through this period? Hypnotherapy is a wonderful thing, particularly in pregnancy. You can buy relaxation tapes and CDs - even if you can achieve a state of relaxation once or twice a day, it can help with your general coping. You produce a hormone called cortisol when you are stressed, and your baby is exposed to that hormone. Whatever you can do to lower your feelings of agitation and anxiety, even if you can't make the stressful feelings go away altogether, will be beneficial for you and the baby.

Her words don't become truth because she's said them. I know it's hard to accept that sometimes. I always say to my kids, "If someone calls you a ham sandwich, it doesn't make you a ham sandwich." I've suffered from a severe anxiety disorder for quite some time and it's been a hard long road to get to a point where I can deal with it.

Oh AliBaby - you poor thing! :hug:

What a bit@!. I can't believe someone could be so awful. It's good that you have support from your partner and he's sticking up for you. Sounds like she's mentally unbalanced and you've done the right thing blocking her. Just remember it's not your fault or problem.

This should be a really happy and exciting time for you and your partner and she's got major issues to be raining on your parade like she is - i'm sure her other friends have seen what she has written and are thinking the same thing! You'd have to be a monster to act like that.

Just try to relax and block her negative crap out! if she continues to harass you, you an copy and paste it and print it out and go the police, they mightn't be able to do a lot but i had a situation where i was being harassed and followed by an ex friend and they phoned him up and warned him if he continued they would press charges - it's enough to scare most people out of their sickening behaviour.

good luck hun. xo

I would say, try not to take her rubbish on as it's just negative energy that you and bubs do not need which can lead to stress. If she is not important to you and does not have a place in your life then just try and forget the nasty things she has said and try to concentrate on other more positive things, like your family. You will feel alot better for it :)