Why am i doing this to myself?

I am 9 weeks and 2 days pregnant only found out 2 weeks ago and over the past week I have become almost obsessed with thinking that I am going to go for my scan next Friday and they are going to say that I have had a missed miscarriage. It happened to my sister in law a couple of years ago and also a friend earlier this year so I think that must be where my fear is coming from.

After spending 18 months trying to get pregnant and believing that we would have to try IVF last year this pregnancy was a shock to say the least and I am finding it hard to believe that it has actually happened. My HcG levels at 8 weeks were 24000 and the doctor said that was a sign it is a good strong pregnancy. I have had tiredness, some nausea, loss of appetite, backache and sore BBs but over the past couple of days the tiredness and the sore BBs have reduced, although the backache and nausea are still the same and every time I get a twinge in my tummy I have a minor panic thats its not just stretching pains. I did have a very light pale pink spot when I wiped on Sunday but we had done the deed that afternoon so I thought it might have come from that and there was nothing more came of it.

Everyone else I know who is pregnant seems to be telling everyone really early on, like 6 weeks, and doesn't seem concerned or worried that something might happen whereas I am obsessed with it, constantly doing internet seaches, reading articles, finding bits in books.

Has anyone else experienced similar worries at this level and stage or is it my body trying to tell me something? My scan is next Friday - should I just relax, cross my legs and hang on until then or is there something else I can do?

Sorry for sounding so morbid and depressing, actually just typing this all out has made me feel a bit better, thank goodness for Belly Belly!

Cara1979

Cara,
Almost all of us has had this feeling. I was the same as you. I spent more time thinking about the fact that I might loose the baby than I did that I would keep it. The silly part is there is nothing you can do cause this is all in Gods hands. In fact worrying about it and obsessing like you are is likely to have a negative affect on your bub. So as everyone says, easier said than done. Try sending your time researching the positive things you have to look forward to rather than the negative. In just 3 weeks you will already be 12 weeks along and the risk of m/c is reduced significantly. Also remember that bubs can feel your negative attitude and can make him/her feel bad. So maybe start talking to your tummy and speaking positive words. Speaking out positive words is far healthier than quietly obessessing about negative things.
A wise person once told me the 95% of all the things we worry about will never come to pass!

Try not to stress too much and i know that is easier said than done. I had spotting that started at 8wks and would come and go every couple of weeks until i reached 18 wks and nothing since....our bub is fine! Also i my DR told me to "use other forms of pleasure" until i was past the first trimester, just to be safe...i had to almost laugh when she told me that LOL!

GL

It is fairly normal to be worried about the progression of your little ones well being. I think it is an internal protection mechanism, JIC things are not what they should be when you have your scan. You have positive sounding symptoms, I'm sure everything will be ok.

Yep - been there done that. We also took awhile to fall preganant about 16 mths. We waited for the first scan to see the heart beat which was at about 9 weeks. (I had to pay for it but asked for a scan for dating)

There is an article posted here somewhere that showed the chance of miscarriage after the heartbeat and it was very low something like less than 2%. So we waited for the scan and then let everyone know. I've had other friends wait the full 12 weeks so the risks are even smaller.

Congrats on your pregnancy!!!

Cara - I feel EXACTLY the same!!!
I am holding out until 12 weeks and I can tell people
So far only hubby, mum and a few close friends know.
I still worry all the time. My US isnt until 9th Nov!!! I am hanging for that day!

Hi there Cara,

thought to write as, like you we had been trying for just over 18 months to fall pregnant (our OB told us that IVF was our only hope, but we thought to keep trying el naturale for as long as possible). when i finally fell pregnant i was in denial for awhile. i didnt test until i was just over 6 weeks (even tho my DF and best friend had inklings).

Once i got that BFP the anxiousness set in. i had very little faith in my body at that time and just couldnt get my head around the fact that we were sooo lucky to be having a baby. i googled every twinge and pain and had convinced myself that i had an ectopic pregnancy or was going to miscarry at any moment...

I waited until after the NT scan to tell ppl (at 12 weeks). i told my family as soon as i did the HPT as i knew they would support us, even if we lost the bubba, and my best friend also knew straightaway as she busted me going to the docs for a BT!

So, i guess, the fear is perfectly normal, and the first step in becoming mummies to a little bub!

Congratulations by the way!! how exciting!!

Thank you all soooo much for your replies, you have all made me feel much much better and I am going to try and do my best just to relax and think good positive thoughts until next Friday when we WILL see our bubs heartbeat - see positive thinking already!

I am sure this worrying is to prepare us all for a life of motherhood and worrying constantly for the rest of our lives about our bubbas!

Sticky Vibes and thanks to all!

Cara1979

Every time I am worrying about something (which is pretty often): a spot of blood or a twinge in my tummy or whatever, I try to remind myself to picture myself, 6 months in the future, with my baby in my arms. And to hold that positive image in my mind until I am focusing on that very good and likely thing rather than on the unlikely possible bad things.

It's helping...

I was worried through the entire pregnancy that something would go wrong. When I spotted early on I thought it was all over as it had been before, got over that then it happened again... same thoughts. Then I was convinced there'd be no heartbeat when I had a scan because of the spotting. There was a heartbeat. When it was the NT scan I was convinced there'd be no heartbeat. Again there was a heartbeat. Then I had an amnio and was worried I'd miscarry. I didn't. Every odd pain would make me worry. Once movement started if I didn't feel movement for a few days I'd worry, later on if I didn't feel it for a few hours I'd panic. Even during labour I remember thinking "the baby is dead" just because it took them a while to find the heartbeat on a couple of occasions.

I wasn't convinced all would go well until Brock was in my arms. If I could do it over I would try to stop worrying about everything, which turned out to be nothing, and enjoy the pregnancy to it's full extent because before you know it, it's all over and done with.