what to do - the eternal question

It seems that deciding on whether to go back to work or not is the eternal question!
I've been tossing backwards and forwards on the idea of whether to go back to work at the start of the new school year (I'm a teacher), and I'm so confused! Its beginning to get me down.

I was contract, so don't have a position to go back to - I would have to re-apply and wait until almost, if not, the start of the school year before any likely placements would come up.

I'll only go back 2 days, so 0.4, and my mum, and my mil will have dd, who will be 7 months at the start of the school year.

It would have to take into account where the school was for practical reasons - so that it wouldn't be any more than an 8am-4pm that dd was at our parents.

Going back is purely being driven by a financial need, other than a professional one - we made the decision that i would worry about any career progression once all thekids were in school. plus, i'm studying a post grad in my field.

What should i do? if it wasn't for the fact that being on dh's wage only wasn't becoming a struggle, and we're depleting our savings, I would be staying at home definately for 12 months. Even though its family looking after dd, i'm till not entirely sure i want to leave her at that age.

Any advice would be great. Any other teachers gone back part time and found it works?

Cheers
Sam

:hug: It is not an easy one is it?

I am not a teacher but I went back pt when each of my boys was around that age. I was dreading leaving them, and the first days are hard, but overall it was actually easier than I was expecting. I think pt can be a good balance - it gives you some "time out" from being a mum, and the adult company can be beneficial, it gives your DD a chance to bond with her grandparents and gets her used to being cared for by others, and if it takes the pressure off financially it can give you all a better quality of life.

Only you know what is right for you. If money is tight it can be very stressful. Working when you don't want to be can be very stressful. You really need to find the option which will work best for you, your DH and your DD. One option might be to go back and then resign if it's not working out.

Anyway, I wish you luck with your decision. It isn't easy. But it isn't permanent either. And usually the thought of leaving our little ones is worse than the actual leaving. Best of luck hun.

I am not a teacher either but from what we have worked out I will have to start back at work but PT after just 3 months cause we can't afford to live on the one income for too long. I am like you and have saved as well but that will get eaten up by bills and every day costs etc. I am lucky enough that my company will let me work from home a couple of days a week up until the 6 months then I will have to work FT but split it up between the office and home. But still the thought of leaving my little man as early as 6 months even for a couple of days is terrifying and I haven't even meet him yet. If there is any reason for post natal depression I think this has to be one of the big ones!

Another option could be doing some nightfill/night-time work and cutting out the cost of childcare - if DH was happy to assist or able to? It's not teaching, but often not too labour intensive, a bit of excercise, communication with adults and not bad money, especially if on a casual rate and not paying childcare.

Bunnings nightfill often only goes no later than 11pm.

What about private tutoring?

It's certainly a hard one but as someone else said, often the thought is worse than the reality.

I work a 5-day fortnight and have done so since DD was 11 months old. That has been really, really good especially as DP is a shiftworker and often worked 9 days straight which meant I didn't really get a break.

I find that I really do need a break from the routine of looking after DD and we are lucky that we qualify for in-home care so someone comes into our home to look after DD.

I think you have a few options. Perhaps look at your budget again and see how much longer your savings will last. Sometimes, it's helpful to give ourselves a milestone and say that we're going to stay home for 12 months.

Otherwise if you don't think the money is going to last, make the preparations to go back in Jan. You can always change your mind OR resign and find an alternative that suits you better. But really you won't know how you feel until you do it.

Hey there,

Tricky question. I hate thinking about this too and I'm only 26wks pg!

I have a friend who is a teacher and she went back when DS was 12 months I think... she has also gone back PT, I can't remember what allocation, but she works four days but only an hour or two on each day.

So she has a little time each morning away from DS and then is back to him.

She loves it and it is working well for them.

I think the key is making it an empowered choice - if you feel like you "have" to go back then you will end up resenting it and missing your bubba. Whereas if you sit down, look at the finances and say "Right, if I go back these two days, we can afford to do X, Y and Z" and get motivated for going back, then it'll work.

You need to make the decision that is right for you and not feel like you're being forced into it.

That's just my POV anyway!